


Overcome in this War of Hearts

by beatiewrites



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alec Lightwood & Jace Wayland Friendship, Alec Lightwood Deserves Nice Things, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Background Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood, Background Simon Lewis/Jace Wayland, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Good Friend Lydia Branwell, Good Parabatai Jace Wayland, I Tried, M/M, Not Beta Read, Parabatai, Parabatai Bond, Simon Lewis & Alec Lightwood Friendship, idk what i was doing with this, im a terrible writer, malec deserves the world, please forgive me if you hate it, word vomit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:09:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 53,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28626270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beatiewrites/pseuds/beatiewrites
Summary: Ever since he was a little boy, Alec Lightwood anticipated meeting his soulmate. The notion of a single person being who he needed in life as much as they needed him was so magical and Alec spent each day of his life waiting to meet the Shadowhunter who would take his breath away and steal his heart.That was until he met the warlock, Magnus Bane.(COMPLETE. Updating every Tuesday and Friday AEST)
Relationships: Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Simon Lewis/Jace Wayland
Comments: 108
Kudos: 254





	1. Hold Your Breath

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Over 13 years of following the book series and then the tv show (let's forget the movie existed), I am finally writing my first Malec fic. They are one of my two comfort couples and I dont know where I would be without them. This fic will be a mix of details from the books and the tv show. This is completely self-indulgent and it was this random idea I had. It's all word vomit so I'm sorry if you don't enjoy it. I'm a terrible writer but it's something I enjoy doing so yeah :) 
> 
> I have finished writing the entire fic so you don't need to worry about starting it and it never ending. I will be posting chapters regularly, once or twice a week so please subscribe to stay updated!
> 
> I hope you enjoy going on this journey with me!

“Come on, Alec, lighten up a bit!” Jace yelled out over the loud music, “We’re at a party!”

“Exactly, big brother. Let loose!” Isabelle encouraged, grinning at Jace.

Alec rolled his eyes and kept his grip on his seraph blade that sat against his hip. “You both do realise that we are on a mission, right?”

“Yes, but from what I hear, Magnus throws the best parties, and we are always working so hard. Why can’t we have a little fun?” Isabelle said, as she glanced around the party, checking out the different creatures that were there. Not a single Shadowhunter in sight – except for them, of course.

“I don’t think Clary would approve of you partying,” Alec said, raising an eyebrow.

Isabelle shrugged. “She trusts me, I trust her. We would never hurt each other.”

“And you?” Alec asked, facing Jace.

“Simon knows I like a good party. I’m not going to cheat on him,” Jace explained, taking a step forward into the crowd. “Come on. We might as well get what we came for.”

Alec’s heart clenched. He wished he had what they had. That bond. That explicit trust with someone.

Ever since Alec Lightwood was a young boy and he had learnt about soulmates, that someone out there was made just for him. He would constantly talk to his parents and siblings about how excited he was to meet them, how excited he was to spend the rest of his life with them. The notion of a single person being who he needed in life as much as they needed him was so magical and Alec spent each day of his life waiting to meet the Shadowhunter who would take his breath away and steal his heart. As each year passed, he felt like his chances were getting slimmer. His friends and siblings naturally found their soulmates and he had yet to find anyone. He never talked about it with his siblings, always trying to be the big brother, stoic and born leader that he was, but he held onto the tiny sliver of hope inside him that there was someone out there waiting to meet him as much as he was waiting for them.

Alec hated clubs. He especially hated this one. The music was pounding in his ears and he grimaced, a direct opposite of how excited his siblings looked. This was definitely their scene, not his. Alec preferred order and peace and quiet, so that he could at least hear his own thoughts. The club was filled with a range of creatures, vampires, warlocks, and seelies, dancing and grinding against each other to the beat of the music playing out of the abnormally large speakers. Waiters walked around with multi-coloured drinks on trays, one of them offering Alec a drink but he knew better than to trust what was in one of those shot glasses. A Downworlder party was the last place Alec had expected to be on this particular night and he couldn’t wait to get the chance to leave.

The Shadowhunters pushed their way through the crowd of sweaty bodies, Alec scowling the whole way through. Jace clapped him on the back, grinning, and Alec could only roll his eyes in response. Jace jerked his chin in the distance at a warlock, most likely the owner of the club, sitting on what seemed to be a throne atop a small set of steps, indicating that that person was their target for the night. Alec nodded and lifted his head to take a quick glance.

Alec only looked for a second. He swore it was a second, but it was like time had stopped. For a second, it was like the music around him had stopped and everyone else disappeared, his vision zooming in on that one person. For a second, he felt his heart skip a beat and his lungs constrict in his chest, making it hard for him to breathe. For a second, he was frozen in his position, feet stuck to the floor as his vision filled with only that man.

Isabelle’s hand on his back brought him back to reality as she looked at him with worry. “Alec are you okay?”

Alec shook his head to clear it and blinked a few times, not understanding what had just happened to him. “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Let’s go.”

Isabelle kept her hand on Alec’s back – in a way, it kept him grounded and calm – as they made the rest of the way through the crowd. It took them no time at all to reach their target.

Jace cleared his throat as they reached the bottom of the steps where the warlock was sitting on his throne. The warlock, who was whispering something into a faerie’s ear with a smirk, turned to look at them and immediately scowled.

“Ah, Children of the Nephilim,” the man said, gracefully standing up from his seat, his eyes regarding them with disdain. “I don’t remember inviting any of you to my little soiree.” The man waved his hands around, indicating to his event, as little blue sparks of magic left his fingers. “This may be a public club, but this is a private party.”

“Magnus Bane, we need your assistance,” Jace said, almost like an order and Magnus certainly didn’t like being ordered around.

“And why should I help any of you?” Magnus asked, looking down at the Shadowhunters, raising his eyebrows.

“It’s about Asmodeus,” Isabelle explained.

“Oh, my wonderful, marvellous father,” Magnus said sarcastically. “What has the old man been up to these days?”

“There’s been a high influx of demons over the past few days. We think it’s him.”

“Why do you think it’s my father?”

“There’s a very high energy signature, one that can only be given off by a Greater Demon. Only a Prince of Hell can control this many demons at one time.”

“Then it could be anyone. Maybe Azazel broke free and has decided to terrorise Earth.”

“Oh, he also left this,” Jace said, pulling out his phone and holding up a picture of a six-pointed star with lines that overlapped joining each point with each other, showing no start or end to the star. “This is his pentagram, isn’t it?”

Magnus visibly tensed, a twitch in his face indicating his repulsion. “It is,” he replied, voice hard.

“So, will you help us?” Jace asked, pocketing his phone.

Magnus thinned his lips and hummed, looking between the three Shadowhunters. “I’ll help. I don’t come cheap.”

“What do you want?” Isabelle asked.

Magnus’ eyes focused on the tall Shadowhunter with black hair who wasn’t even paying attention to him. “Him.”

Alec hadn’t been paying too much attention to the conversation, knowing that his siblings could handle it. They were better at negotiation and relations with Downworlders than he was anyway. He was better suited to sticking to the shadows and watching his siblings’ backs for any potential threats that could come flying at them any second. With this many Downworlders in one place, Alec was on high alert, one hand gripping tightly onto his bow as his other hand held onto the leather strap of his quiver going across his chest. It was his sister’s elbow nudging him that brought him into the conversation. Alec looked at his sister with annoyance before turning to face the warlock.

Magnus Bane was lean and tall, his well-fitted suit shining each time the lights from the club hit it. His hair was styled up into a quiff, the fiery red tips standing out against his black hair. He had different lengths of necklaces adorning his neck and various piercings on his ears. His slender fingers were fiddling with one of the many rings he was wearing, his black nail polish a contrast to the tan skin of his hands. Magnus Bane was clearly an excessive man, not someone Alec tended to associate with.

“If you’re checking me out, you should at least look at my face, pretty boy,” Alec heard a smooth voice say, forcing him to lift his head.

All it took was the locking of their eyes for Alec to tense up and freeze. It happened again. The world stood at a standstill as everything and everyone around them faded away. There was a pang in Alec’s chest and even with his brain telling him to move, Alec couldn’t. His heart was hammering against his ribcage, getting faster as each second passed by. His breath caught in his throat as heat was building inside his body. Everything was feeling tight and hot, every fibre in his being vibrating, and Alec didn’t understand it. He had never felt anything like this before. There was a faint calling of his name but Alec couldn’t even register it. All he could see was the man in front of him and the shine of his eyes as the man moved towards him.

Alec didn’t even notice Magnus was standing right in front of him until he felt a soft hand on his cheek, the touch allowing him to finally take in the breath he had been holding. Alec closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, relishing in the warmth against his skin. He couldn’t explain it but the touch felt like it was something he didn’t even know he had been craving for his entire life. It was something that was supposed to be there all along and he had just been missing it, longing for it.

“Who are you?” he heard a low voice whisper, somehow relaxing all the tension in his body.

“Alec,” he breathed, opening his eyes and looking deeply into the man’s golden cat eyes. Alec smiled and cupped the man’s face in his hands. “Your eyes are beautiful.”

“Alec. Alexander,” Magnus said just as soft, the name just rolling off his tongue and filling Alec with so much warmth.

“Alright, that’s enough,” Alec heard Jace huff, his hand grabbing the back of Alec’s shirt and pulling him away, breaking Alec out of his trance.

Alec frowned, furrowing his eyebrows, not exactly sure of what had just happened to him. He shook his head and staggered back, trying to get rid of the haze going on inside his head. The room was spinning and Alec tried to keep his eyes on the floor to gain his bearings. His hand was gripping tightly to his shirt over where his heart was and he unconsciously rubbed the area in an attempt to get rid of the numbing pain that was only growing in his chest.

“What did you do to me?” Alec rasped, glaring up at Magnus, their eyes locking once again.

“I didn’t do anything,” Magnus protested, his voice strained. “We’re s –”

“No!” Alec exclaimed, clutching at his shirt even tighter. “You’re going against the Accords. What spell did you put on me?”

Magnus took a hesitant step closer to Alec. “Alexander, darling, I would never hurt my soulmate.”

Alec heard Isabelle let out a small gasp, his focus entirely on Magnus. “What are you talking about? Who’s your soulmate?”

“You.”

It took a second for the revelation to start settling in. The way his body reacted when he looked at Magnus from clear across the club, the way his body reacted when he locked eyes with Magnus, and the way his body was reacting in this very moment, it all made sense. But it wasn’t something that Alec could accept. There had to be a different logical explanation.

By the Angel, his soulmate couldn’t be a warlock. It just couldn’t be.

Alec’s eyes widened in panic. “No… I- I need to get out of here.”

Turning on his heels, Alec ran through the dancing crowd as fast as his staggering legs could take him. He could hear Jace calling out his name behind him but he ignored it. He couldn’t stay in this place, not with the warlock there. The walls were closing in on him and the people were getting too close to him. He wanted to yell at people to get out of his way but he couldn’t get a word out, he could barely breathe. The longer he was in this place, the more he felt like he was suffocating. The only thing that was making Alec get out of this place was his determination.

It wasn’t until Alec got outside onto the street that he was able to take a few deep breaths, letting the fresh night air fill his lungs. He bent over with hands on his knees, trying to breathe, before hitting his chest with his fist, hoping the pain he could feel around his heart would dissipate.

Alec knew that every soulmate meeting would be different. No two were ever the same, but they were magical and meaningful. Two souls finding each other always were. This… This was not. It wasn’t right. He refused to believe it.

There was no way he could stay here any longer. Alec needed to leave. He stood up as best he could, panting as he turned his head both ways, looking up and down the street. He made a quick turn down the street and staggered his way back home to the Institute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	2. Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> figured i would post two chapters on the first day of this so i hope you guys enjoy this one :)

Alec sat on the edge of his bed, his head in his hands, trying to make sense of the predicament he was in. He had waited his whole life for his soulmate and he hoped that one day he would meet a brave and strong Shadowhunter who his parents would approve of. But as much as he tried to deny it, Alec knew that Magnus was his soulmate. There was just that nagging feeling in the back of his head that told him it was true. This didn’t mean that he had to accept it. He more than wanted to not accept it. If he had the chance to make it not true, he would take it. His soulmate couldn’t be a warlock.

Warlocks were magical, powerful beings with one parent being human and the other being a demon. Alec was a Shadowhunter with angel blood running through his veins. No good relationship could come out of two people who were complete opposites, especially when one was of demon blood and the other was of angel blood. It was just utterly wrong.

A knock at his door brought Alec out of his thoughts. He lifted his head and looked at the door, only to see Jace popping his head in with a smile.

“Hey, can I come in?”

Alec sighed and nodded, sitting up straight.

“You doing okay, buddy?” Jace asked, sitting down next to his parabatai., placing a hand on his back in comfort.

“I don’t know, Jace. This wasn’t the way it was supposed to go,” Alec said, his voice strangled.

“Hey, it’s going to be okay. You could have had worse people be your soulmate.”

“By the Angel, he’s a warlock, Jace. I can’t be with a warlock.”

“Why? Cause he’s a Downworlder?” Jace asked accusingly, pulling away from Alec.

“No, that’s not- You know that’s not what I meant.” Alec sighed. “I like Simon. He’s good for you. It’s just- Our parents would never allow this. Shadowhunters aren’t supposed to mix with Downworlders, especially in that way. It’s even worse that he’s half-demon. His father is Asmodeus, for crying out loud.”

“Robert and Maryse never said anything about me with Simon.”

“That’s because you’re Jace. You’re reckless and unpredictable and, of course, you would have a mundane-turned-vampire as your soulmate because having a Shadowhunter would be too normal and boring for you. I’m not you.”

“Alec, fate wouldn’t have chosen Magnus if he wasn’t the right person for you. It doesn’t matter what you are or what people will think, Magnus was meant for you.”

Alec shook his head. “I can’t do this, Jace. I just… I can’t.”

Jace placed a reassuring hand on Alec’s shoulder and squeezed. “Look, there’s no law that says that you have to be with your soulmate. It’s just something people do. If you don’t want to be with him, then don’t be with him. I just want you to be happy.”

Alec let out a sad laugh. “It’s so funny. I’ve been waiting my whole life for my soulmate. I’ve been wanting what you and Izzy have, what my parents have. My wishes have finally been answered and now I wish that I never wished for anything at all.”

“It’s going to be okay, Alec. Whatever your decision may be, I’ll stand by you. You’re my parabatai and I know you’ll make the right decision.” Jace gave Alec a tight hug before standing up and stretching his legs. “Just imagine how great it would be to see the Clave’s faces when they find out that the next Head of the New York Institute has an all-powerful warlock as his soulmate.”

Alec rolled his eyes and smiled for the first time in what felt like a long time.

“Let’s get out of here. Izzy and Clary want us in the Ops Centre. There’s some things we need to go over.” Jace held out his hand to his parabatai with a raised eyebrow, silently urging him to take it.

Alec sighed and took Jace’s hand, standing up and hearing his knees crack. “Shit”

“You’re getting old, brother,” Jace snickered.

“Shut up,” Alec mumbled, playfully punching Jace’s arm. “Are you going to hold my hand the whole way there?”

“Don’t you think it’s cute?” Jace smirked and tightened his hold on Alec’s hand before saying, “just like when we were kids”, and dragged Alec out of his room.

As soon as Alec entered the Ops Centre, a flash of red came barrelling towards him, wrapping him in a tight hug.

“I’m so happy for you, Alec!” he heard a familiar voice squeal as he looked down and saw Clarissa Fairchild, his sister’s soulmate, cling onto him.

“Uh, thanks, Clary,” Alec replied, awkwardly patting the girl’s head.

“Clary, honey, I don’t think it’s something Alec wants to talk about,” Isabelle said, placing a hand on Clary’s shoulder and pulling her away from Alec. Alec gave his sister a small smile of thanks and she nodded back at him as if to say ‘I’ve got you’.

“You two are so cute,” Alec heard Simon comment, turning his head and following Simon’s line of sight to his hand being held in Jace’s. Alec rolled his eyes and grumbled under his breath.

“I told you it was cute,” Jace said proudly before stepping forward, not letting go of Alec’s hand, and placing a kiss on Simon’s cheek. “Hey, babe.”

Simon smiled wide and breathlessly replied with just a simple, “hey”.

Alec watched his siblings with their soulmates and his heart sank into his stomach at the thought that he was never going to be able to have what they had. He could see Isabelle consoling a pouting Clary and it only took seconds for Clary to be smiling at his sister with her eyes full of love. He could see Simon and Jace smiling at each other, having their own silent conversation because no one else deserved or needed to know what went on between them. Alec wanted that bond with someone. He _knew_ he had that bond with someone. But no matter how much his body wanted it, how much he wanted it, Alec couldn’t be with his soulmate.

Alec felt that pang in his chest again and grimaced slightly, his free hand coming up to rub at his chest in circles.

When would this pain ever go away?

Jace tugged on Alec’s hand, startling him out of his thoughts, and dragged him to the maps table that was projecting a holographic map of New York City.

Alec ignored the pain in his chest and schooled his expression into one of a serious leader before looking at Clary. “Alright, so what do we got?”

“We’ve located the rift of where the demons are coming from. Right here,” Clary explained, pointing at the red X on the map. “The Clave got a warlock to help us close it up.”

“We can’t assume this is going to be the only rift that will appear,” Isabelle said with a frown.

“What about the demons? Any mundane casualties?” Alec asked, lifting his arm only to notice Jace was still holding his hand. He shook his hand, trying to get Jace to let go but his parabatai only grinned at him instead. Alec looked at his parabatai unamused but let him do as he pleased.

Isabelle tapped her tablet a few times before putting up pictures of different demons on the screen in front of the maps table. “There’s been quite a few shax demons and drevak demons, plenty of imps and there’s been a report of at least one raum demon.”

“Luckily, no mundane casualties,” Clary continued. “There’s been a few miniscule injuries but mostly they only seem to be scaring people before hiding away. Simon’s managed to get Raphael’s help with encanto-ing people to forget. All we’ve got right now are demons and one pentagram.”

Alec frowned and looked down at the map, studying the X standing out at him. “What does Asmodeus want?” he asked softly, mostly to himself.

“Knowing my father,” Alec heard a voice coming from behind him say, making his heart jump in his chest, “it’s destruction.”

Alec spun around, eyes wide, his whole body locking into place. Making his way into the Ops Centre was Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn, Alec’s soulmate, in all his glory. Magnus looked somewhat toned-down compared to how he appeared at his club. Dressed in a pair of slim fitting jeans and a plain white t-shirt with a burgundy coat, Magnus looked quite comfortable yet stylish. He wasn’t without his usual accessories, three necklaces around his neck and rings on every second finger. Alec never got a good look before but now he could clearly see Magnus’ face. Magnus was evidently a handsome man. Thin nose, full lips, strong jawline, beautiful tan skin showing his Asian heritage. The warlock looked young, not a line on his face, except for around his eyes, eyes that seemed older the longer you looked into them. Magnus was beautiful.

Alec could feel the want, the _need_ , in his body to step forward and take Magnus into his arms, but he held his ground. This was not the right time or place.

There never would be a right time or place.

“Magnus,” Alec managed to breathe out. “What are you doing here?”

Magnus glided over to Alec. “Oh, you know, my soulmate ran away from me and I was desperate to see him again.” Alec gulped, a sense of guilt surfacing. “Also, I figured I could impress my soulmate by helping out and maybe he would agree to go on a date with me.”

“I…” Alec had no idea what to say. Especially with everyone else in the room staring at him with their eyes full of expectation.

“Cheating on me already, darling?” Magnus asked teasingly, looking down at where Jace and Alec were still holding hands.

Alec panicked and immediately snatched his hand out of Jace’s, holding it against his chest. “This, uh, no, Jace was just- I mean- I- Jace was just joking around,” Alec stammered, feeling like it was necessary for him to defend himself to Magnus and make it explicitly known there was nothing going on between him and Jace.

Magnus chuckled and pulled Alec’s hand towards himself, bending down and placing a kiss on the back, his lips just brushing over Alec’s knuckles.

The blush on Alec’s cheeks would be something the Shadowhunter would deny until his dying breath. Alec hated how little control he had over his body when it came to Magnus.

“It’s a pleasure to see you again, Alexander. I hope this is the beginning of many meetings.”

“Uh, yeah,” Alec muttered, uncomfortable with how fast his heart was beating and realising how much he actually liked Magnus holding his hand.

“Okay!” Jace said loudly, grabbing everyone’s attention. “Now that Magnus is here, maybe he can help us make sense of this.”

Magnus winked at Alec and let go of his hand before walking up to the maps table, naturally filling the empty space beside Alec. The simple brushing of their shoulders had Alec’s heart speed up again and he swallowed the lump of saliva stuck in his throat, hoping it would help somewhat. It did not.

Alec took in a deep breath, trying to calm his heart that was slamming against his ribcage. Alec had heard about soulmate bonds but he never expected this, never expected the pull to be so strong. He never expected how much he would want Magnus, even though all his logic told him he couldn’t have Magnus. This was only the second time Alec had seen Magnus and somewhere deep inside Alec’s mind, all the way in the back, he felt like he had some claim on Magnus, like the warlock naturally belonged to him. But Alec would continue to deny it.

Magnus wasn’t Alec’s. Alec wasn’t Magnus’.

Alec turned back around, ignoring a second brushing of their shoulders, and kept his eyes trained on the map, fingers gripping tightly onto the edge of the table.

“Demons running rampant and one pentagram,” Magnus studied as he looked at the information presented in front of him. “Looks like daddy is out here having some fun.”

“Magnus,” Jace said firmly, giving the warlock a serious look.

Magnus rolled his eyes and got rid of his amused smirk, settling into a serious expression. “Look, I don’t know what my father is up to. We don’t exactly keep in contact. The last time I talked to him was 400 years ago.”

“What is he capable of doing?” Clary asked.

“Anything. He’s a Prince of Hell. Heck, he’s the most powerful Prince of Hell. He rules over Edom and keeps all those demons in check. Well, as best he can, I guess. Asmodeus will use any means to get what he wants. If he doesn’t, he destroys.”

“So, he’ll destroy New York?” Isabelle asked, concerned.

“He hasn’t done much, though,” Jace reasoned. “Sent a whole bunch of demons, which we have mostly been able to get rid of. And no casualties. We’ve handled Greater Demons before.”

Magnus tutted, crossing his arms and looking at Jace with disapproval. “Don’t underestimate my father, blondie. He’s stronger than Azazel, Belial and Eligos combined. If you have a death wish, go for it.”

Jace huffed and scowled, crossing his arms just as Magnus did. “Then, what do you recommend we do?”

“Honestly? Nothing.”

Jace furrowed his eyebrows. “We can’t just sit around and do nothing.”

“I think your best option right now is to take care of the demons still in New York and wait to see what my father’s next move is.”

“Magnus is right,” Alec declared, breaking his silence and pretending to not notice the surprised look Magnus was giving him.

“But Alec, we can’t just –”

“Jace, we don’t know what Asmodeus wants and we have absolutely no clues at this point. We will continue as normal with patrols and eradicating the rest of the demons. Hopefully with whatever Asmodeus decides to do next, we will be able to figure out his plan.”

Alec could see Jace wasn’t pleased, being as Jace was the type to run into battle headfirst, without thinking of the best strategy, but his parabatai nodded at him in agreement.

“Okay, we will –”

Alec was interrupted by the blaring red alarms of the Institute, warning the Shadowhunters of the opening of another rift, and most likely the unleashing of a large swarm of demons. Everyone focused on the map as Isabelle quickly tapped away on her tablet, managing to narrow in on the location, before presenting it on the hologram map with another red X.

“Jace, you’re with me. Izzy, you’re with Clary. Get Raj and Underhill to partner up. Simon, you and Magnus stay here. I can’t have you guys in the middle of danger,” Alec ordered, his voice deep and serious as he stepped into his familiar leader role. He ignored the feeling of Magnus’ gaze burning into him as he spoke. “You have two minutes to suit up and grab your weapons. We’ve got demons to kill.”

Alec watched as everyone ran off to prepare themselves for battle before turning around and walking off to grab his own weapons, only to be stopped by Magnus grabbing his wrist.

“You’ll come back, right?” Magnus asked, concern etched into his face.

Alec looked down at Magnus’ hand around his wrist then up at the warlock’s face. “I always come back. I’m a Shadowhunter.”

“I meant…” Magnus sighed. “For me.”

Alec schooled his expression and, as hard as it was, pushed Magnus’ hand off of him, taking a step back. “Magnus, I’m busy. We’ll talk later.”

Alec turned and walked away, trying to ignore the clawing pain in his chest and the image of Magnus’ hurt expression tattooed in his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	3. Where Do We Go From Here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for joining me on this journey. Chapter 3, here we go! I hope you enjoy :)

The moment Alec stepped into the doors of the Institute, sweating and covered in demon ichor, Magnus was on him, checking fervently for any injuries, big or small.

“Magnus, stop,” Alec ordered, using that leader tone again, “I’m fine.”

“One can never be too sure, darling,” Magnus said, his hands naturally finding their way to rest on Alec’s hips. “I would rather check for myself to make sure my soulmate isn’t hurt.”

Alec looked down at Magnus seriously and took a step back from the warlock, his body already rejecting the satisfaction he should be feeling from not being close to Magnus. “I’m tired and covered in demon muck so I’m going to go take a shower. You should go home.”

There was a flash of pain on Magnus’ face before he gave Alec a flirty smile. “What? You’re not going to invite me into the shower with you?”

Alec took in a slow breath and folded his arms in front of his chest. “Magnus, go home. Please.”

Magnus looked away from Alec and sighed before giving the Shadowhunter a pained smile. “Yeah, you’re right. I can tell when I’m not wanted.”

Alec nodded and turned away from the warlock, dropping his arms to his sides, clenching his fists.

What he didn’t see was Magnus trying to reach out to him to stop him from leaving.

Alec stood under the running water, his head hung down, hands flat against the tiled wall, watching as the water coming off him turned black with demon ichor. He closed his eyes and immediately the image of Magnus’ face came into his mind, morphing from images of Magnus smiling and confident to images of Magnus hurt and vulnerable. Alec’s face scrunched as the images played over and over in his mind, the pain in his chest growing again. It was like someone had reached into Alec’s chest, digging their claws into his heart and squeezing as hard as they could. He hit his chest hard multiple times with his fist, more than wanting to reach into his own chest to stop the pain himself. Alec didn’t have the intention of hurting Magnus, but he needed to keep the warlock at an arm’s length, even further if it was possible. The more Magnus invaded his space, the more Alec wanted to keep him there.

Alec thought of the moment when Magnus first touched him, his soft, warm hand on Alec’s cheek. By the Angel, how Alec _loved_ that touch, the way it allowed him to breathe easy, the way it soothed him, the way it gave him a moment of freedom. Just for a second, he was free of all his burdens, free of all his responsibilities, and what Alec wouldn’t give to feel that again. If he had the chance, he would sink into that touch again and let himself go, allowing the touch to envelope him until he was nothing but that touch. For the longest time, Alec felt like there was a deep dark hole in his life and somehow Magnus was that missing puzzle piece, fitting in seamlessly perfect.

It was wrong.

Thinking this way was wrong. Alec shook his head, hitting his fist against the wall. He shouldn’t have been thinking about how much he wanted Magnus, how much he needed Magnus, how much he didn’t want to be without Magnus. They had only met each other twice and already Alec felt like this man was getting under his skin, creeping in, gripping on tight and never letting go. And honestly, as much as Alec needed him to, he didn’t want him to let go.

Alec sighed and finished off his shower routine, shampooing his hair and scrubbing his body clean. He stepped out of the shower, wrapping a navy towel around his hips and leaving his private bathroom.

“Magnus!” Alec exclaimed, frozen in his spot as he discovered the warlock he had been thinking about incessantly standing in his bedroom.

“You should really take better care of your weapons, Alexander,” Magnus casually mentioned, blue sparks flying out of his fingers as they ran up and down Alec’s bow. “There we go, all better.”

Alec stood there, eyes wide, his heart starting up again in his chest. “What in the world are you doing in here?” he snapped.

Magnus put Alec’s bow down on the ottoman at the end of Alec’s bed and looked up at the Shadowhunter. The surprise on his face was evident as he saw Alec half-naked, droplets of water running along the lines of his muscles and toned abdomen. He swallowed the lump of saliva in his throat and coughed. “Damn, now I _really_ wished you would have invited me into the shower.”

“Magnus.” Alec glared at the warlock and folded his arms, which only made Magnus more infatuated with the way Alec’s muscles flexed and moved under his skin. “What do you want?”

“Ah, right!” Magnus said, clapping his hands to break himself out of his ogling of Alec’s body. “I know you told me to leave but I’m not one to follow orders well.” He heard Alec mutter a ‘clearly’ under his breath. “You also said we could talk later and I figured this was as good a time as any. And I fixed any damages on your bow. Jace told me I might be able to get brownie points for that.”

“Oh, thank you,” Alec mumbled, looking away from the warlock and relaxing his stance. “Before we talk, can I at least put some clothes on?”

“Why cover up perfection, darling?” Magnus asked, that familiar flirty smile settling on his face.

“Magnus,” Alec said pointedly, staring the warlock down.

Magnus rolled his eyes. “Alright, fine. Go put on some clothes.”

Alec stood there for a few seconds, expecting Magnus to leave the room but the man didn’t move, his eyes raking over Alec’s body. Alec would deny it again but he was blushing, just slightly.

“Magnus,” Alec repeated, raising his eyebrows.

“Oh, right, sorry, lost myself for a second.” Magnus turned around and faced the dull wall, huffing to himself.

Alec quickly grabbed a pair of underwear, grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt out of his drawers. He glanced over at Magnus to make sure the man wasn’t looking and then slipped into his clean clothes, giving his hair a quick dry with his towel before throwing it onto the bed.

“Okay, what did you want to talk about?” Alec asked, his arms folded again across his chest, this time like a cage to protect himself.

Magnus turned around and took slow steps towards Alec until he was just one step away. He stood there for a few seconds, gazing into Alec’s eyes, studying how blue they were, what stories they told. The blue eyes and black hair combination had always been Magnus’ weakness. He gave Alec a soft smile, lifting his hand to put it against Alec’s cheek.

“I’ve waited so long to meet you,” Magnus whispered.

Seeing the hand, Alec flinched for a moment before instinctively leaning into the touch and closing his eyes. Magnus could see him physically relax, his arms falling to his side. Alec let out a long breath and put his hand over Magnus’ against his cheek.

“I’ve been waiting for you too,” he whispered back, opening his eyes to look into the warlock’s hazel ones.

Magnus turned his hand and interlocked his fingers with Alec’s, bringing their joined hands to his chest, flattening Alec’s hand over the area where his heart was. “I’ve never felt anything like this before.”

Alec unconsciously put his free hand over his own chest, feeling his heart beat in tandem with Magnus’, and sucking in a breath. “Neither have I.”

“You’re so beautiful, Alexander,” Magnus said, causing Alec’s heart to swell in his chest.

Magnus was looking at him with such fondness, such affection, and Alec couldn’t help but fall weak to his advances. He knew it was the bond, he knew it was wrong, but he couldn’t find the strength in himself to push Magnus away. Not when the man was so close to him, he could breathe in that gorgeous scent of sandalwood and lemon. It was like a breath of fresh air.

Magnus pulled his hand away and Alec almost let out a whine at the loss of contact, but he held himself back with the biting of his lip.

“Alexander, I want this. I want us,” Magnus confessed. “But you’re giving me mixed signals.”

Oh, how Alec wanted this. He felt it so deep in his soul and it had been hurting him so much to deny himself of what was meant to be. But he was a Shadowhunter. Magnus was a warlock. It wasn’t something that could work.

“Magnus, I can’t,” Alec said with a strangled voice, looking down at the floor, not willing to see the hurt on Magnus’ face that he knew was there. “I can’t want us.”

“Why?” The strain in Magnus’ voice made Alec’s heart clench.

“Because…”

“Because I’m a Downworlder?” Magnus asked, tone accusatory. “Is that what it is?”

Alec looked up in alarm and shook his head. “No, it’s not that. It’s just –”

“It is, isn’t it?”

“I –”

“Be honest with me, Alexander.”

Alec sighed. “It’s just… Magnus, you’re a warlock. You’re of demon blood. The Clave, my parents, they wouldn’t approve of this, of us. I have aspirations and a family reputation to uphold. I can’t be with a warlock.”

“You told me you’ve been waiting for me. Are all those things really more important than what we have? I know you feel what I feel, Alexander.”

“You don’t understand. If you were a Shadowhunter, then we could probably make this work.”

Magnus scoffed. “I understand completely. It may be the twenty-first century, but I see that the Clave is still brainwashing their young Shadowhunters.”

“It’s just the way things are.”

“Things change, Alexander,” Magnus stressed. “But clearly the Clave hasn’t caught up with the times, and neither have you.”

Alec furrowed his eyebrows. “What are you talking about? Jace has a vampire for a soulmate and I’m okay with that.”

Magnus let out a sarcastic laugh. “Just because you’re ‘okay’ with something, doesn’t mean you’re supporting it. You’re just tolerating it, Alexander. You accept that vampire because he is your parabatai’s soulmate. But when it comes down to it, would you ever defend that vampire from the Clave? From your parents? From anyone who thinks that those two being together is so inherently wrong?”

Alec opened his mouth to defend himself, but closed it when he realised he had no answer.

“That’s what I thought,” Magnus continued. “Being tolerant of Downworlders is what the Clave have been teaching their Shadowhunters for years. I was hoping that you would be different. Maybe it was wrong of me to come here. I thought maybe we had a chance, but I can see that’s not true.”

“Magnus –”

“No,” Magnus said, putting up his hand, not wanting to hear what Alec had to say. “I’ve been waiting 400 years to meet my soulmate, to fall in love with the right person and spend the rest of eternity with them. But I guess not everyone gets a happy ending.”

“I –”

“An old friend of mine used to say, ‘love is a dreadful bond, yet, so easily severed’. Fortunately for me, I won’t have to experience it.”

Alec could literally feel his heart crack. “I don’t know what to do, Magnus.”

“Neither do I.” Magnus sighed and turned around to leave, only to be stopped by Alec grabbing onto his arm.

“Magnus, please,” Alec pleaded, unsure of what he was even asking for, but he knew he couldn’t let the warlock leave like this.

Magnus pushed Alec’s hand away from him and glanced over his shoulder at Alec. “Don’t make this harder than it has to be, Alexander.”

“Magnus, please,” Alec repeated, more desperate this time. “Give me a chance to think about it.”

Magnus hung his head, pinching the bridge of his nose, letting out a heavy breath, before turning around to face Alec. “If you have to think about it then this soulmate bond must not mean that much to you.”

“Magnus, please,” Alec begged again, unable to control the next words coming out of his mouth. “I don’t want to lose you.”

“That’s not what you were saying before.”

“Please.”

Magnus sighed and closed his eyes, thinking about what he wanted to do. When he opened them, his hand went to Alec’s cheek again. A smile grew on his face when he felt Alec lean into the touch, warming his heart.

“Okay, I’ll give you time to think about it. We’re soulmates, Alexander, but if you keep pushing me away, I’m going to stop trying to hold on. I may be a powerful, immortal warlock, but there’s only so much I can take.”

Alec gave the warlock a genuine smile. “Thank you, Magnus.”

Alec took Magnus’ hand against his cheek into his own, rubbing his thumb over Magnus’ knuckles and smiling to himself at how right this felt. He looked down at their hands joined together and he couldn’t help but feel genuinely happy for the first time in what felt like a long time. He allowed himself this one moment. This one moment of touching Magnus, of breathing in Magnus’ scent, of feeling Magnus close to him. It was just one moment but to Alec it meant more than anything in the world. The world melted away and it was just him and Magnus. Alec found so much peace in that.

Alec knew what they had between them was wrong, but deep down he knew it was so _right_.

It didn’t matter what his logic was telling him, Alec couldn’t give this up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	4. Closing In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4 here we go! I hope you enjoy :)
> 
> Dont get your hopes up with this chapter guys lol theres still roughly 54K words of the story left to go ✌

“You must really be out of it if you’re letting me beat you this easily, brother,” Isabelle panted, holding Alec down on his knees with a wooden stick on his shoulder and another against his neck.

Alec huffed and lifted his arms, pushing Isabelle’s sticks away from him, and jumping to his feet. “I’m fine,” he muttered, holding up his stick, ready for an attack. “Come on.”

Isabelle smirked and twisted her body, her leg aiming to hit Alec’s head. Alec immediately leaned back, managing to slightly dodge Isabelle’s kick, lifting his right arm and aiming to hit her torso with his stick, only to be stopped by one of Isabelle’s sticks. Isabelle brought her other stick down and swiped at Alec’s legs. Alec easily jumped over the stick, smiling smugly at his sister. Isabelle arched her eyebrows and brough a stick down on his back, forcing Alec to fall face-first onto the training mat with a groan.

“See?” Isabelle said, bringing her other stick straight down beside Alec’s head, tilting her own head as she looked down at him with a snicker. “Distracted.”

Alec turned his head and rolled his eyes at her before standing up and dusting himself off. “I’m not distracted. I’m just –”

“Thinking about how gorgeous Magnus is?” Isabelle interrupted, grinning at her brother.

“What? No!” Alec denied, a light blush in his cheeks.

Isabelle giggled. “Your body betrays you, brother.”

“There’s nothing going on between me and Magnus, and there never will be.”

Isabelle’s smile immediately fell. “Alec, he’s your soulmate.”

“It doesn’t matter. We can’t be together.”

“You can’t just disregard the bond you have with each other. You can’t deny yourself of this.”

“I’ll deal with it, I’ll be fine.” The pang in Alec’s chest came back, this time with a burning sensation. Alec grimaced and his face twitched at feeling the pain grow.

“It hurts, doesn’t it? Every time you deny it,” Isabelle asked, not at all surprised or concerned.

Alec looked at her with one eye open, rubbing at his chest, even though he knew the pain wasn’t going away any time soon.

“The more you deny the bond, the more it’s going to hurt,” Isabelle continued. “I don’t want to see you go down that path, Alec.”

“I don’t know what to do, Izzy.”

Isabelle sighed and stepped closer to her brother. “Alec, for the majority of your life, you’ve spent all your time caring for others and putting yourself on the backburner. You practically raised me and Jace because our parents were always away. You cooked for us, took care of us when we were sick, read us bedtime stories. You did everything for us. But you never took care of yourself. Don’t worry about the Clave, our parents, your responsibilities. What is it that _you_ want, Alec?”

“I…” Alec started, closing his eyes to think about it. But he already knew what his answer was going to be. He didn’t need to think about it at all, but he was scared to admit it. “I want _him_.”

Isabelle gave her brother a warm smile and put a supportive hand on his shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “I’m so proud of you for admitting that. If you want him, you shouldn’t deny yourself that.”

Alec sighed in relief when the pain in his chest eased up just a bit. “But he’s a warlock. His father is the most powerful Prince of Hell. It wouldn’t be right for me to be with him.”

“You know, people never approved of me and Clary,” Isabelle confessed.

“What do you mean?” Alec asked, tilting his head.

“Sure, now, people love clary. She helped save the world so everyone loves her and thinks I’m the luckiest girl in the world to have a hero as a soulmate. But in the beginning, people only saw her as Valentine’s daughter, a threat to the peace, a pawn in Valentine’s evil plans. I didn’t care about any of that. I just saw Clary and I wanted Clary, but I knew what people were whispering behind my back and it was scary to want someone no one seemed to approve of.”

Alec frowned. “I’m so sorry, Izzy. I didn’t know you were going through that.”

Isabelle waved a dismissive hand at her brother. “In the end, I couldn’t deny what I was feeling about her. It didn’t matter what people were thinking or who Clary’s father was. The only thing that matter was who Clary was.” A smile grew on Isabelle’s face. “She may be stubborn and thick-headed at time, always running face first into danger, but I love her because of all those things. She knows how to handle me and keeps me grounded. When I’m with her, I feel like I’m home.”

Alec smiled at his sister, seeing the happiness roll off of her when she spoke of her love for Clary. He wanted that. He wanted that so desperately.

Magnus had come by the Institute a few times in the past week, saying that he was there to help with the Asmodeus issue, but Alec knew it was to see him. There weren’t many words exchanged between them but when they did speak, Alec couldn’t control the overwhelming feeling of affection that seemed to overtake his body. It was all instinctive, but Alec gave into every touch, every glance, every smile. As much as he tried to deny it, he wanted to. And every time he did, the pain in his chest eased a little bit more.

There were so many longing looks and glances, brushing of shoulders and lingering touches, secret smiles and blushing cheeks. Alec treasured each moment. He had expected Magnus to invade his space with big romantic gestures and incessant flirting. But every time Magnus was at the Institute, pretending to be of some assistance when they didn’t need any, he gave Alec plenty of space – honestly, Alec thought of it as a little too much space. Maybe it was because they had more pressing matters to attend to and Magnus didn’t want to distract Alec. Maybe it was because Magnus had agreed to give him time to think about what he wanted, which also apparently meant to give him space. Maybe it was because Magnus had respected that Alec didn’t want the other Shadowhunters finding out about his soulmate bond. Whatever it was, Magnus was not who Alec had originally thought. He wasn’t an all-powerful, entitled warlock. He was patient, kind, loyal and respectful. All qualities Alec treasured in the people closest to him.

In the moments when Alec and Magnus would lock eyes, Alec’s heart would always speed up at seeing Magnus look at him so tenderly, like he was trying to convey how much he cared with that one look. When those lingering touches stayed longer than they should have, Alec always felt his body relax and suddenly it was easier to breathe, like Magnus had a way of naturally calming him. Being who Alec was and the position he was in as the stand-in Head of the Institute, Alec held onto a lot of stress, having to worry about his family and every Shadowhunter under his command. But Magnus was always there, as a silent support and person to lean on, even if all he did was give Alec short moments of peace during his long days.

“What am I supposed to tell mum and dad?” Alec asked, frowning at his sister.

“They’ll come around,” Isabelle assured him.

“They aren’t going to like Magnus.”

“Alec, you’ve always been the perfect child, the perfect son. It’s time for you to make a mistake or two.”

Alec snorted. “What? So, you can take my spot as the family favourite?”

Isabelle laughed. “Exactly! Max is very young and Jace has always been… well, Jace. If you become a screw up too, I’ll finally get to take my place on the family pedestal.”

Alec laughed and shook his head. “You’re unbelievable, Izzy.”

“I know, but you love me anyway.” Isabelle smiled at her brother and pulled him in for a hug. “I know you’re trying to fight it, but I think Magnus is good for you, Alec. Give him a chance.”

“Yeah, I really want to,” Alec sighed, wrapping his arms around Isabelle. “Thanks.”

“Any time, big brother.”

Everyone was crowded around the maps table in the Ops Centre, studying the location of the second demon attack. The last few days of investigating the second attack by Asmodeus and fighting off the remaining demons hadn’t been easy, even with the amount of Shadowhunters that were available in New York. Just like the first attack, a rift was opened from Edom, letting in a large number of various types of demons. The only thing left at the site was an image of Asmodeus’ pentagram drawn into the sand.

Magnus had volunteered to close the rift, though, it took a significant amount of his magic to do it and Alec felt guilty for making the warlock feel like it was something he was obligated to do. Magnus reassured Alec that he wasn’t doing this because he was Alec’s soulmate, he was doing it to protect New York. Despite that, Alec still felt guilty but he tried to not let it show. He didn’t want to be someone who just ‘used’ Magnus, like how the Clave ‘used’ warlocks.

It felt wrong.

After all these years, Alec couldn’t believe it took him this long to realise how discriminatory the Clave had been. The Clave preached equality and peace between the Downworlders and the Nephilim, waving the Accords in everyone’s face, when they would discriminate and oppress Downworlders, targeting them for even the slightest offence. And still to this day, there had been no apology or reparations from the Clave for wars past, where many Downworlders were attacked and killed. The Clave continued to use Downworlders without so much of a ‘thank you’ or an ounce of respect. Warlocks were used for their magic, vampires and werewolves for their special physical abilities and as informants. On the surface, the Clave seemed great and righteous, but underneath it all, they were anything but.

For so many years, Alec just accepted that this was the way things were. It was what he was taught to believe. He had to recite it so many times: “Sed Lex, Dura Lex”. The Law is Hard but it is the Law. It didn’t matter how hard the law was, Alec believed it could be changed. It needed to be changed.

“No clues. Again,” Jace stated, folding his arms and looking at the pictures of the demons and the pentagram on the screen. “We really don’t have much to go on, guys.”

Alec sighed and shook his head. “As long as the city is safe, we are doing our jobs. What’s the update on the demon hunts?”

“We’ve managed to eradicate most of them,” Clary answered.

“Most of them?” Alec questioned, arching his eyebrows.

“Well, some have found their way into the sewers and that makes them a bit harder to contain,” Isabelle explained.

“I’ve asked for Raphael’s help again and he not-so-kindly agreed,” Simon added.

“Simon, you know, you don’t have to do this,” Alec insisted, feeling the need to project his guilt about Magnus onto the next Downworlder he saw.

Simon shook his head and smiled. “If it’s to help you guys and save New York, I’m happy to do anything.”

“Thank you,” Alec said, not noticing the way Simon’s eyes widened and how he squeezed Jace’s arm in excitement.

“Well then, Magnus, what do you propose we do?” Jace asked as everyone’s head turned in Magnus’ direction.

Magnus hummed and lifted his head, staying in his thinking pose with an arm across his stomach and his other fingers resting on his chin. His eyes darted between all the faces looking at him before landing on Alec.

“Nothing,” he said simply.

“Nothing? Again?” Jace asked, the irritation growing inside him. “You can’t expect us to sit around and do nothing. Again.”

“We don’t know what he wants and we have no way of finding it out,” Magnus explained. “I know my father. These last two attacks have been easy enough for you to deal with, but this is just the beginning for him. I don’t know what’s coming but we can be prepared by staying alert. And if there’s a third attack, hopefully we can find out more then.”

“Guys, Magnus is right,” Alec declared, holding back from reacting at the smile Magnus was sending him. “The most we can do right now is work to keep the mundanes safe as we always do.”

“I agree with Alec,” Isabelle announced, Clary nodding behind her in aagreement.

Alec sent his sister a small smile of thanks before schooling his expression. “Okay, we continue patrols and missions as normal. If anything changes, I want you to report directly to me. You’re all dismissed.”

Alec could see the twitch in Jace’s face from across the table and gave him a look as if to say ‘sorry’. Jace rolled his eyes and softened, nodding once at Alec before walking away with Simon.

Alec let out a deep breath, leaning forward with his palms on the maps table, as he stared at the red X’s standing out against the hologram. Two attacks so far and no information. Alec had been trying to stay as calm as he could ever since this trouble with Asmodeus started. As a leader, he couldn’t be too emotional or irrational. As a leader, he had to be logical, strategic and patient. It sounded easy, but it wasn’t, especially when he had so many people relying on him and the safety of New York on his shoulders.

It wasn’t that Alec didn’t like his position. No, he loved it. He was so grateful for the opportunity his parents had given him to be the stand-in Head of the Institute when they left for Idris. Leading was what he had always wanted to do. It didn’t mean that it made it easy for him. Sometimes the pressure on his shoulders got too much and Alec just wanted it all to go away, to have a moment of peace where he wouldn’t have to think about all the dangers lurking out there in the shadows.

It wasn’t easy but Alec did the best he could with what he had.

Magnus’ hand on his startled Alec out of his thoughts, turning his head to see the warlock leaning into his personal space. Alec sucked in a breath and saw the corners of Magnus’ mouth twitch for just a second.

“Hey,” Magnus said softly, his thumb rubbing against the back of Alec’s hand.

“Hey,” Alec breathed out, still feeling so weak to Magnus’ advances.

Magnus cupped Alec’s cheek with his free hand, gazing into Alec’s eyes. “Are you okay, Alexander?”

With the touch on his cheek, Alec naturally relaxed and sighed, giving Magnus a smile. “Yeah, I’m okay. This is just… a lot.”

“I’m always here, you know, if you ever want to talk,” Magnus assured. “Or if you need a distraction.”

“Thank you, Magnus.”

“Anything for you.”

It was simple lines like these that had Alec’s legs feeling like they would buckle any second, and he hoped Magnus would catch him.

Magnus reached his hand on Alec’s cheek up and brushed back some of Alec’s hair. The Shadowhunter couldn’t help but sigh and ease into the touch.

“Alexander, how do you expect me to resist you if you’re acting like this?” Magnus asked teasingly, his fingers carding through Alec’s hair one more time.

“I don’t expect you to be doing anything,” Alec replied, tilting his head.

“Does that mean you want me to _not_ resist you?”

A slight blush adorned Alec’s cheek. “I want you to do what you want.”

“Be careful what you wish for, darling,” Magnus joked, his eyes gleaming with mischief.

Alec raised his eyebrows. “Are you dangerous?”

Magnus chuckled lowly before leaning in close to Alec, his lips brushing against Alec’s ear which sent a shiver down the Shadowhunter’s spine. “Very,” he whispered.

Alec’s mouth opened but he had nothing to say, his entire vocabulary disappearing from his mind.

“Close your mouth, darling, or you’ll give a man ideas,” Magnus teased, placing a finger under Alec’s chin and pushing up to close his mouth, before taking a step back from Alec and clasping his hands behind his back. “Alright, that’s enough for today.”

Alec almost let out a whine at the loss of being so close to Magnus. “What- What do you mean?”

“Alexander, I don’t want to overwhelm you.”

“You’re not.”

“I am. But don’t worry, there’s more where all that came from,” Magnus said with a smirk. “I know you’re busy right now so I’ll let you get back to your work. I’ll see you later, okay?”

Alec nodded and smiled. “Yeah, later.”

Magnus grinned and turned around, creating a portal for himself before facing Alec. “Goodbye, Alexander.”

“Goodbye, Magnus.”

Alec watched as Magnus took a step into the portal, glancing over his shoulder one last time with a smile before disappearing. Alec would deny it but he was missing him already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	5. What Are We Waiting For

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 5! A longer one to soothe your souls because the next few will be short-ish :)
> 
> The Count of Monte Cristo is my most favourite book of all time and has been for about 10 years now. It's long and can be a bit dry at times but I highly recommend everyone go read it. I love it so much!
> 
> (also i dream of having my own Mr Darcy ;_____;)
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!

It was another regular night patrol, another night passing by with Asmodeus doing nothing. In general, Asmodeus doing nothing was supposed to be a good thing, but the waiting had Alec all the more nervous. He could only assume that Asmodeus was planning something disastrous and it bothered him that he had no hint as to what was going to happen. His need to protect went hand-in-hand with his need to know every single detail of any situation. Alec always had to be prepared for the unexpected, or worse. If no one else was watching their own backs, Alec would. Not knowing made Alec anxious and he hated it. Shadowhunters weren’t supposed to be anxious.

Jace was walking by his side, twirling his seraph blade around and whistling like he didn’t have a care in the world. Alec never understood how Jace could be so carefree about everything. Though, that could be why he always found himself in seemingly ridiculous or dangerous situations. Jace was cocky and confident, naturally attracting that type of energy, and Alec was always the one to pick up the pieces. Alec loved Jace, he really did. But sometimes, he wanted Jace to sit down and carefully think about his options and make an educated decision. Jace enjoyed the thrill, the adrenaline rush, and Alec knew that. But the thought of losing his parabatai when Alec could’ve saved him by reining him in a little more, it was too much to bear.

Jace would always be Jace, though. And if Alec didn’t let him be himself then he wouldn’t be the Jace that Alec loved.

Alec sighed to himself. He could see Jace looking at him with a cocked eyebrow, asking a silent question, but he ignored it, inwardly groaning at his phone vibrating in his pocket. He pulled out his phone, creasing his brow at the unknown number but decided to pick it up anyway.

“Hello?” he answered the call. “Who’s this?”

“Alexander,” a smooth voice on the other end replied, causing Alec’s heart to start up in his chest. He really needed to learn how to control that.

“Magnus,” Alec said, turning away from Jace and his amused face at finding out who was on the other end of the call. “How did you get my number?”

“Isabelle graciously gave it to me. Sweet girl,” Magnus commented, his voice sincere. “Are you busy right now?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m busy. I’m on patrol with Jace. Did you need something?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to grab a drink right now.”

A date. Magnus was asking Alec on date, in the middle of the night, in the middle of his patrol. Alec could feel it in his bones how much he wanted to say ‘yes’ to the invitation. He would drop everything at a moment’s notice to see Magnus if he could. It was strange how much power Alec allowed this warlock to have over him, despite not being sure about what he even wanted with Magnus. The man had a pull to him and as much as Alec knew it was wrong, he allowed himself to be drawn in, weak for those beautiful eyes and melodious voice.

But right now, Alec had a job to do.

“Oh, um, sorry, I’m busy,” Alec replied.

“No, he’s n –” Alec whipped around and slapped a hand over Jace’s mouth, glaring at him before slowly removing his hand.

“Yeah, sorry, busy. Maybe another time.”

“That’s too bad.” Alec could hear the disappointment in Magnus’ voice and the urge to change his mind was so strong, but he didn’t give in. “I’ll see you soon then.”

“Soon,” Alec repeated, like he was making a promise. “Soon is good.”

“Good night, Alexander,” Magnus said, and Alec could hear the smile in his voice.

“Good night, Magnus.”

Alec hung up and pocketed his phone, letting out a heavy breath. It was only then he could feel how warm his cheeks were and how tight his chest was. He was grateful for the dark street because if Jace could see how pink his cheeks were, his parabatai would never let him live it down. Alec could feel the happiness bubbling inside him just under the surface from hearing Magnus’ voice. He tried to ignore it, ignore all the natural feelings that were developing inside him for Magnus. He attributed all the feelings to the soulmate bond. It was the bond pulling them together and not what Alec actually felt.

Alec kept repeating that to himself, like a mantra, but he knew deep in the dark recesses of his mind, he liked Magnus. He couldn’t be sure that it was romantic feelings but there was definitely something there. Magnus was different from anyone Alec ever met and befriended – most of his friends being Shadowhunters and essentially his colleagues. Shadowhunters were friendly but their duty came first. They followed protocol and never strayed from the path put in front of them. Magnus was the complete opposite. He enjoyed living and lived to enjoy. He made his own rules and did what he liked because he wanted to. He presented himself how he wanted, never ashamed of who he was, despite what people said. Alec saw Magnus as the embodiment of freedom and he wanted some of that freedom for himself.

“You should go see him,” Jace mentioned casually as they continued walking down the street, strapping his seraph blade to his hip.

“I’m on the job,” Alec stated, standing up straighter and looking forward.

Jace scoffed. “You know I can handle this myself. It’s a quiet night and our shift is almost over. Your boyfriend wants to see you.”

“He is _not_ my boyfriend,” Alec denied adamantly. “We’re supposed to do patrols in pairs for a reason.”

“The way you guys make goo-goo eyes at each other definitely makes it seem like you guys are boyfriends.”

“What?” Alec snapped, scowling at Jace. “We don’t do that. _I_ don’t do that.”

Jace let out a full-bellied laugh. “Alec, I’m your parabatai. Seeing and feeling you start to like someone romantically is really entertaining.”

“Jace, I am not your entertainment,” Alec said, unamused and slightly offended. “I don’t like Magnus. Not like that. He’s a… friend.”

‘Friend’ definitely wasn’t the right word but it was the only word Alec could come up with to define his relationship with Magnus.

“A really _close_ friend?” Jace asked teasingly, pumping his eyebrows twice.

Alec rolled his eyes. “He’s just a friend. Like how he’s your friend and Izzy’s friend and Clary’s friend and Simon’s friend.”

“Right, cause friends just casually invite you over in the middle of the night.”

“Yeah, friends do that,” Alec said, nodding, sure of himself, before stopping in his steps and looking at Jace. “Don’t they?”

“Alec, there’s only one reason someone invites you over in the middle of the night. It’s a booty call.”

“Oh, okay,” Alec replied, letting his brain register what a booty call was before continuing, feeling more dejected than he did before. “Oh, _oh_. Oh.”

Jace furrowed his eyebrows and placed his hand on Alec’s shoulder. “Hey, I didn’t mean it like that. Magnus would never do that, especially not to you.”

“Who knows?” Alec asked, shrugging, trying to pretend the thought didn’t bother him. “Maybe that’s what he wants from me.”

Jace squeezed Alec’s shoulder and forced the tall Shadowhunter to look at him. “Look, you aren’t someone who could ever be treated as just a booty call. You know Magnus better than this. He’s your soulmate and he wants to see you.”

Alec huffed and turned away from Jace, shrugging off his hand. “It doesn’t matter. We’re working right now.”

“Alec –”

Jace was interrupted by Alec pulling his phone out of his pocket again, an unknown number flashing on the screen. He raised his eyebrows and jerked his chin at the phone, urging Alec to pick it up.

“Hello?” Alec greeted, slightly annoyed.

“Are you not happy to hear from me, darling?” Magnus asked, playfully.

“Magnus,” Alec said, his voice softening and his body instinctively relaxing, the irritation easily melting away.

“Alexander, I spoke with your sister again and –”

“You speak with my sister a lot.”

“Yes, well, I want to know how to woo you and Jace can be kind of annoying.”

Alec choked on his saliva and started having a coughing fit, hitting at his chest with his fist.

“Alexander, are you okay?” Magnus asked, concerned and slightly panicked.

“I- Yeah, I’m okay,” Alec rasped, coughing one more time before taking a deep breath. “Sorry, you want to know how to what?”

Magnus chuckled. “I want to know how to woo you,” he repeated, enunciating the last two words.

“Oh, okay,” was all Alec managed to say. Flirting was not exactly Alec’s strong suit.

“As I was saying before, I have been informed that your shift ends soon and I was wondering if you would like to come over.”

“For drinks?”

“Anything you want.”

“Right now?”

“Yes, Alexander, right now.” Magnus paused before continuing. “I want to see you.”

Alec felt a fluttering in his chest, the words getting stuck in his throat. “I –”

Alec didn’t even notice Jace swiping Alec’s phone out of his hand until he heard his parabatai speak.

“Hey, Magnus, it’s me. He’ll be there, I’ll make sure of it. Send a text of your address,” Jace said before hanging up and giving Alec back his phone.

Alec has always been a model Shadowhunter, stoic, strict and stuck to the rules. He learned to manage his emotions well and not show them on his face when it was necessary. He never got distracted and always found it easy to focus on the task at hand. He worked hard, trained and disciplined himself to be a good Shadowhunter, and even though he had yet to reach his goal, he knew who he was. Alec was the perfect soldier.

But the moment Magnus entered his life, it was like all his years of training flew out the window. He was still a good Shadowhunter, working hard to prove himself. However, when it came to Magnus, he couldn’t control how his body would react to the warlock. Magnus would be so confident, giving Alec small, scattered compliments, and Alec could feel how his insides would just melt at any single thing Magnus said. Magnus made him so flustered and there was a range of feelings conjuring up inside his body each time they spoke or saw each other. Alec never had training for this. He didn’t know how he was supposed to deal with this situation.

Jace hit Alec on the back, breaking him out of his thoughts, grinning up at Alec, feeling immensely proud of himself. Alec glared at his parabatai, his hand itching to slap that smile right off Jace’s face.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Jace said, rolling his eyes. “You’ll thank me later.”

“Jace,” Alec groaned, very much exasperated.

Jace folded his arms across his chest and looked at Alec seriously for once. “Alec, don’t deny yourself this. I know you want to see him but you keep rejecting everything you feel. For once, forget about being a Shadowhunter and do something that _you_ want to do. I love you too much to see you throw this away.”

“Jace, I c –”

“Don’t,” Jace interjected. “Don’t say it. If you’re not going to do this for you, at least do it for me.”

It was rare to see Jace like this, so serious and genuine, setting Alec straight. Usually, it was the other way around, with Alec reprimanding Jace and praying he would listen. It was moments like these when Alec appreciated having Jace in his life because Jace always knew the right thing to say when Alec needed it. They’d been connected for so long but Alec was still surprised at how much Jace understood him. Even though they were complete opposites, they found the right ways to complement each other.

Alec looked at Jace then down at his phone, a small blue light flashing to indicate a new notification. He slowly swiped his phone to unlock it and then saw a message from an unknown number and assumed it had to be Magnus. He took a deep breath and opened the message. It was a regular message with an address attached. But the part that had a smile growing on his face was Magnus’ simple ‘I can’t wait to see you’.

That one phrase had Alec’s heart soaring into the night sky.

“You should see your face right now,” Jace joked, a smug smile on his face.

“Shut up,” Alec muttered, pocketing his phone, the smile unable to leave his lips. “I guess, I should go.”

“Yes, yes, go on,” Jace encouraged, making a shoo-ing motion with his hands. “I hope you two lovebirds have fun!”

Alec rolled his eyes at his parabatai and spun around, taking a few steps down the street before pausing and turning back around.

“Hey, Jace?” Alec called. “Um…”

“Alec, I know,” Jace said, slightly annoyed but his smile told differently. “You can thank me later.”

Alec grinned at Jace and nodded before turning and running off into the night.

Alec was nervous. He never got nervous. Not about things like this. But he never had to deal with things like this. It was strange.

Slight shivers ran through his body as the butterflies in stomach fluttered harder. It wasn’t a cold night but the hairs on his arms and the back of his neck were standing. He took a few deep breaths to calm the beating of his heart as he stared at the door to the penthouse apartment before him. Alec didn’t know why he had to be nervous about this. It was just Magnus. _Just Magnus_ , he reminded himself for what felt like the billionth time. _Just Magnus_.

Alec took in one more slow breath and held it, lifting his fist up to knock at the door. He knocked three times, slow and hard, and immediately the door opened wide for him to enter. He let out the breath he was holding and ducked his head, stepping through the doorway. When the door closed behind him on its own, Alec lifted his head and was immediately in awe by Magnus’ apartment.

It was large and spacious, filled with modern furniture, books upon books on shelves, historical pieces of décor scattered throughout, and various types of trinkets and decorative bowls to give the space some character. The apartment was very _Magnus_ , the way it seemed to marry the old with the new.

Alec was immediately drawn to the bookshelves along the wall, his fingers slowly running over the old leather and cloth bound spines of books he hadn’t even heard of and some that he had. Alec didn’t even realise the smile on his face as he made his way down the shelves, admiring the colours and different editions of books he discovered. He immediately stopped in his tracks when he saw a familiar title, his fingers unable to stop themselves from carefully pulling the book out of the shelf with excitement.

It was bound in full contemporary brown calf with gilt ruled to the front and rear panels. There was tooling to the spine in the image of what looked like flowers surrounding the gilt title of the book. All the gold stood out so beautifully in contrast to the brown cover and yellowing pages. Alec’s fingers ghosted over the title as his eyes read it over and over again. ‘The Count of Monte-Christo’, it read. In the centre of the spine it read, ‘Dumas. Vol. I’, and further down, ‘Lond. 1846’. _By the Angel._ Alec couldn’t believe his eyes. It was a first edition.

Alec couldn’t describe the emotions he was feeling, everything bombarding him at once. Surprise, excitement, joy, elation, euphoria. All of it and more. The ecstasy of holding the first edition of his favourite book in his hands was more than anything he could comprehend. Alec’s eyes quickly flicked back to the bookshelf to see the second volume sitting there, as if waiting for him to admire it too.

“All human wisdom is contained in these two words,” Alec heard a low voice quote, but he was too enamoured by the book in his hands to look up.

“Wait and hope,” Alec finished breathlessly, hugging the book against his chest.

The voice chuckling got Alec’s attention and had him immediately spinning in the direction of the sound, eyes widening when he saw Magnus.

By the Angel, Magnus looked beautiful. He was leaning against the doorway to the living room, arms folded across his chest, one leg crossed in front of the other, head tilted as he admired Alec. A long burgundy silk robe adorned his body, covering up his tan skin and navy pyjama pants. His hair was still styled in a quiff but his face was void of any makeup, making him look younger and his eyes less defined. Alec thought Magnus looked beautiful like this, comfortable and more of himself.

“Magnus, hi,” Alec greeted, sending the warlock a small smile. “Sorry, I got distracted.”

“Quite alright, darling. I’m glad you’re here,” Magnus said as he strode over to Alec, tucking a loose strand of hair behind Alec’s ear. “Watching you fall in love with that book is a bonus for me.”

Alec quickly looked down at the book in his arms, his smile growing wider on his face, before looking back up at Magnus. “Yeah, it’s a favourite.”

“You can have it if you want. The second volume too,” Magnus offered with a sincere smile.

“What? Magnus, no,” Alec refused, shaking his head. “This is a first edition. I can’t just take it.”

“Alexander, I want you to have it.”

Alec shook his head again and returned the book to the shelf before facing Magnus again. “I know how rare and special these are. I can’t take them from you.”

“You’re sweet,” Magnus said softly before turning around and walking into the living room, glancing over his shoulder and smirking at Alec. “Come on, Shadowhunter. I won’t bite.”

Alec stared at Magnus’ broad back as he walked away, biting his lip, letting out a heavy breath as Magnus disappeared into the room. It was always the tiniest things that Magnus did that got Alec so worked up. Alec turned his head and took one last longing look at the first edition of his favourite book before stepping away from the bookshelves and following after Magnus into the living room.

“Drink?” Magnus asked as Alec entered, his back turned as he was mixing martinis.

“Uh, sure,” Alec replied, thinking it would be rude to refuse.

“Perfect,” Magnus said as he twirled around with two drinks in his hands, giving one to Alec while he sipped on the other and sighing in satisfaction.

Alec took the drink and eyed it warily before taking a sip, scrunching his face at the bitter taste of the alcohol “It’s great.”

Magnus let out a small laugh and took the drink out of Alec’s hand, placing it on the bar cart behind him. “There’s no need to lie to me, Alexander.”

“Sorry,” Alec muttered, his eyes glancing around Magnus’ living room. “Why did you ask me here?”

Magnus took another sip of his drink and arched an eyebrow at Alec. “I thought I told you. I wanted to see you.”

Alec looked at Magnus and tilted his head. “Why?”

“Because you’re my soulmate.”

“Oh, okay.”

“You sound disappointed, Alexander,” Magnus teased.

“I’m not,” Alec replied, knowing how unbelievable he sounded.

“Ah, lips that say one thing, while the heart thinks another.”

“Did you just quote Alexandre Dumas at me again?”

Magnus chuckled and downed the rest of his drink, putting the empty cup on the bar cart before making his way over to Alec, taking the Shadowhunter’s hand into his own, placing a soft kiss to the back of the hand.

“Alexander, I wanted to see you because I wanted to see you, that’s all,” Magnus said, his voice genuine. “I like to think that you wanted to see me too.”

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

“Oh, so it wasn’t just Jace being intolerable?”

“Jace is… Jace. I came because I wanted to.”

Magnus smiled so fondly and Alec could feel his insides melt. “You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire you.”

“Mr Darcy?”

“I’m surprised you picked up on that,” Magnus laughed.

“I’m ashamed you misquoted Jane Austen,” Alec said, shaking his head in feigned disappointment. “Does that make me Elizabeth Bennet?”

“Do you want to be?” Magnus asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Maybe.”

Magnus stepped in closer to Alec, their chests almost touching. “You shouldn’t tempt me, Alexander. I may just steal you away.”

Alec swallowed and looked down at Magnus, his heart hammering against his ribcage. “It wouldn’t be stealing if I let you.”

“My, my, Mr Lightwood, flirting with a warlock. Whatever will people think?” Magnus joked, his tongue darting out to lick his lips.

Alec’s eyes followed the action, staying stuck on the way Magnus’ pink lips shined and how plumped they looked. They were standing so close that Alec could feel Magnus’ warm breath on him and it sent shivers down his spine. If he chose to, he could push forward and capture Magnus’ lips to confirm his thoughts about how soft he imagined those lips to be. He could pull Magnus closer and breathe the man in, feel him as close as possible. He could wrap his arms around the warlock and give Magnus all the power he was trying to hold onto to hold himself back. Magnus’ tongue darted out again and Alec sucked in a breath, his eyes never leaving Magnus’ lips.

“Alexander,” Magnus whispered, and it had Alec letting out the breath he was holding, his legs almost buckling beneath him.

But he couldn’t want Magnus like this. It was wrong to want Magnus like this.

Alec took a step back from Magnus and shook his head to clear the haze. “Magnus, I’m sorry. I can’t.”

There was a flash of pain on Magnus’ face and then it was gone, a well-practiced smile settling instead. “It’s okay, Alexander. I don’t want to push you.”

“It’s just that _this_ is a lot. You’re… a lot.”

“I know.”

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s no need to apologise, darling. I understand.”

Alec shook his head. “I’m sorry I don’t know what I want.”

“Oh, Alexander,” Magnus said, his voice filled with pity. “You know what you want, but it’s what everyone else expects from you that is holding you back. I just hope when you make your decision, you make it for you.”

“I’m sorry,” Alec repeated, looking down and rubbing his arm.

Magnus stepped forward and lifted Alec’s head, smiling sweetly at him. “Don’t apologise. If it will make it any easier, I promise I won’t kiss you until you decide I can.”

Alec let out a small laugh. “What if I kiss you first?”

Magnus raised his eyebrows in surprise. “I’m not going to stop you.”

Without a word, Alec reached a hand up, hesitating for a second or two before resting against Magnus’ cheek, running his thumb along Magnus’ cheekbone. He heard Magnus suck in a breath and smiled, proud to know that he had some sort of an affect on the warlock and it wasn’t just the other way around. He moved his thumb again and felt Magnus’ cheeks grow warmer, a dusting of pink against tan skin.

He could feel it again, the want, the need to be close to Magnus, to feel him against his body. But he knew it wasn’t right. It wasn’t right to do something like this and lead Magnus on when Alec didn’t even know what he wanted. It wasn’t right for things to progress if Alec couldn’t even bear the thought of disappointing his family.

By the Angel, Alec wanted Magnus. He felt it so deeply.

But he couldn’t.

Alec snatched his hand away abruptly and stepped away from Magnus, clenching his fists to resist touching Magnus again.

“I’m sorry,” he apologised again, his nails digging into his palms. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Alexan –”

“I should go home.”

“It’s late. You can stay here.”

Alec shook his head. “No. I- I need to leave.”

“Alexander…”

“Please, Magnus.”

Magnus sighed and nodded, giving Alec a strained smile.

“I’m sorry,” Alec repeated.

“It doesn’t make it any easier but I do understand,” Magnus forgave. “It’s okay. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

The corners of Alec’s lips curled into a small smile. “Yeah, soon,” he agreed, reiterating the promise he made earlier that evening.

“Good night, Alexander.”

“Good night, Magnus.”

Alec left Magnus’ apartment, turning back one last time to see Magnus watching him leave with a smile but there was pain in his eyes, and Alec had to resist the temptation to march up to Magnus and kiss the pain away.

When he got into bed that night, he noticed two books sitting on his bedside table, the gold of the gilding on the spine glistening under his table lamp. Alec smiled as the guilt he was feeling dissipated. He turned off the lamp, falling asleep and dreaming of sword fights and a pair of golden cat eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	6. Like You Mean It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 6! As mentioned previously, this is a short-ish one but I hope it makes you happy :)
> 
> You will notice I've added how many chapters I believe this fic will have. The number might change but that is the approximation for now.
> 
> Happy reading!

The moment Alec stepped through the doors of the Institute, panting and covered in demon ichor, Magnus was on him like a moth to flame. And this time, Alec didn’t push him away, silently pleased at having the warlock worry over him. He let Magnus do as he liked, feeling the blue sparks of Magnus’ magic against his skin.

“You know, I can just use an iratze,” Alec pointed out, feeling the tiny cut on his cheekbone heal in a manner of seconds.

“I know,” Magnus replied, his fingers tracing down Alec’s arms as he gave Alec a flirtatious look. “But don’t you think this is more intimate?”

Having Magnus be the first person there to greet him when he got back from a mission was heartwarming. Somehow, in the moment, as he watched Magnus move around him, touching him in random places and letting his magic do the work, Alec realised that this was what he wanted each and every time he got back from a mission. He was usually greeted by questions and reports he had to make before retiring to his room and taking care of his scratches and bruises himself. Alec never considered it but after years of taking care of his siblings and people at the Institute, it was so _nice_ to have someone take care of him. And no matter how much Alec protested, Magnus would roll his eyes and continue with attending to Alec.

The affection Alec had for Magnus swelled and he couldn’t control the smile appearing on his face.

“You guys are adorable,” Alec heard Clary say, his head whipping in her direction as he took a step away from Magnus.

Magnus laughed and clicked his fingers, making the demon ichor on Alec disappear, before hooking his arm around Alec’s and grinning at Clary. “Thank you, Biscuit. I like to think so too.”

Alec’s eyes darted to Magnus then back to Clary. “Clary, no- I’m not- We’re not –” he stammered.

“Best to keep it a secret,” Magnus mentioned before whispering, “Alexander’s a little shy.”

Clary giggled and nodded. “Got it,” she whispered back with a wink before skipping away to Isabelle.

“Wait, Clary!” Alec called after her, knowing it was futile. He groaned and glared at Magnus.

“You know, I find it very attractive when you look at me like that,” Magnus teased, and Alec rolled his eyes.

“You’re lucky I like you,” Alec muttered, not really thinking about the words coming out of his mouth.

“Oh?” Magnus raised his eyebrows, a smirk settling on his face. “Good to know.”

Alec groaned again, running a hand over his face. He didn’t know what it was, but Magnus had a way with pulling things out of him. Or maybe it was just because Alec really did like Magnus.

“Come on,” Alec grumbled, letting Magnus keep their arms hooked around each other as they made their way to the Ops Centre.

He could see Magnus smiling beside him out of the corner of his eye and he smiled inwardly, proud to be the one who could make Magnus happy.

As they both entered the Ops Centre, Alec heard a familiar loud gasp and he automatically rolled his eyes.

“Alec, are you cheating on me?” Jace asked, exaggerating each word.

“Don’t be annoying, idiot,” Simon reprimanded, hitting Jace upside the head.

“Hey!” Jace yelled, rubbing the back of his head and pouting at his soulmate.

Alec nodded at Simon as a silent ‘thank you’ and the vampire grinned back at him. He unhooked his arm from Magnus’ and marched up to the maps table, seeing that Isabelle already prepared the hologram map with a new red X marking the location of the recent attack.

“Okay, this is attack number three. Please tell me we have something,” Alec said, looking around at the faces of the people standing around the table.

“The attack was the same as the last two times. A whole lot of demons came through the rift and another pentagram to mark his work,” Isabelle explained, displaying images on the screen. “But we did find something.”

“What?” Alec asked.

“This.” Isabelle tapped on her tablet and sent an image to the screen in front of the group. Under Asmodeus’ pentagram carved into a wall was a message reading, ‘ _I videbo vos cito_ ’.

“I will see you soon,” Magnus translated, stepping up next to Alec and looking concerned.

“What does that mean?” Simon asked.

“He’s coming here,” Jace stated, turning his head to look directly at Magnus. “Isn’t he?”

Magnus furrowed his eyebrows and frowned, looking back down at the map and studying the three red X’s that were marked before lifting his head and looking at Isabelle.

“Isabelle, if you would be so kind to put up a map of New York City on the screen,” Magnus requested and Isabelle easily complied. “Now, put an image of the pentagram on top, no background.”

Everyone watched with bated breath as Magnus’ eyes darted between the map on the screen and hologram map on the table, studying both intensely.

“Magnus,” Alec urged.

It felt like forever, but Magnus finally spoke. “He’s coming,” he confirmed.

“How do you know?”

“Each location an attack has happened so far matches a point of the pentagram. This is just a theory, but if he opens rifts where the other 3 points of the pentagram match, he will be creating his own pentagram to summon himself to Earth.”

“How is that even possible?” Clary asked.

“It’s an extremely rare occurrence and only something that can be done by someone as powerful as a Prince of Hell.”

“And Asmodeus is the most powerful one of them all,” Jace grumbled, bringing a fist down onto the maps table.

“What does he want?” Isabelle asked.

Magnus sighed heavily and shook his head. “I don’t know.”

Alec placed a hand on Magnus’ lower back, hoping to ease some of the guilt the warlock was feeling over not having an answer they were looking for. Alec smiled at Magnus and the warlock returned the smile though the guilt still swam in his eyes.

“We still don’t know what Asmodeus is up to, but we know he is coming,” Alec said, leaning on the maps table with his palms. “If Magnus’ theory is correct, we should be able to determine the locations of future attacks and prepare for those attacks. Clary, get Underhill to help you out with finding the locations. Izzy and Jace, I want you guys on weapons. Prepare what you can. We will continue trainings, patrols and smaller missions as normal. I need everyone to stay alert.”

Everyone nodded in understanding.

“You’re all dismissed,” Alec continued. “Go get cleaned up then write up your reports for today’s attack.”

When everyone left, Alec slumped and dragged his fingers through his hair with frustration. He never had to deal with something as dangerous as this and he had a whole team and city relying on him to keep everyone safe. But Asmodeus was a Prince of Hell. Banishing him from Earth wasn’t going to be easy and he didn’t have a clue as to how to do it.

“You’re not alone, Alexander,” Magnus said softly, placing a hand on Alec’s shoulder, like he knew what Alec was thinking. “Don’t take all of this on yourself.”

Alec sighed and looked up at Magnus. “He’s coming here and I don’t know how I’m going to protect everyone.”

Magnus stepped in closer to Alec, carding his fingers through Alec’s hair and massaging his scalp, smiling when he heard Alec sigh in bliss. “It’s not your job to protect everyone. You can only do what you’re capable of doing.”

“But they’re all relying on me.”

“Just because you’re their leader does not mean they are all your responsibility. You can’t take care of everyone, Alexander, and that’s okay.”

Alec stood up straight and turned to face Magnus, hanging his head dejectedly. “Magnus, what do I do?”

“Take care of yourself first,” Magnus answered, gazing at Alec with affection.

“How?”

“Right now, you need a shower and rest.”

Alec thought about it and nodded, the adrenaline from the mission disappearing and the exhaustion seeping into his bones. “Can you come with me?”

Magnus gasped jokingly. “Mr Lightwood, are you inviting me into the shower with you?”

Alec chuckled and shook his head. “Mr Bane, stop having such thoughts in your head. I simply require your presence while I rest.”

“Oh?”

“You help me relax,” Alec said, his cheeks warming. “I like having you next to me.”

“You know, saying things like that can make a man hope.”

Alec’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth to try to explain that wasn’t what he meant, only to be stopped by Magnus putting up his hand.

“It’s okay, Alexander,” Magnus said with a smile. “I like to hope.”

Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus and breathed in the familiar scent of sandalwood and lemon, letting it fill him and ease the tension away. “Thank you,” he mumbled into Magnus’ shoulder.

Magnus put his arms around Alec, one hand on Alec’s lower back and the other at the base of his neck. “I’m always here for you, Alexander. Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	7. Waves of Grey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 7, here we go!
> 
> I know everyone was getting real hopeful with the last few chapters but I'm here to remind you that 'ANGST' is a tag in this fic hahaha but don't worry, you're somewhat safe with this chapter.
> 
> Happy reading everyone!

Alec raised his fist and knocked on the door, opening it when he heard Isabelle’s soft ‘come in’. He saw his sister standing at the end of her bed with a hand on her chin and the other on her hip, studying three different outfits intensely.

“Am I disturbing something?” Alec asked, hesitantly stepping into the room.

Isabelle hummed and turned her head to look at her brother with a smile. “No, it’s fine.”

Alec walked over to Isabelle and stood next to her, looking down at the outfits laid out on the bed. The first one was a simple black bodycon midi dress. The second one was a red low v-cut top with a pair of black skinny jeans. The last one was a white corset top paired with a black mini skirt.

“What are these for?” Alec asked.

“I’ve got date night with Clary,” Isabelle explained. “What do you think?”

“Are you asking me about date night or about the outfits? Cause, Izzy, you know me. I know nothing about fashion.”

Isabelle laughed. “Just tell me what you think I would look nice in.”

“You look nice in everything.”

Isabelle rolled her eyes. “You’re too kind, big brother. If you’re not here to help me choose what to wear, then why are you here?”

“Right, um, I wanted to ask you something,” Alec said, rubbing the back of his neck.

Isabelle cocked a curious eyebrow at her brother before pushing the outfits out of the way and sitting down on the bed, tapping the spot next to her. “What’s up?”

Alec sat down on the bed next to his sister, looking down at his hands as he fiddled with his fingers. “Well, you know how sometimes Clary has to be away for a few days for missions?”

Isabelle hummed and nodded.

“Um… how do you… cope with that?” Alec asked hesitantly, still not looking at his Isabelle.

There was a moment of silence before Isabelle let out a laugh and Alec lifted his head to glare at her.

“Alec, is this about Magnus?” Isabelle asked teasingly.

“No, of course not,” Alec answered almost immediately. “Why would it be about him? I never even mentioned him. This is about Clary.”

Isabelle rolled her eyes and shook her head. “You’re really bad at lying. Is this about Magnus being in London?”

“No, it’s not,” Alec grumbled, looking down at his hands again, and Isabelle could only roll her eyes again.

“Well,” Isabelle started. “Since we’re talking about Clary, I do miss her when she’s away on other missions without me.”

“How do you deal with that? Don’t you get worried something will happen to her?”

“Alec, of course I get worried. I get worried about her as much as I get worried about you or Jace when you guys run off on your missions. I just believe she will come back to me and I think about the things we’re going to do once she comes back.”

“But what if –”

“We live dangerous lives, brother. It’s perfectly normal to worry and miss the people you care about. Do I wish I could be with her on the mission to protect her? Of course, I do. But I’m not, so I’ll do my best here because I know she’s doing her best there. It also helps that she calls me when she gets the chance.”

“But Magnus hasn’t called me,” Alec sighed, sounding disappointed.

“So, this is about Magnus,” Isabelle giggled. “Maybe he’s just busy. I’m sure he’s fine.”

“But what if he’s not?”

Isabelle reached a hand up and stroked her brother’s hair in comfort. “Alec, he’s strong. He will be fine. Believe in him.”

“I do. I just –”

“Miss him. I know. It’s kind of nice to see you fretting over him like this.”

Alec looked at his sister and furrowed his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“It’s been two days since he left and you’re already freaking out. You must be _so_ in love with him,” Isabelle joked.

“What?” Alec spluttered, immediately sitting up straight. “I am _not_ in love with him.”

Isabelle laughed. “Don’t worry, I’m sure he feels the same way about you.”

“Magnus and I are nothing to each other.”

“If he was nothing to you then you wouldn’t be –”

“Hey, Alec, Raj needs you.” Jace’s voice at Isabelle’s door startled the siblings out of their conversation. He popped his head in and grinned. “Am I disturbing something?”

“Poor Alec here misses Magnus,” Isabelle replied with a mocking pout.

“I don’t miss him,” Alec hissed, glaring at Isabelle.

“Oh, okay, that makes sense,” Jace said, nodding. “I was wondering why he was being grouchy to everyone.”

Alec groaned and stood up. “I don’t have to deal with this right now. I’ve got an institute to run.”

Jace rolled his eyes. “It’s perfectly normal to miss your soulmate, Alec.”

“Whatever. Don’t you have a patrol to go on?”

Jace waved a dismissive hand at Alec.

Alec shook his head and made his way to the door before pausing and turning to face Isabelle. “Wear the red top with the jeans,” he said, gesturing with his chin to the clothes laying strewn across her bed.

She grinned at him and nodded. “Thanks.

Alec smiled in return and left the bedroom, hearing Jace call after him with “it’s okay to miss him!”

Okay, maybe Alec did miss him.

Another night spent in the office. Another night spent pouring over reports and filing them to the Clave. Another night passing by with no movement from Asmodeus. Another night without Magnus.

Alec hadn’t seen Magnus for over a week now, the warlock stating that he would be out of town to help his friend, Ragnor Fell, in London with a complication. He finally called Alec once, but it turned out to be a butt dial which made Alec more disappointed than he would have liked to admit. It was strange not having someone by his side constantly, supporting him and taking care of him, talking sense into him when he needed it most. But Alec could have had anyone do that for him if he requested it.

Alec didn’t want to admit it, not even to himself, but he missed Magnus, a lot. Not just what Magnus did for him, but Magnus himself. Alec missed the flirtatious smiles and eyes that would look at him with such longing. He missed the teasing and jokes, but also the moments of vulnerability. He missed the lingering touches and seeing the way Magnus would light up every room he entered. Magnus had such a way about him that caught everyone’s attention and had them simply enthralled by his presence. Alec missed Magnus, and no matter how many times his sister scolded him for being grouchy over the past few days, he still didn’t want to admit it.

It was wrong for Alec to be thinking about Magnus this way. But the man was constantly on his mind, even when he didn’t want him to be. Every thought, every action, somehow had his mind always leading back to the warlock. As hard as Alec tried to control it, focusing on whatever task was at hand, his mind wandered and found itself settling on an image of Magnus or remembering something Magnus said. It bothered Alec to no end. He wanted to let himself think about Magnus but he knew he shouldn’t be. This constant battle between his brain and his heart was putting more pressure on him than he even realised.

Alec winced slightly as he felt a small burst of pain in his chest. He knew what it was. He knew why. Denying himself Magnus kept making it worse and worse. Isabelle had also scolded him about this plenty of times, hating to see her brother in pain. Sometimes Jace would look at Alec with concern or rub at his own chest, feeling the residual pain through the parabatai bond. He never spoke to Alec about it, waiting for Alec to come to him first when he was ready. But Alec knew Jace was worrying about him and how much this denial was hurting him.

People weren’t supposed to reject their soulmates.

Clutching a report in his hand, Alec shook his head, pushing the feeling of pain to the back of his mind and tried to concentrate on the work he had to do. His eyes skimmed over the report, groaning softly at Jace’s terrible handwriting and terrible ability to write a decent report. Before passing Jace’s reports onto the Clave, Alec would usually fix them and make sure they were passable, but tonight he wasn’t in the mood. Alec put the report to the side to deal with later when he had a chance and glanced at the rest of the reports sitting in a tall stack on his desk.

Alec loved his job, he did. And he still had his goals set on becoming Head of the Institute and then moving through the ranks to Inquisitor or Consul. He wanted to watch over his people and fight alongside them, leading them to be better and to create a better future. But the one downside was paperwork. Alec hated paperwork. He thrived on being active, going on missions and finding answers. He was supposed to be out on a mission with Jace to rein in some vampires reported of breaking the Accords, but instead he sent Underhill with Jace and was now sitting in his parents’ office, going over report after report.

A tired and irritated sigh left his mouth as he held his head in between his hands, the pain in his chest still there just underneath the surface. Everything had just been extremely overwhelming lately and, for the first time in Alec’s life, he really thought he could use a break.

“The Head of the Institute should never be sighing like that,” a familiar voice said, pulling Alec out of his thoughts.

Alec lifted his head and immediately stood up, his eyes widening in surprise. “Mother,” he breathed out. “You’re here.”

Maryse Lightwood was a tall, elegant woman with long dark hair that was always styled in a professional manner. She was dressed in a blue high-neck dress that fit tight to her body, reaching just below her knees. Her black heels clicked on the timber floors as she entered the office. Maryse was a natural-born leader, strong in her conviction with her head always held high, never allowing a single thing to faze her. She worked long and hard to get to where she was and she had no intention of letting anyone or anything destroy that.

Maryse strode over to Alec and pulled him into her arms. “It’s so good to see you Alec,” she greeted, patting his back and then pulling back to smile proudly at her son.

“It’s good to see you too, Mother,” Alec said, reiterating the sentiment. “When did you get back?”

“Not too long ago. Your father and Max stayed in Idris. There was some business he had to deal with. How have you been?”

“I’ve been good,” Alec replied, giving his mother a well-practiced smile. “Things have been a little hectic around here but it’s been good.”

Maryse eyed her son warily but decided not to pry. “I know there’s a stack of reports for you to go through right now, but there’s someone I want you to meet.”

“Who?” Alec asked, tilted his head in confusion, a small crease between his eyebrows.

Maryse didn’t give her son an answer, instead looping her arm around Alec’s and dragging him out of the office and down the hallway to the Ops Centre.

“Mum, you’re back!” Isabelle squealed, abandoning her work on the computer and running over to her mother, smiling ear to ear as she hugged her.

“Hey, Maryse,” Jace greeted with a respectful smile.

“You’re not going to hug your mother after not seeing her for so long?” Maryse asked, raising her eyebrows.

Jace chuckled and stepped forward, wrapping his arms around his adoptive mother. “It’s good to see you.”

Maryse took a step back and looked at her three children, pride settling in her chest. “It’s so good to see all of you together. Since you’re all here, there’s someone I want you to meet.”

Entering the Ops Centre, from behind Maryse, came a young, petite woman with her blonde hair tied up in a neat ponytail, professional smile adorning her face. “Pleased to meet you, Lightwoods,” she said with a nod.

“This is Lydia Branwell, envoy from the Clave. She’s just here for an audit and I thought that maybe _you_ ,” Maryse introduced, looking over at Alec, “and Lydia could get to know each other better.”

Alec furrowed his eyebrows. “Why?”

“Well,” Maryse started. Alec could see his mother’s shoulders tensing which was rare. “Somewhere down the road, I would like you two to be married.”

“What?!” Jace exclaimed, drawing every single Shadowhunter’s attention in the Ops Centre.

“Jace,” Maryse hissed, giving him a disappointed look.

“Sorry,” Jace grumbled as the other Shadowhunters went back to what they were doing before.

“Mother, what are you talking about?” Alec asked, attempting to remain calm but he knew his voice was anything but.

“Alec, you’re the oldest and your soulmate has yet to appear. It will soon be time for you to settle down. Lydia is a wonderful woman and bringing you two together will make the Lightwood and Branwell name stronger.”

Alec looked at Lydia who didn’t seem to have any reaction to the news. “You agreed to this?”

“I have my own goals and this could benefit both of us and our families,” Lydia replied like she was making a business transaction and not talking to her future life partner. “I understand we aren’t soulmates but we could be friends, Alec.”

“But Alec already has a –” Isabelle tried to get out only to be interrupted by Alec.

“Mother, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“This will be good for the family. We may be Lightwoods but the Clave still have not forgotten Benedict Lightwood’s… indecencies and a few of them still look down on your father and I due to The Uprising. This will bring honour back to our family.”

Maryse had a good point. Being the oldest of one of the oldest Shadowhunter families, Alec spent most of his life trying to be the perfect son and the perfect warrior. He was always told about how important family was and how imperative it was for him to carry out his duty as a Lightwood. He wanted to do right by his family and become the formidable leader he dreamed of being. Alec’s marriage to Lydia Branwell would solidify his future and set him on a path of reaching further than just the Head of the New York Institute. His mother was giving him the opportunity to be able to achieve everything he had dreamed of since he was a young boy.

Well, almost everything.

Marrying Lydia meant that Alec could never have Magnus. Dear, sweet, kind Magnus, who had Alec questioning his prejudice’s and family values, turning his world upside down and challenging every thought Alec had about Downworlders. It hadn’t been long since Alec met Magnus but the man was a constant in his life and honestly, Alec lived for the moments he would see Magnus. It had only been a few days and the slight pain in his chest was reminding him of how much he missed Magnus. When Magnus would look at Alec with something akin to love, Alec’s heart would swell, full of warmth, and it caught Alec’s breath in his throat. Then Magnus’ fingers would linger on Alec’s arm and Alec would be able to breathe again. Hearing Magnus’ voice made Alec’s insides melt but he never wanted Magnus to stop talking, to hear that smooth, low voice carry him to peace. No one had ever had such an effect on Alec. It didn’t matter how short the time was since they met each other, Alec knew that Magnus was already a part of him. He hoped that maybe Magnus thought the same of him.

The constant conflict between Alec doing right by his family and Alec doing the right thing for himself was pulling him at the seams. How was he supposed to choose?

“Good evening, Shadowhunters! The High Warlock of Brooklyn is back to save the day!”

Everyone turned around at the sound of Magnus’ obnoxious greeting to see the warlock waving his arms in a flourish, sending blue sparks out of his fingers. Alec had to hold himself back from smiling at the warlock, relieved to see him back safe and sound. It had been too long since he had heard Magnus’ voice.

Magnus dropped his arms and looked around the room, sensing the tension and seriousness. “You all need to lighten up a bit,” he quipped, straightening out his navy blazer and clearing his throat.

“Maryse, I’ll be in your office going over the procedures,” Lydia said softly to Maryse with a hand on her shoulder before turning and walking away.

Magnus confidently glided in next to Alec, placing his hand at the base of Alec’s back and smiling to himself when he heard Alec sigh softly. “Maryse Lightwood? Is that you?”

Maryse pressed her lips into a thin line and looked at Magnus with disgust. “Magnus Bane,” she spat.

“How long has it been? Ten? Twenty years?” Magnus asked, clearly amused by the situation. “The years have been doing you good.”

“Mr Bane, why have you blessed us with your presence?”

“Your children requested that I help them with the fact that my father is wreaking havoc on your precious city,” Magnus replied, his smile visibly annoying Maryse. “Alexander is a great partner.”

Maryse’s eyes immediately darted to Alec, the glare still in place.

“Work partner,” Alec corrected quickly. “Magnus is a work partner. He’s been helping us try to understand what Asmodeus is up to.”

Maryse hummed disapprovingly. “I see. I’ll let you all get back to work, then.”

Maryse gave Magnus one last look, up and down, before turning away with a stiff upper lip and leaving the Ops Centre.

“Talk to you later, Maryse!” Magnus called after the woman, chuckling when he noticed her visibly bristling.

“Magnus,” Alec hissed, glaring at Magnus the same way his mother did. “Was that necessary?”

“Sorry, Alexander,” Magnus apologised, his smile dropping when he noticed how angry Alec was.

“Your mother and I have history.”

“What sort of history?” Isabelle interjected, kind of curious.

“Maryse tried to kill me and I made her land on her ass. She’s hated me ever since.”

Isabelle gasped. “My mum tried to kill you?”

Magnus waved a lazy hand. “It’s all in the past. I still despise the woman, though.”

Alec sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes.

“So, what were you guys talking about before I arrived?” Magnus asked. “It looked serious.”

Jace and Isabelle shared a look then looked at Alec and then at Magnus with the fakest smiles Magnus had seen.

“I think Clary needs me for something so I’ll talk to you later, Magnus,” Isabelle said before quickly running away.

“Yeah, I’ve got a routine patrol to do so I’ll see you later,” Jace said before getting out of the Ops Centre as fast as he can.

“Well, that was strange,” Magnus commented, shrugging. “Are you okay, Alexander?”

“Hm? Oh yeah, I’m fine,” Alec lied, turning to face Magnus, unable to look him in the eyes.

“Hey, you can tell me anything,” Magnus assured, his voice soft and sincere.

Alec sighed again. “I know. Things have just been… difficult. And now that my mother’s here…”

Magnus’ hand moved to Alec’s cheek and through pure instinct, Alec leaned into the touch. “Don’t worry too much about Asmodeus. We’re going to figure out a way to stop him.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”

“I’m here for you, Alexander.”

Alec silently thanked Magnus with a smile. He could see the fondness in Magnus’ warm eyes that he was missing so much and it made the guilt bubble inside him. He didn’t have the heart to tell Magnus what had transpired in the Ops Centre before the warlock got there. Alec technically didn’t agree to the engagement so there was nothing to actually tell Magnus. But technically, Alec also didn’t refuse the engagement. It didn’t matter what he wanted because he already knew what his decision was going to be. He knew he should have told Magnus, but he couldn’t. Not with the warlock looking at him like he had hung the moon and stars. Breaking Magnus’ heart was the last thing Alec wanted to do.

“I missed you, Alexander,” Magnus said softly, and Alec felt so overwhelmed.

Not knowing what to say, Alec chose to pull Magnus into his arms, breathing in a lungful of sandalwood. By the Angel, how he had missed that scent. All the tension in his body automatically melted away when Magnus’ arms wrapped around him and he leaned into Magnus, relishing in how warm and familiar the warlock felt.

Alec could always tell Magnus later. Right now, all he wanted was this.

He wanted to be selfish for one moment and give himself this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	8. Secrets and Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 8 woot!
> 
> I know everyone is really unhappy with Alec right now. Trust me, while I was writing this, I was too. Please don't be too angry with him. He's very very slowly learning to be better. Or at least he's trying to and he's failing miserably. Just a fair warning, you're probably going to be more angry with him after this chapter lol IM SO SORRY ALEC I LOVE YOU SO MUCH but yeah, Magnus deserves better :(
> 
> Happy reading!

Jace was coming at him hard but Alec met his brother move for move, blocking and deflecting when he had to and dodging when it was necessary. His breath was coming out heavy as he threw punches in Jace’s direction to distract him before using his leg to swipe at Jace’s, hoping to make his parabatai fall flat on his face. Unfortunately for Alec, the pure angel blood running through Jace’s veins made him the ultimate fighter. With a simple bounce on his feet, Jace flipped into the air, dodging Alec’s attack, and landed softly on the training mat. Alec rushed forward, throwing a punch at Jace, only to have his wrist grabbed. Jace smirked at Alec before flipping him over his shoulder and making Alec land flat on his back.

“At least you tried. Again,” Jace jested, looking down at Alec with a smug smile, his blonde hair falling over his face.

Alec rolled his eyes and rolled onto his stomach before pushing himself back up and dusting himself off. “Let’s go again,” he panted, jerking his chin at Jace.

“Alec, we’ve been going at this for ages.”

“Just- Jace, please.”

Jace huffed and nodded. “Fine. One more time. That’s it.”

Jace bounced on his feet a few times to get comfortable before getting into a defence stance, his arms up and ready for any move Alec was going to attack him with. Alec came at Jace with his fists again but Jace easily dodged the attacks, moving side to side faster than Alec could hit him. He threw a punch into Alec’s stomach making Alec groan and stagger back a few steps. Jace swiped at Alec’s legs with his own and Alec quickly landed flat on his back. Again. Panting and clutching at his stomach.

Alec stayed laying on the training mat, his hair sticking to his forehead with sweat, as he tried to catch his breath.

“What’s on your mind, Alec?” Jace asked, grabbing a towel to wipe the sweat off his face.

“What do you mean?” Alec replied, his eyes trained on the ceiling.

“You forget that I know you well, parabatai. If I can beat you that easily, your mind must be elsewhere.”

“It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

Jace sat down next to Alec, crossing his legs underneath him. “Come on, talk to me. Is this about Lydia? Or is this about Magnus?”

Alec sighed and sat up, turning to face Jace. “Both, I guess.”

“Alec, do you like Magnus?”

“I… I don’t know…”

Jace scoffed. “Okay, so you like Magnus. That’s good.”

“What if my feelings for him are just because of the bond?”

“Alec, the bond is only there to pull soulmates together. Everything else after that is you guys. The feelings you have for Magnus have nothing to do with the bond.”

Alec sighed again, knowing that Jace was right. What he felt for Magnus was nothing like anything he had ever felt before. It was so strong and raw and he wanted to run away from it as much as he wanted to drown in it. No matter how much he wanted to follow his heart, he pushed those feelings deep down inside of him and acted like they weren’t there. He knew he couldn’t be with Magnus.

“By the Angel, Jace,” Alec groaned, running a hand over his face. “I like him. I _really_ like him.”

“Then, will you marry Lydia?” Jace asked slowly, his face clearly disapproving of the idea.

“Marrying her would be good for my future and for the family,” Alec reasoned, as much as he hated the thought of marrying Lydia. “I can’t disappoint my parents.”

“Fucking hell, Alec,” Jace said through gritted teeth.

“This is what I’ve been working for my whole life.”

“What? To marry someone you hardly even know?”

“I’ll get to know her.”

Jace clenched his fists and looked at Alec with so much anger, anger that he felt for Alec, not because of him. “What about Magnus, Alec? After everything you’ve built so far?”

Alec looked away from Jace, wincing as the pain in his chest coming back. “We never established a relationship. We’re nothing to each other.”

“By the Angel,” Jace grimaced, rubbing at his own chest, knowing the pain wasn’t his. “You can’t do this to yourself for the rest of your life, Alec. It will kill you.”

“As long as I never think about him, I’ll be fine.”

“Has a day passed where you haven’t thought about him?”

Alec’s silence was enough of an answer for Jace.

“Are you going to even fucking tell him?”

“Of course, I will.”

“Will you, Alec?” Jace asked curtly, scowling at Alec. “I know I said I would support you with whatever decision you made, but I can’t accept this. I don’t want to watch you destroy yourself for your family like this.”

“I know what I’m doing, Jace.”

“No, you don’t,” Jace almost yelled. “You’re hurting yourself, and what’s worse? You’re hurting Magnus. He has been by your side through all of this, supporting you unconditionally, even when you kept denying the bond. He doesn’t deserve you hurting him. Don’t break his heart, Alec.”

Alec opened his mouth to say something but no words came out, his mind blank to give any good reasoning for his actions.

Jace sighed and stood up, shaking his head. “I say this as your parabatai, your brother, someone who loves you to the ends of the Earth. You’re making the wrong decision, Alec. You don’t deserve Magnus.”

Those words were like a knife going straight through Alec’s heart.

Alec looked up at Jace and watched as his parabatai turned away from him, shoulders slumped as he left the training room. He knew he was hurting Jace. There was so much disappointment and anger through the bond, and the knot of guilt tightened in his stomach. Alec knew Jace was right. It was evident how much he wanted Magnus, how much happiness he could have with Magnus. The warlock was so kind and selfless, and it was true, Alec didn’t deserve him. Magnus deserved so much better than what Alec had to offer.

It was wrong of him to string Magnus along like this. And he was a coward for not saying anything.

Alec flopped back down on the training mat and stared up at the ceiling, wishing he could just fade away.

**From Magnus:** _Alexander~_

**From Alexander:** _It’s late._

**From Magnus:** _Are you busy?_

**From Alexander:** _Yes._

**From Magnus:** _Would you come if I told you I wanted to see you?_

It took Alec exactly ten minutes to arrive at Magnus’ apartment, pushing open the unlocked door and smelling the faint scent of sandalwood in the air. Magnus was already standing there, waiting for him and Alec’s heart swelled. He immediately wrapped his arms around the warlock, holding him close, like he was never going to have the chance to hold him again.

“I guess the answer was ‘yes’,” Magnus chuckled, putting his arms around Alec and sighing happily.

Alec was choosing to be selfish for this one night. For just one night, he wanted to be with Magnus and pretend that nothing in the world could pull them apart. He wanted to pretend that he wasn’t throwing away his happiness to make his parents happy. He wanted to pretend that he had a future with Magnus, one that consisted of him and Magnus travelling the world together and kissing under starry nights. He wanted just one night to pretend that he was Magnus’ and Magnus was his.

It was so wrong and disgusting of him to give Magnus hope like this, to not tell him about the engagement. Alec knew what a terrible person he was. But he couldn’t bear to break Magnus’ heart, not when he had one last time to just be with Magnus. Jace’s words ran through his head and he gritted his teeth at the guilt running through his body. It made him feel sick to his stomach. He knew that after tonight, all the pain that was coming to him would be ten-fold, but he didn’t care. Magnus for one night was all he needed.

Alec pulled back just slightly and looked down at Magnus, his fingers going through Magnus’ hair, and smiled. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered.

Magnus put his arms around Alec’s neck and pushed his fingers up into Alec’s hair. “So I’ve heard. It’s quite nice to hear it from you, though.”

“I’ll tell you as many times as you like,” Alec said, placing a soft kiss on Magnus’ forehead, chuckling at the dusting of pink on Magnus’ cheeks.

“You’re awfully forward tonight, Mr Lightwood,” Magnus teased.

Alec shrugged. “I just felt like doing it.”

Magnus tilted his head, looking at Alec with concern. “Is everything alright, Alexander? You’re not usually like this.”

Alec pulled Magnus back into his arms, hooking his chin over Magnus’ shoulder, not wanting the warlock to see his face. “Everything’s fine when I’m with you.”

Magnus hummed and ran his hand up and down Alec’s back in comfort.

They stood like that for a few minutes, finding peace in each other’s company, only the slow breaths and hearts beating in tandem could be heard. Alec never wanted to let go. He could stay like this forever if he had the chance. Alec knew he had the chance. He could tell his mother about Magnus, about how he didn’t want to be engaged to Lydia, he could go back on all of it. But his family was everything to him and he couldn’t disappoint them like that. Giving himself this one moment to hold onto Magnus like this meant more than anything in the world. Alec would have given up his bow and arrow for this.

“Magnus?”

“Yes, Alexander?”

“I like you.”

Alec could hear Magnus let out a sigh of relief. “I like you too,” Magnus replied.

“Do you mind if I stay the night?”

Magnus immediately pulled back from a frowning Alec, arching his eyebrows. “I think it’s a bit early for that. We haven’t even kissed yet.”

Alec shook his head. “No, not _that_. I want to fall asleep in your bed. With you.”

“What would your mother say about this?”

“Why would that matter?”

Magnus chuckled and nodded, taking Alec’s hand and leading him to the bedroom.

Much like the rest of Magnus’ apartment, Magnus’ bedroom was wide and spacious, the bed situated in the middle of the far wall. Two matching bedside tables sat on either side of the bed, each with their own tablet lamp, one with a digital clock. There was a burgundy velvet armchair in the corner with a matching ottoman where a book sat, most likely for decorative purposes. Or maybe Magnus enjoyed reading books about cooking cucumbers. Magnus’ very full but neat closet sat to the right of the door, clothes sorted into categories of type and colour. Alec assumed that the door on the far-right wall led to Magnus’ very own en suite bathroom.

Magnus let go of Alec’s hand, discarding the slippers of his feet and getting under the covers, leaning back against his headboard.

“Come on, Mr Lightwood, we don’t have all night,” Magnus said, flipping open the blanket and tapping the bed before sliding his hand over the silk bedsheet.

Alec didn’t need to be told twice. He quickly removed his jacket and kicked off his shoes, sliding into the bed and immediately curling up against Magnus. Magnus smiled and laid down, turning to face Alec, tangling their legs together. He tucked Alec’s hair behind his hair before cupping his jaw with his hand. They looked into each other’s eyes, not saying a word, just admiring and searching for secret messages. Alec couldn’t help but smile, happiness flowing through his entire body at being so close to Magnus, at being able to have this certain moment with Magnus.

“You should go to sleep, darling,” Magnus said softly, his thumb running along Alec’s cheekbone. “I’ll see you when you wake.”

Alec nodded and closed his eyes, moving as close as he could to Magnus. He sighed when he felt the wait of Magnus’ arm across his waist and curling around his back. He tucked his head under Magnus’ chin and listened carefully as the warlock hummed a soft lullaby.

“Good night, Magnus.”

“Good night, Alexander.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	9. The Downfall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 9, here we go! WARNING AHEAD: ANGST. This is a short chapter but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless :) I do promise a happy ending but we just have some things to get through first. Please dont hate me or Alec too much lol
> 
> Happy reading!

The moment Alec stepped in the Institute, panting and covered in demon ichor, Magnus was immediately on him, intending to check for injuries as he always did. This time, Alec put a hand against Magnus’ chest and pushed the man away before he even got the chance. He made his way to the Ops Centre, not daring to turn around to see the hurt on Magnus’ face, his stomach twisting in the worst possible way.

When he entered the Ops Centre, he saw Clary helping to heal Izzy’s arm while there was Simon fretting over an uninjured and mostly clean Jace. Lydia stood at the main screen in front of the maps table with a tablet in her hand, scrolling through images and information, looking over things with Maryse. Alec could feel Magnus’ presence behind him but he ignored it, marching up to the maps table and standing next to Lydia, looking over her shoulder.

“You’ve got anything?” Alec asked, eyes on the screen.

Lydia tapped on the tablet and brought up similar images to what he had seen before with the past attacks. “This is it. Same as the other times, according to what I read in the reports.”

“And no message this time?”

Lydia opened her mouth to answer but was interrupted by a hand being held out to her.

“Magnus Bane,” Magnus introduced with a smile. “Who might you be?”

“Mr Bane, it’s nice to finally meet you,” Lydia replied with a professional smile, shaking Magnus’ hand. “I’m Lydia Branwell.”

“Alec’s fiancée,” Maryse interjected, sounding proud.

The tensing in both Alec and Magnus was obvious to the people who knew about their bond but Maryse and Lydia were none the wiser. Alec could feel Magnus burning holes into his back with his eyes and he turned slowly to face the warlock, unable to make out the expression on his face. He didn’t know if Magnus was angry or disappointed or upset. His face was void of any emotion and Alec didn’t know how to deal with that.

“So,” Magnus started. “Engaged, huh?”

Alec opened his mouth, wanting to explain himself, but then closed it before muttering, “yes.”

“They’re both going to make a beautiful couple,” Maryse commented, not noticing the tension between her son and Magnus.

There was a flicker of hurt in Magnus’ eyes before he gave Alec a fake smile. “I guess congratulations are in order.”

“Magnus, I –”

“I hope you’ll be happy, Alexander.” Alec could hear the bitterness in Magnus’ voice and it was like a knife to his heart.

“Magnus –”

“I wish you all the best.” Another knife into Alec’s heart.

“No, Magn –”

“May your future be blessed.” And another knife into Alec’s heart.

Alec didn’t want to do this, not here, not now. But he knew he had to.

“I’ll be right back,” Alec said to Lydia and his mother before grabbing Magnus’ hand and dragging him to his bedroom.

What was he supposed to do? What was he supposed to say?

Everything felt so wrong. All of it. The engagement, Jace being disappointed in him, lying to Magnus, hurting Magnus, all of it. Alec had always been sure of who he was and what he wanted but over the past several weeks, he had never felt more lost or afraid. Being a Shadowhunter meant bravery and courage, but Alec had neither when it came to Magnus or standing up to his mother. He was so used to following orders and doing what other people expected of him, but none of this was right.

Hurting Magnus had to be the worst thing he had ever done.

“Get off me, Alec,” Magnus spat, snatching his hand away from Alec the moment the door of Alec’s bedroom closed behind them. “Don’t fucking touch me.”

“Magnus, I am so s –”

“Don’t fucking say it. I don’t want to hear it. Were you ever going to tell me? Or was I to be your boytoy on the side?”

Alec shook his head and stepped forward towards Magnus, his heart clenching when Magnus took a step away from him. “No, Magnus, you mean so much more than that.”

Magnus let out a sad laugh. “Do I, Alec? If you had any feelings for me, any sort of respect for me, you would have told me about this.”

“I was going to,” Alec replied, sounding so desperate. “I just didn’t know how.”

“What about the other night when you stayed over? Were you engaged then?” Magnus asked, crossing his arms across his chest.

Alec looked at Magnus then looked away, not being able to bring himself to answer.

“I can’t fucking believe this,” Magnus said, running his hands through his hair. “I can’t believe you would do this to me. I thought we had something. Was everything you said a lie?”

“By the Angel, Magnus, no. I like you. I like you so much. I just –”

“Can’t be with me,” Magnus finished for Alec, clenching his jaw. “Yeah, I get it. Your soulmate will never mean more to you than your family honour. Thanks for letting me know how much I meant to you.”

Magnus turned to leave but Alec grabbed on his wrist, holding so tightly, praying Magnus wouldn’t go.

“Magnus, please,” Alec begged, his voice strained.

It took a few seconds but Magnus spun back around and Alec could see the tears in his eyes. Alec’s heart dropped into his stomach.

“I never should have let you make me hope,” Magnus said, voice soft and pained. “I wanted you. I wanted us. I thought you wanted that too.”

“I do. You have no idea how much I do.”

“Then why, Alexander? Why?” A tear rolled down Magnus’ cheek and Alec could feel his heart tearing in two.

“My parents have done so much for me and I can’t disappoint them. I can’t let them down.”

“You’re going to sacrifice everything we have, your own happiness, for them? For people who you call family but don’t seem to care about you or what you want?”

“It’s just what I have to do.”

Magnus wiped away the tear on his cheek and sniffled. “You don’t have to, Alexander. You know you don’t have to.”

“I’m so sorry, Magnus,” Alec apologised again, letting go of Magnus’ wrist. “I can’t give up my life for you.”

That was like a knife plunging into Magnus’ heart. He shook his head and sighed. “If this is your decision, I’ll respect it. But I cannot stand around and watch you run off and get married to someone you will never fall in love with. I hope you’ll realise the mistake you’re making.”

“Magnus, I –”

Magnus shook his head to get Alec to stop talking. He stepped closer to Alec, his hand finding its familiar place against Alec’s cheek. He looked at Alec with such sorrow and regret, like as if it was the last time he was going to see him.

“I like you, Alec, so much. I wish I could have been the one to give you the happiness you deserve,” he said softly, wiping away a tear on Alec’s cheek with his thumb.

Magnus leaned in, placing a kiss on Alec’s cheek, his lips lingering for just a second. He sighed again and turned around, walking to the bedroom door.

“I’m sorry,” Alec apologised one more time as Magnus’ hand reached for the doorknob.

“I’m sorry, too,” Magnus replied, glancing over his shoulder at Alec.

Clutching at the pain in his chest, Alec watched as Magnus walked away, taking a part of Alec’s heart with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	10. Rival

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 10, here we go! Another short one but I promise a LONG one after this :)
> 
> I understand everyone's frustration with Alec, I really do. But I hope you can also understand what he's going through. It's certainly not an excuse for his poor behaviour but it's somewhat of an explanation. As someone to grew up in an environment where I believed that whatever I did in the future was to payback my parents and I was constantly judged for my choices, I understand what it is like to be in his shoes. It took a lot of hard work for me to break from the cycle and learn to do what I wanted and live for myself and not for other people. You can definitely be frustrated with him and hate him, i totally get it. I hope you just understand why he is the way he is. He's slowly learning to be better :)
> 
> Anyways, you get a bit of Magnus POV in this which I think is kinda nice :)
> 
> Happy reading!

“The most recent attack was here,” Clary said, pointing to the new location on the hologram map marked with a red X. “From what Magnus said before, it is safe to say that Asmodeus is planning to create his own pentagram. He’s planning to come to Earth.”

“What in the world could he want that’s here?” Simon asked as everyone’s heads lifted to look at Magnus standing at the end of the table.

Magnus’ eyes darted from side to side, looking at everyone’s face. He shrugged and said, “I honestly don’t know. We don’t exactly keep in contact. But my father is dangerous. He is willing to go to any lengths to get what he wants.”

“So far he’s only sent in a high number of demons and we’ve managed to banish them back to Edom. But we need to figure out a way to prevent him from coming here. Maybe there’s a spell,” Isabelle suggested.

“A spell to stop a Prince of Hell from coming to Earth?” Magnus asked, like it was the most outrageous thing he had heard. “I don’t know if something like that exists.”

“It doesn’t hurt to look,” Jace said with a shrug. “We’ve got nothing else to go on.”

Magnus hummed and nodded before clicking his fingers and summoning all the spell books he had available, everyone jumping back as they fell to the table with a loud thump. He scrawled a quick fire message to Ragnor and sent it away and within a minute, more books fell onto the table with another loud thump. Magnus rolled up his sleeves and grabbed the first book his eyes laid on, flipping it open to a random page, gesturing to the rest of the books, urging everyone to take one.

“Alright, time to get started,” he declared as everyone reached for a book.

Alec grabbed the closest book to him and stepped away from the table, settling against the nearest wall. He opened the book to the first page and started to slowly flip through it, trying to find anything that could help them. But his mind was distracted. He had Asmodeus to worry about but all he could think about was Magnus. All he ever thought about was Magnus. After their last conversation, they had hardly spoken a word to each other, only seeing each other when they had meetings like this. Magnus would barely even look at Alec and Alec hated the small surges of pain he would feel in his chest because of it.

Alec couldn’t help but glance up at Magnus standing on the other side of the room, smiling as he talked to Isabelle and Clary. He missed when Magnus would smile at him like that, when Magnus was happy to see him. The most Magnus would ever do now was give Alec a nod to acknowledge him. Alec knew he shouldn’t be this upset about the whole situation, considering he made his decision. He couldn’t be with a warlock and now he wasn’t with one. Magnus was respecting his decision, keeping away from him and keeping their relationship on a purely professional level. It didn’t matter how much pain Alec was feeling, he was doing all of this for his family. If his family was happy then he could try to be happy too.

“You’re staring,” a voice said, pulling Alec out of his thoughts. He turned to see Lydia with a book in her hand.

“I wasn’t staring,” Alec mumbled, looking down at his book.

“Let me guess. Soulmate?” Lydia asked, tilting her head with a smile.

Alec sighed. “How did you know?”

“You wear your heart on your sleeve, Alec. It’s very obvious. It hurts to be away from him, doesn’t it?”

Alec looked at Magnus again, eyes widening when he realised Magnus was looking at him too. The disappointment set in as soon as Magnus turned away.

“It hurts to also be with him, doesn’t it?” Lydia continued. “You know, we don’t have to do this. I would never hold it against you.”

“But our families…” Alec protested.

“I had a soulmate once,” Lydia admitted, looking over at Magnus. “He died.”

“I’m so sorry, Lydia.”

“Thank you. He was the love of my life. Still is. He died protecting me from a demon attack and it absolutely broke me. Losing someone I loved with my whole being like that was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced. I don’t want you to go through what I did.”

“I don’t love him.”

Lydia smiled softly at Alec. “But you will. You might not feel it yet, but you’ll come to love him, Alec.”

“I don’t know…”

“If he’s distracting you this much, you’re already halfway there,” Lydia said, amused. “I know we could be happy, Alec, even just as friends who decided to get married. But I don’t want to take away your chance at true love. I am happy with whatever you decide.”

Alec looked at Lydia then at Magnus, lingering for just a moment, then back at Lydia and nodded. “Thank you, Lydia.”

“Got to keep my fiancé happy, right? Or he might leave me,” Lydia joked.

Alec threw his head back and laughed, not noticing the way Magnus was staring at him and gripping tightly onto the book in his hands.

Magnus clenched his jaw as he saw Alec, his dear Alexander, smiling and laughing with Lydia. He knew they didn’t have anything between them anymore, but he couldn’t deny the affection he felt for Alec, how strong his feelings had grown in such a small amount of time. He couldn’t deny the way Alec was able to latch onto his heart and, honest to God, he didn’t want the man to ever let go. But he did. Alec decided that he couldn’t belong to Magnus and Magnus would never be his. Just thinking about it had Magnus feeling tight in his chest, praying things could have been different. It hurt so much more than Magnus was willing to admit.

“Uh, Magnus?” Clary said, placing her hand over Magnus’ one that was close to ripping his book apart. “I know these books are yours, but I don’t think you would appreciate destroying something so important to you.”

Magnus turned his head away from looking at Alec and blinked down at Clary, following her line of sight to the book in his hand. “Oh,” he started, physically relaxing and holding the closed book down at his side. “Sorry… I was preoccupied.”

Clary glanced over at Alec speaking to Lydia. “Don’t worry about those two.”

“I know my brother, Magnus. He won’t go through with it,” Isabelle said, giving Magnus more hope than he should have been feeling. “He’s just scared.”

“We talked and we’re okay as we can be. Alec is going to go off and get married,” Magnus said, trying to hide the strain in his voice. “And I’m going to continue living my life as an amazing warlock who throws great parties. We can pretend this whole soulmate thing never happened.”

“He won’t go through with it,” Jace repeated as he and Simon made their way over to the small group.

“You guys have to stop giving me all this false hope for something that’s never going to happen.”

“He likes you, Magnus, but he keeps denying it, pushing the feeling away so he doesn’t have to deal with it,” Jace explained, looking over at Alec and shaking his head.

“How do you know?” Magnus asked, arching his eyebrows at Jace.

“Parabatai,” Jace said flatly, like it was the most obvious thing ever. “His emotions when he’s with you are kind of…” Jace took a moment to find the right word. “Zingy.”

“Zingy?” Simon asked, amused.

Jace shrugged. “I don’t know how else to explain it. They kind of feel like what I feel when I look at you.”

Simon grinned. “Aw, you feel zingy about me, Jace?”

Jace chuckled and tucked a stray hair behind Simon’s ear. “Of course, babe. I always feel zingy about you.”

“Do you feel zingy about me?” Clary asked Isabelle, pouting.

“If I didn’t feel zingy, I wouldn’t be able to do this,” Isabelle said before placing a soft kiss on Clary’s lips and Clary’s pout turned into a wide smile.

Magnus cleared his throat loudly and looked at the couples with disdain. “I didn’t come here to be surrounded by idiots in love while I wallow in self-pity because of my failing love life. Forget about me and Alec. Go look through the books and see if you can find something that can help us with stopping my father from destroying this world.”

Magnus made a shoo-ing motion with his hands which managed to work and make everyone walk away and focus on the task at hand. He was about to turn and walk away but was stopped by Jace’s hand on his shoulder.

“Seriously though, about Alec, he’s going to make the right decision. He would be too stupid not to,” Jace said with a smile, squeezing Magnus’ shoulder before walking off with Simon.

Magnus didn’t know how much of what Jace said would be true. They were all giving him a sense of hope and it had the butterflies in his stomach fluttering. But he knew Alec. The man had made his decision. Avoiding Alec like the plague was one of the hardest things he ever had to do. He would notice the gazes, but Alec would look away every time Magnus even so much as lifted his head. Sometimes, when his back was turned, he could feel Alec’s gaze burning into him and it had him wanting to convince Alec that he was making the worst decision of his life.

But Magnus wasn’t one to beg. Why beg for someone to be with you when they clearly didn’t want to?

Magnus sighed and looked over at Alec to see the Shadowhunter looking at him with something like longing in his eyes.

By the Angel, what Magnus would give to have Alec look at him like that forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	11. War of Hearts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 11 here we go!
> 
> All I'm gonna say is: I've been super excited to post this chapter! It's a longer one :)
> 
> Happy reading!

He couldn’t stand it anymore. He had to get out.

Alec couldn’t stand being in the Institute a second longer. He had spent days pouring over the books Magnus had given them, finding nothing that could be useful against Asmodeus. It would seem like not many people had to ever deal with a Prince of Hell coming to Earth and wreaking havoc on all of mankind.

But it wasn’t just that that had him frustrated.

Alec couldn’t stand being around his siblings and their soulmates. He couldn’t stand being around his mother and her incessant need to talk about Lydia and their wedding and how proud she was of him for making the right decision for their family. It made Alec feel sick to his stomach. He knew it wasn’t the right decision. Every fibre of his body was telling him, screaming at him, that all of this was utterly wrong. Lydia could see his struggle but she tried not to mention it, not wanting to add onto his burden. Over the past few days, Lydia had been the only one to give Alec any semblance of peace and he was eternally grateful.

Feeling extremely suffocated being inside the Institute, Alec left, finding himself at the Hunter’s Moon.

He had no idea how he got there but it was where his feet took him, and he couldn’t deny that he was happier to be in some place where he could take the Shadowhunter mask off and be himself. He was off the clock and had no responsibilities to bear here and that helped to alleviate the tension in his body.

Alec took a seat at the end of the bar, looking around, unsure of what he was supposed to do.

“You look like a lost little lamb,” Maia commented, an amused smile on her face.

“Uh, yeah,” Alec said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t really come here.”

“I have to say, I am surprised to see you here, Lightwood. What has made you come to our neck of the woods?”

“I needed some fresh air.”

“Ah, I see. Being the prodigal son must be real tough.”

“What do you mean?” Alec asked, tilting his head.

Maia snorted. “You know, being the perfect son and upholding the family values and traditions and all that. Doing things you don’t want to do because you’re told it’s the right thing to do even though you know it’s not. Following in your parents’ footsteps and not thinking about what you actually want. Pretending to be someone you’re not just to please everyone else. That sort of thing. It must be really hard and I can understand you wanting a break from it all.”

“Right, yeah, that,” Alec said, eyes cast down, staring at a small scratch in the wooden surface of the bar.

Alec snorted to himself and shook his head. His whole life, Alec lived for the Clave, for his family, for his parents. He took care of his siblings and worked hard to become the best warrior he could be to please his parents. Every time they told him they were proud of him, Alec felt like he could burst with happiness. He placed so much of his self-worth on how his family and other people thought of him, working hard to please everyone and present himself as the perfect son and perfect soldier. Of course, Alec still wanted to be a leader, he felt that in his soul, but looking back over the past couple months, Alec realised that he was never really living for himself. All these years wasted following orders and never making a decision for himself. He had been wrong about so many things and all it took was a certain warlock coming into his life and flipping his world upside down for him to realise it.

“You look like you could use a drink,” Maia said, wiping down the bar with a towel. “What do you want?”

“I don’t really–”

“He’ll have a rum and coke. I’ll have a martini,” a familiar voice ordered, settling down on the empty barstool next to Alec.

“Hey, Magnus!” Maia greeted with a grin. “Coming right up!”

Alec froze.

He kept his eyes stuck on the tiny scratch in the wood of the bar, unsure of what he was supposed to do in a situation like this. Alec was always prepared for any situation that arose. He knew how to fight demons up close and afar. He knew how to dispatch the right teams for missions. He knew how to deal with the Clave when they were being unreasonable. He knew how to deal with Jace when he was being an idiot. He knew how to deal with Isabelle when she was being an idiot. He knew how to deal with Clary when she was being an idiot. Heck, he even knew how to deal with Simon. He was always prepared. Always.

But not for this.

“You’re not going to even acknowledge me?” Alec heard Magnus ask, sadness in his voice.

Alec sat up and turned to face Magnus, giving him an awkward smile. “Hi, Magnus. I, uh, didn’t realise that you came here.”

Magnus snorted and smiled. “I didn’t realise that you came here either.”

“I don’t,” Alec confessed, rubbing the back of his neck again. “I just needed some air.”

Magnus nodded in understanding as Maia handed them their drinks before making her way back down to the other side of the bar. “So, what happened?” he asked, taking a sip of his martini.

Alec looked down at his drink and shrugged. “Everyone was being insufferable.”

“I see. How’s your fiancée doing?”

Alec gulped and sat up straighter, lifting his drink to his lips and drinking as much as he could.

“Woah, slow down there, soldier,” Magnus warned, grabbing onto Alec’s glass and pulling it away from him, putting it down on the bar. “If you didn’t want to answer, you could have just told me.”

Alec shook his head. “No, it’s not that. I’m just nervous.”

“Why?”

“You make me nervous,” Alec admitted.

Magnus’ lips twitched, the corners curling on their own. “I make you nervous?”

“Yeah, you do. You always seem so calm, cool and collected and you’re always asking these questions that I never have answers to. I can’t figure you out sometimes and it frustrates me to no end. You’re an enigma, Magnus.”

“I don’t know if that’s a compliment but it’s nice to know that you’re thinking about me so much.” Alec could hear the amusement in Magnus’ voice.

“I don’t think about you that much,” Alec muttered, taking a sip of his drink and scrunching his nose at the taste.

“Really? Cause I’m thinking about you constantly,” Magnus said, his tone serious.

Alec’s eyes widened as he coughed into his cup, feeling the bun of the alcohol in his throat as a small amount went down the wrong pipe. He looked at Magnus and felt his cheeks warm, hoping the warlock couldn’t see how red he was under the dark lights of the bar. Magnus was looking at him again with affection in his eyes and Alec wanted nothing more than to pull Magnus towards him and kiss him.

By the Angel, what Alec wouldn’t give to have Magnus look at him like that forever.

“I… I… I…” was all Alec managed to say before Magnus looked away from him, drinking his martini.

“Isabelle tells me that the announcement of your engagement is tomorrow,” Magnus casually mentioned.

“Oh, right, yeah, tomorrow,” Alec nodded and went back to looking in his cup.

“Do you mind if I’m there?”

Alec tilted his head at Magnus in confusion. “You want to see your soulmate getting engaged to someone else?”

Magnus blinked at Alec. “Wow, I think that’s the first time you’ve acknowledged we’re soulmates.” Alec opened his mouth to say something but was stopped by Magnus saying, “Anyway, I seem to like self-torture. I would like to be there.”

“Um, yeah, I guess you can come,” Alec agreed, swallowing the lump of saliva in his throat.

“Wonderful,” Magnus said with a smile, downing the rest of his Martini and standing up, stretching his legs. “It was lovely to see you, Alexander.”

Alec frowned slightly at Magnus getting ready to leave. There was a part of him that wished Magnus would stay and would convince him to stay in that bar all the way into tomorrow so that he wouldn’t have to get engaged. “It was good seeing you too, Magnus.”

Magnus put his hand against Alec’s cheek, like he had done so many times before, and, on instinct, Alec leaned into the touch. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”

Alec sighed in bliss and nodded. “Yeah, soon.”

And like that, Magnus turned and left, taking the rest of Alec’s heart with him.

The Ops Centre was full of all the Shadowhunters assigned to the New York Institute. They were chattering away, some wondering what the big deal was, some assuming that it was the announcement of Alec being the official Head of the Institute. Alec was standing atop the steps, looking down at the big crowd and he could feel his palms getting sweaty as he kept his hands clasped behind his back. He had never had so many people look at him at one time and he hated the attention. Alec always liked to lurk in the background so this was making him exceptionally uncomfortable. His siblings being in the crowd, front and centre, did help to calm his nerves just a bit. Seeing their familiar faces, smiling at him and urging him to take a breath, helped with how anxious he was feeling. That was until his eyes scanned the crowd and landed on the handsome man decked out in jewellery, eyes lined with kohl, and dressed to perfection, standing in the back,

_Magnus_.

Alec’s breath caught in his throat when Magnus sent him a gentle smile. By the Angel, it was really just that easy for the warlock to steal Alec’s breath. Alec didn’t think he would actually come but there Magnus was, standing in a room filled with Shadowhunters to watch Alec make the biggest mistake of his life. It was strange but just by simply seeing Magnus’ face in the crowd, Alec immediately felt calmer, his nerves rattling just slightly.

Lydia came up to stand next to Alec, clearing her throat to get his attention.

“You’re staring again,” she whispered, nudging him with her elbow.

Alec quickly tore his eyes away from Magnus and smiled awkwardly. “Right, I’ve got to stop doing that.”

Lydia covered her mouth with her hand and chuckled. “You do it a lot, but I try not to mention it. We all see you do it but no one wants to talk about it. I think it’s sweet that you’re so infatuated. I told you, you would fall in love.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “I’m not in love with him.”

Lydia hummed and pursed her lips. “You’re almost there. Maybe 75% of the way there.”

“I am not–”

“Hello, fellow Shadowhutners,” Maryse greeted the crowd, stopping the conversation between Alec and Lydia. “I know you’re all wondering why we are gathered here today, and I promise I won’t keep you too long. As all of you know, Lydia Branwell has been here as an envoy from the Clave. She has been a great help to us over the past few weeks and today my family and I have some exciting news. I am happy to announce that my son, Alexander Gideon Lightwood, the next Head of the New York Institute, and Lydia Branwell are engaged.”

There was a moment of silence before whispers started amongst the crowd and Alec could feel his palms getting sweaty again. Looking out at the crowd, he searched for the one face he needed to see. Magnus was still smiling at him, but Alec could clearly see the pain in his eyes. There was a familiar pang in his chest that spread and burned, and Alec just knew he couldn’t do this anymore. He should have made this decision a long time ago. Even if his mother were to hate him, he should have never agreed to something as ridiculous as this engagement.

From the moment he was told about the engagement, he knew, deep in the recesses of his heart, how wrong it was. It was against nature to go against his own instincts, especially when it concerned his soulmate. More than the engagement being wrong, causing Magnus, who had been generous and patient, unnecessary pain was worse. Magnus didn’t deserve all the absurd things Alec was putting him through. Magnus didn’t deserve to see his soulmate running off into the sunset with someone else. Magnus deserved happiness. Alec deserved happiness, and there was only one person who could give it to him. He understood the implications of what he was going to do, but he needed to do it. For no one else but himself. Alec knew he had to save himself from a lifetime of sorrow and misery.

Alec took a deep breath and turned to face his fiancée. “Lydia.”

“I know, Alec,” Lydia said, smiling at him.

“I can’t do this. Not when I feel this way,” Alec confessed, hanging his head.

“Hey, it’s okay. I kind of expected this but I wanted you to come to the decision on your own.”

“I’m so sorry.”

Lydia shook her head. “Don’t apologise. You’re a good person. Sometimes a little too good. I had my chance with my soulmate and he made me the happiest person in the world. Now, you have a chance with yours and you deserve to experience every ounce of love and happiness the Angels have to offer. Don’t let something like this slip through your fingers because you’re scared. I want you to be happy.”

Lydia’s fingers brushed over Alec’s cheek before she turned away and took a step forward to address the crowd.

“I’m so sorry to do this to everyone, especially you, Maryse, but there has been a mistake,” Lydia announced. Alec watched her with thankful eyes. “I cannot, I will not, marry Alec Lightwood.”

“What?” Maryse hissed, her face morphing into anger, as the whispers in the crowd turned into loud murmurs as people grew more confused about the situation.

Lydia went back to Alec and gave him a warm smile.

“Lydia, I don’t know what to say,” he said, taking Lydia’s hand into his own.

“You don’t have to say anything. Just go tell Magnus you love him.”

Alec smiled. “I don’t love him.”

“You’re almost there,” Lydia repeated with a small laugh.

Alec took in a deep calming breath. “Thank you so much, Lydia,” he said, kissing the back of her hand. “Thank you.”

Alec let go of Lydia’s hand and went to stand at the edge of the steps, looking out over the crowd who had gone silent with his movement. They all stared up at Alec and if Alec said he was nervous before, it was nothing like what he was feeling now. Alec heard his mother call out his name behind him, but he ignored her, focusing on the one face in the crowd he cared about. Alec locked eyes with Magnus and could tell the warlock was still shocked and confused, trying to process what Lydia has said.

Looking at Magnus, Alec had never felt so sure about anything in his life but this. For once in his life, Alec knew exactly what he wanted. And he wanted this for himself. Not for his family or for the Clave, but for him. Nothing had made more sense than this and Alec knew that this decision was never going to be one that he would come to regret.

Alec took slow steps to the bottom of the stairs, eyes scanning over the crowd before taking in a deep breath and straightening his posture, holding his head up high. He took a step forward and then another and then another, the crowd slowly parting in half for him to make his way through. He paused for a second, seeing Magnus on the other side, sending the warlock a small smile. Pulling himself together, he strode through the crowd towards Magnus, sure in his conviction and feeling proud.

“Hey,” Magnus whispered as Alec came to stand in front of him, the tips of their shoes just touching.

“Hey,” Alec replied just as quiet, smiling from ear to ear.

“So, um, ‘Gideon’, huh? I was just–”

“Shut up, Magnus,” Alec said before grabbing the lapels of Magnus’ coat and surging forward, capturing his lips with a satisfied moan.

Magnus froze for a second before relaxing into the kiss and closing his eyes, putting one arm around Alec’s waist and the other up Alec’s back and into his hair. Alec tilted his head and moved his lips against Magnus’, smiling when Magnus made a soft noise at the back of his throat. The kiss wasn’t gaudy and passionate. It was slow and sincere, intimate and sweet, conveying the ache they both felt for each other. Kissing Magnus didn’t make fireworks go off in Alec’s head or make him feel like he was going to explode. Kissing Magnus was like a breath of fresh air, like falling into a pile of fresh laundry, like watching the stars sparkle across the night sky. Alec felt like he was floating on a cloud and he would never come back down. This was the exact place he was meant to be all along, with Magnus, touching him, holding onto him, kissing him. Nothing had ever felt so right in the world until this exact moment. Alec wanted nothing more than to hold onto Magnus and kiss him like this forever.

Magnus pulled from Alec first, panting with his eyes closed. Alec leaned his forehead against Magnus’, smiling to himself.

“Wow,” Alec whispered, his breath taken away by the man in front of him.

“Yeah,” Magnus agreed.

“I choose you, Magnus. I’ll always choose you.”

Magnus opened his eyes and cradled Alec’s face in his hands, gazing into his eyes, overwhelmed by Alec’s declaration. He slipped his hands to the back of Alec’s neck and pulled the man in for another kiss with a wide smile.

Alec chose him. Alec was finally his.

Alec stood in the middle of his parents’ office, arms behind his back, shoulders tense. He was mentally preparing himself for whatever speech or berating his mother had in store for him. Behind him stood Jace and Isabelle and closest to the door were Clary and Simon, all there as moral support. Maryse had her back to Alec, her arms folded across her chest, her body clearly rigid with anger. Alec felt like he had been standing there for hours when it had really been just a few minutes. He didn’t regret the kiss with Magnus for one second, but he didn’t really consider the aftermath and dealing with his mother’s wrath.

Maryse spun around, glaring at Alec, causing him to stand up straighter.

“By the Angel, Alec, what do you think you’re doing?” Maryse asked sharply, her nostrils flaring in fury. “In front of everyone we know.”

“The right thing,” Alec answered, looking straight back at Maryse, not allowing himself to feel the least bit intimidated.

Maryse slammed her hands down onto her mahogany desk. “The right thing would be you marrying Lydia.”

“I’m not going to marry someone I don’t love, Mother.”

“You _love_ him?”

“Not yet, but I will. Lydia told me to be happy and that’s what I plan on doing with Magnus.”

“Turning on your family for a warlock,” Maryse spat, like saying the last word was poison in her mouth. “A Downworlder will never make you happy, Alec.”

“He’s my soulmate. I think we will be fine.”

Maryse let out a small gasp and shook her head. “No…” She looked over pointedly at Isabelle. “You knew about this and you didn’t tell me?”

Isabelle looked away from her mother, ashamed. Jace spoke instead. “Maryse, Magnus is a good man. He will do right by Alec.”

Maryse snapped her head in Jace’s direction, glaring at him. “And what would you know? What good has your vampire soulmate done?”

Alec could feel the anger rising in Jace through their bond and put out his arm to stop Jace from doing something he would regret. “Mother, you have absolutely no right to say that about Simon. He may be a vampire but he is the most honest vampire I’ve met. He has helped us on missions, doing so much more than what has been asked of him. He has been a great friend and I trust him with Jace. Downworlders aren’t monsters, Mother. Stop treating them like they’re the dirt on the bottom of your shoe.”

Maryse was taken aback by her son talking back to her. “I don’t know who you are anymore.”

“I’m your son. I’m still me. Just because Magnus is my soulmate doesn’t change who I am. I’ve always done what you wanted. This time, I’m doing what I want.”

Maryse huffed and closed her eyes, trying to tame her fury with slow breaths before looking back at her son. “You’re going to regret this, Alec.”

Alec hummed and smiled. “No, Mother, I don’t think I will.”

“Fine, do what you want,” Maryse said, scowling, picking up her feet and quickly exiting the room.

As Maryse left, there was a collective intake of air as the tension left the room. Alec didn’t even realise how tense and stiff he had been until he felt his shoulders drop and all his muscles relax, his legs feeling a little weak.

“I’m so proud of you, brother,” Isabelle said with a loving smile, placing her hand on Alec’s back.

Alec turned to face his sister and pulled her into a hug. “I love you, Izzy.”

Isabelle giggled, pushing herself back from Alec. “I love you too, Alec.” She placed a kiss on Alec’s cheek then left the office with Clary.

Alec turned to face Jace, seeing his parabatai smiling widely at him, a sense of pride settling in his chest. Jace put his hand on Alec’s shoulder as if to say ‘thank you’ and Alec pulled his parabatai into a short, tight hug, thumping him once on the back with his fist. Jace pulled back and went to leave the room, pausing at the door to wait for Simon to follow him.

“Thank you so much, Alec,” Simon said, flitting to stand in front of Alec. “Thank you for speaking up for me.”

“It was nothing.”

Simon shook his head. “No, it’s not nothing. I know what most Shadowhunters think of Downworlders and I honestly thought you were kind of the same, only tolerating me because I was with Jace. It really means the world to me that you approve of me and Jace. He is important to me and you’re important to him.”

“I know I haven’t always been the friendliest towards you, Simon, but I know you make my brother happy. All I want is for him to be happy.”

Simon smiled and grabbed Alec’s sweater, pulling him in for a crushing hug. “Thank you for everything, Alec.”

“Woah, um, okay, I don’t think we’re close enough to be hugging,” Alec said, his arms held out awkwardly.

“Oh, right,” Simon said, stepping back and straightening his clothes. “Sorry.”

Alec chuckled and then gave Simon a serious look, but his eyes were full of mischief. “If you hurt him, I will hunt you down, drain you of blood and let you die slowly.”

Simon’s eyes widened in alarm for just a second until he broke out in laughter. “I promise you will never have to resort to that.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll kill him first,” Jace casually mentioned from behind Simon with a smirk. “Come on, Si, we should go.”

Simon rolled his eyes and grabbed onto Jace’s hand. “Thank you again, Alec. I mean it.”

Jace dragged Simon out of the room who gave Alec one last wave.

As soon as he was alone, Alec felt like he could truly breathe and relax. He knew his mother was going to be harsh, he had expected it, but that didn’t make it easier for him to process her disappointment in him. It was the first time Alec had ever experienced his mother being explicitly angry at him, and it was a whole new experience. It was both nerve-wracking and exhilarating at the same time. Alec may have been scared of losing the respect of his parents, but it felt so freeing to be able to do something for himself for once. He was no longer forcing himself to be confined to the family values and it was so liberating to have the chance to make decisions for himself based on _his_ needs and wants, not on what everyone else expected of him. Alec didn’t realise how much he needed this newfound freedom, until now.

A knock at the door and Magnus’ head popping in brought Alec out of his thoughts.

“Is this a bad time?” Magnus asked.

Alec shook his head and grinned. “No, please come in.”

Magnus glided into the office towards Alec, closing the door behind him and glancing around at the dark, dull room. “Alexander, darling, you need a better decorator.”

Alec laughed. “When it becomes my office, you can decorate it for me.”

Magnus’ eyes twinkled at that idea. “So, did Maryse tear into you? Or is she happy to have me as a future son-in-law?”

Alec cocked an amused eyebrow at Magnus. “It’s a bit early to be thinking about marriage, isn’t it?”

“A man can dream,” Magnus replied, shrugging. “So, your mother?”

“Let’s just say she would have been happier if I kissed a frog and it turned into a prince. Don’t worry, she’ll come around.”

Magnus held Alec’s hand in his, his thumb caressing the back of Alec’s hand. “Do you regret it?” the warlock asked, his voice shaky.

“Hey, Magnus, look at me,” Alec said tenderly, putting a finger under Magnus’ chin and lifting his head. “I will never regret you. I am so sorry about being so indecisive and not telling you about the engagement and just being a terrible person overall. You deserve so much better than me –”

“No, Alex–”

Alec shook his head. “You know it’s the truth. I’ve been horrible to you. But I care about you and what we have too much to let you go. There are things our souls want, and mine wants you.”

“Oh, Alexander,” Magnus breathed out, stepping in closer to Alec and placing a soft, lingering kiss on his lips. “Thank you.”

“I meant what I said, Magnus.” Alec rested his forehead against Magnus’, feeling the warlock’s soft breath on his face. “I choose you.”

They stood like that for a few minutes, holding onto each other and relishing in the comfort that only the other person could provide. Alec’s heart felt calm and at peace, all the pain gone as if it had never existed at all. Everything was right.

“You never cease to amaze me, Alexander,” Magnus commented, pulling his head back from Alec’s. He slowly ran his hand through Alec’s hair, settling at the base of Alec’s neck, his thumb rubbing over Alec’s cheekbone. “It’s going to be tough for us out there.”

“I know.”

“What will you do?”

“I’m going to fight for us. I want this. I want us.”

“Would this an appropriate time to ask for a proper date?” Magnus asked, his smile beaming.

Alec chuckled and shook his head in amusement. “I guess I do owe you one, after all.”

“How about–”

Alec’s head snapped up as the blaring red alarms of the Institute went off, deflating when he realised he had to leave Magnus to deal with another demon attack. He groaned and sighed in annoyance.

“My father really has the worst timing,” Magnus grumbled, glaring at the flashing red light.

“Raincheck?” Alec suggested.

Magnus ran his thumb across Alec’s cheek again. “Don’t worry about me. Go fight your demons, Alexander. I’ll be waiting for you.”

Alec smiled and leaned forward, capturing Magnus’ lips, before pulling back and placing a kiss on Magnus’ forehead.

“You’ll come back, right?” Magnus whispered.

“For you?” Alec grinned. “Always.”

And as Alec ran off to prepare himself to fight another demon swarm, he took part of Magnus’ heart with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	12. Slip Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 12, here we go!
> 
> HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR EVERYONE!! Culturally, I'm Vietnamese and this is one of my most favourite times of the year! I hope everyone has an amazing Year of the Ox :)
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all enjoy this chapter!
> 
> Happy reading!

It was supposed to be like any other mission. But things didn’t always go according to plan.

There were a lot more demons than expected and Alec moved as fast as he could, shooting them down with his bow and arrow while Jace sliced through them with his seraph blade. In the distance, he could see Isabelle reeling the demons in with her whip and Clary piercing them with her short sword. Lydia and Underhill were standing back-to-back as they fought and stabbed demons charging at them. Alec’s breath was coming in heavy as he shot down two more demons, seeing them disintegrate into ash. He must have injured his arm because he could feel a slight searing pain, but he chose to ignore it. There were more important things to worry about than a simple arm injury.

Alec saw a demon charging at him with its mouth wide open, screeching loud and angry. He lifted his bow and arrow, taking aim, and when it got close enough, Alec let the arrow go, piercing right through the middle of the demon. Jace yelled out his name from behind him and he turned, only to see Jace jumping in front of him, a demon tendril thrusting into Jace’s body. Alec’s eyes widened as he grabbed Jace’s seraph blade out of his hand, thrusting it into the demon and watching it disappear.

“Jace! Hey, Jace!” Alec called, pulling his parabatai close to him as they sank to the ground. “What the fuck did you do?”

Jace smiled and coughed up some blood, his hand clutching at his stomach. “Had to save your ass,” he rasped.

“Fuck, Jace. What were you thinking?”

Alec lifted up Jace’s shirt and saw a large wound on the side of his abdomen turning black. He grabbed his stele from his thigh holster and activated Jace’s iratze rune, but the wound didn’t close, only seeming to get worse. Alec tried again and again, but as seconds passed, he saw small dark lines under Jace’s skin slowly moving out from the wound. _Demon venom_.

“Come on, Jace, stay with me,” Alec urged as he lightly slapped Jace’s face. Jace’s eyes were slowly closing as the venom in his body was taking over. “Fuck, Jace, come on. You can’t leave me.”

“’S okay, Alec,” Jace slurred, coughing up more blood before passing out.

“Jace, no! You have to wake up!” Alec shouted, shaking Jace’s body, but his parabatai didn’t open his eyes. He couldn’t have Jace die, not like this, not ever. They were both in this together from beginning to end. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

Alec felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Isabelle and Clary by his side. He didn’t even realise he was crying until Isabelle wiped away the few tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Alec, pull yourself together. Take him to Magnus,” Clary said, her tone serious.

Right, of course, Magnus. Magnus, his soulmate, a very powerful warlock. Of course, Magnus could help Jace. Magnus could make Jace better. Yes, take Jace to Magnus.

Alec put one arm under Jace’s back and the other under Jace’s legs, picking him up off of the ground like he weighed nothing. The burning on Alec’s arm came back for a few seconds, but again, Alec ignored it. His parabatai was dying in his arms and he didn’t have the energy or time to be worrying about himself at this very moment.

“We’ll take care of this,” Isabelle said. “Go. Now.”

Alec nodded and silently thanked his sister before running as fast as his legs could take him to Magnus’ apartment.

Alec sat on the edge of the leather couch in the middle of Magnus’ living room, elbows on his knees, hands clasped tightly together. His knee was bouncing rapidly out of pure anxiety over the fact that Jace was going to die. He could feel the parabatai bond getting weak and the fact that he couldn’t do a single thing in this situation to help made him feel worse. He closed his eyes and prayed again. He didn’t know who he was praying to, be it the Angels or God or some other deity, he just needed one to listen to him. Alec needed Jace to be okay. Losing the one person who had been by his side from the beginning, training with him, fighting with him, laughing with him, and crying with him, he just couldn’t imagine it. Jace was a part of Alec and he didn’t know how he was supposed to live if there was a big, gaping black hole where Jace was supposed to be.

Magnus stepped out from behind the door of his guest bedroom panting and looking haggard. He had discarded his jacket and had his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Alec hadn’t been keeping track on how long Magnus was working on Jace but now that the sun had set, Alec knew it had been at least a few hours.

Alec jumped up from his seat and rushed over to Magnus, guiding the warlock over to the couch to rest. Magnus sat down on the couch with a relieved sigh, leaning back against the cushions and closing his eyes, pinching his nose.

“Are you okay?” Alec asked worriedly.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” Magnus replied, waving a lazy hand at Alec. “Demon venom is a bitch, but I got rid of it.”

“He’s okay?”

Magnus nodded. “He’s okay,” he answered, knowing just how much Alec needed to hear the words come out of his mouth.

Alec sagged in relief. Jace was okay. Thank the Angel. “He’s okay,” Alec repeated quietly to himself.

“Give him a few days to regain consciousness and he should be fine,” Magnus said, sitting up straight and flexing out his fingers, frowning when he saw only a few blue sparks that faded as quickly as they appeared.

Knitting his eyebrows in concern, Alec took Magnus’ hands into his own, squeezing them lightly. “Magnus, how much magic did you use for this?”

“You know, I like it when you hold my hands, Alexander.”

“Magnus.”

“Who knew there was this spark every time soulmates held hands? We should do it more often.”

“Stop deflecting, Magnus. How much magic did you use for this?”

Magnus looked away from Alec’s serious expression and laughed awkwardly, pulling one of his hands away to rub at the back of neck. “Well, you see, my magic levels may currently be depleted. Just a tad. Nothing a little rest won’t fix.”

“By the Angel, I’m so sorry,” Alec apologised. “I wouldn’t have asked for your help if I knew it was going to leave you vulnerable like this.”

“Hey, Alexander, no,” Magnus said, cupping Alec’s chin in his hand. “Look at me. I chose to help you because it’s you. You didn’t ask me to do anything. I know how important Jace is to you.”

“But Magnus I–”

Magnus shook his head. “But nothing. I chose to do this. Also, if helping Jace brings you to my place more often, I’ll help him whenever he wants.”

Alec snorted. “You really think this is a time to be joking around?”

“Darling, life is too short to sit around and be serious and miserable. I thrive on joy and excitement.”

“Thank you, Magnus, really,” Alec said, squeezing the warlock’s hand again.

“Alexander, I would do anything for you,” Magnus said as he ran his free hand through Alec’s hair.

“You shouldn’t offer me something like that.”

“It’s the truth, though. I really would.”

Alec smiled. He slowly leaned forward, glancing at Magnus’ lips, tongue darting out to lick his own, only to stop when felt that searing pain on his arm again. He hissed and clutched at his arm as a trail of blood made its way down, the burn getting stronger.

“Alexander, you’re bleeding!” Magnus exclaimed, lifting up the sleeve of Alec’s shirt to see a six-pointed sat with overlapping lines carved into Alec’s arm. “He knows.”

Alec winced and looked at his arm, seeing Asmodeus’ pentagram. “Who knows what?”

“My father knows about you,” Magnus explained as he tried to use the little amount of magic he had left to heal Alec.

“Magnus, no.” Alec grabbed Magnus’ wrist to get him to stop, hissing again when he felt the burn in his arm. “Don’t waste your magic.”

“I’m not going to let my soulmate sit on my couch while they’re injured and bleeding when I know there’s something I can do to help,” Magnus protested.

Alec pulled his stele out of his thigh holster and activated his iratze rune, watching the bleeding lines of the pentagram on his arm slowly stitch back together, leaving behind blank skin. “See? I can take care of myself just fine. What did you mean when you said that your father knew about me?”

“I don’t know how he knows, but I think he knows you’re my soulmate. He put that mark on you as a warning, to me.”

“Warning you about what?” Alec asked, creasing his eyebrows.

“He’s coming for me,” Magnus declared, standing up and pacing back and forth across the living room. “It really took him 400 years to decide it was time for him to come after me. This is ridiculous.”

“Magnus, what are you talking about?”

Magnus stopped pacing and faced Alec, opening his mouth to say something, but chose to shake his head instead.

Alec stood up and walked over to Magnus, placing his hands on the warlock’s hips. “Hey, whatever it is, you can tell me.”

Magnus started biting on one of his nails and Alec grabbed his hand, pulling it down to get him to stop.

“Magnus, please trust me when I say that I’m not going anywhere.”

Magnus looked down at the space between them “I’m not proud of my past, Alexander.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Alec promised, putting a finger under Magnus’ chin and forcing him to look at him.

Magnus sighed and nodded. “When I was a boy, my mother… killed herself because she realised she gave birth to an abomination. She couldn’t live with herself and my stepfather blamed me for her death, abusing me for days on end. One day, my stepfather tried to end my life by drowning me and I… I didn’t want to die, Alexander.” A soft sob escaped Magnus. “I heard a voice and at the time, I didn’t know it was Asmodeus. He told me a spell and I killed my stepfather by burning him to a crisp.”

“Oh, Magnus,” Alec said softly, wrapping his arms around Magnus.

“I am a monster, Alexander,” Magnus sobbed, sounding tormented. “I killed my mother and stepfather.”

Alec pulled back and cupped Magnus’ cheek, gazing deeply into his eyes. “No, Magnus. You’re the furthest thing from a monster. You’re kind and generous and a little bit eccentric, but you’re certainly no monster. You lived the best you could with the circumstances you were given. None of that was your fault.”

Magnus looked into Alec’s eyes and could see nothing but sincere truth in them, sighing in relief. He smiled at Alec and pecked his lips as a silent ‘thank you’.

“My father said that one day he would come back and claim me,” Magnus explained.

Alec took a deep breath and pulled Magnus in again, wrapping his arms around tighter. “Whatever happens, I’m with you through all of this. He can’t take you and I won’t let him.”

Magnus slid his arms around Alec and breathed him in. “I’m not going anywhere,” he promised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	13. Take It All

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 13, here we go!
> 
> This is more Alec and Jace than it is Alec and Magnus. I love writing best friends so I hope you enjoy this.
> 
> Happy reading!

It had been four days, and Alec was spending much of his time running between the Institute and Magnus’ apartment. He was working with his sister and Underhill on a plan to stop Asmodeus, though they knew there was not much they could do, considering a Prince of Hell had never infiltrated Earth like this before. The demons were wreaking havoc, going from just scaring mundanes to a few possessing them instead. Through Luke and Raphael, Alec was able to get some much-needed assistance from the werewolves and vampires in protecting the city, but there was only so much they could do when it came to protecting humans. The protection of their clans was the top priority for them. Alec had tried to reach out to the Seelie Queen for her help but being that her and her people were in their own protected realm, she had no interest in protecting humans. She had given Alec a melodious laugh and stated she would rather sit by and enjoy the show. A Prince of Hell coming to Earth and a warlock in danger were the least of her worries.

Despite Maryse’s disappointment in her son, she had decided to take a step back from her position and temporarily hand over the reins of the Institute to Alec, allowing him to run it as if she were away in Idris. Alec continued to function as normal as he possibly could, but he could always feel his mother’s eyes on him, watching his every move, and it made him unnecessarily nervous. Maryse had hardly talked to him since the announcement of his not-engagement, but she also never expressed any anger towards him. She would just look at him, face void of any emotion. He tried to not let her actions affect him, but he missed having his mother be his mother. Isabelle would try to reassure him that things were fine and to give his mother time to get used to the soulmate situation. Alec was fine with that, but he mostly just wanted his mother to talk to him. He tried to not let his strained relationship with his mother affect his job, but it was constantly there in the back of his mind.

On top of all of this, Jace had yet to wake up and Alec was getting anxious about if he ever would. Through their parabatai bond, Alec knew that Jace was as far away from dying as he could be, but Alec wasn’t going to be assured until Jace woke up. Alec was at Magnus’ apartment constant to check on Jace and make sure that his parabatai wouldn’t just simply die without so much as a warning. Magnus never said it, but Alec knew that the warlock enjoyed having Alec over at his place, even if it was under not the best circumstances. During those moments with Magnus, Alec allowed the warlock to take care of him. He fed Alec when he would skip meals. He let Alec shower and nap at his place when he felt the need to have an escape from the Institute. He gave Alec massages when he could tell his soulmate was wound up and tense. And sometimes, when they were supposed to be watching a movie, Alec let Magnus take his breath away with kisses that eased away all the stress.

“Please wake up for me, Jace. Please,” Alec heard Simon beg with a sniffle from behind the door of the guest bedroom.

Alec sighed and knocked on the door, opening it to see Simon looking at him with teary eyes. “Hey, you should go get some rest.”

Simon wiped away the tears from his eyes before grasping tightly to Jace’s hand. “I can’t leave him, Alec. He wouldn’t leave me.”

Alec placed his hand on Simon’s shoulder and squeezed. “He wouldn’t want you to sit here all day and night. He would want you to take care of yourself and get some rest. Magnus has blood bags in the fridge. You can sleep on the couch so you don’t have to be far. I just want you to get some sleep. Jace would want that too.”

“Alec, I can’t just–”

“I’ll watch over him. I’ll be here the whole time. Magnus is out with a client so there’s nothing to distract me,” Alec joked, hoping to lighten the mood a little. “Please get some sleep, Simon.”

Simon closed his eyes and sighed, thinking about it for a few seconds, before nodding. “Okay, just an hour or two.” He stood up and leaned down to give Jace a lingering kiss on his forehead. “You have to tell me if anything changes.”

Alec nodded.

Simon gave Jace’s hand one last squeeze before letting go and walking to the door. “Thank you, Alec,” he said before leaving the room.

Alec took the seat next to the bed that Simon was sitting in and looked Jace up and down slowly. Jace looked perfectly healthy and at peace, like he was just sleeping. There wasn’t a single scratch on him, courtesy of Magnus, and the colour in his skin was back, no longer pale. He looked like a regular Shadowhunter having a rest after a long, tiring mission. Alec wished that were true. He knew Magnus had said it would take a few days for Jace to wake up but with each day that passed, Alec felt worse with worry. He couldn’t help but think of the worst.

Growing up with Jace had never been easy. The young boy was insanely talented and made everything he did seem like it was the easiest thing in the world. Alec spent hours upon hours training to even reach half of Jace’s level. It took Alec months to perfect his use of a seraph blade and even longer to perfect his skill with a bow and arrow. It wasn’t easy but, in a way, Jace was Alec’s motivation to improve, to become an even better warrior. The thing was, Alec should have hated Jace, he should have been jealous of this kid that came into his family and was exceptionally better than he was. But Jace was always there, by Alec’s side, helping him practise, giving him advice, healing his wounds after a long session of getting beat by Jace. It didn’t matter how cocky or annoying Jace could be, Alec knew he wanted the boy as his parabatai.

Alec sighed and took Jace’s hand into his own, leaning his forehead against their clasped hands.

“You idiot,” he mumbled. “You stupid, irresponsible idiot. What did you think you were doing? You should have just let that demon get me. It would have been better for me to die than you. You’re so stupid.”

Alec paused and thought about what he wanted to say next, not sure if Jace could even hear him or not.

“You know, when I first met you, I kind of hated you,” Alec continued. “You were Jace Herondale, the golden boy of Idris. Everyone wouldn’t stop talking about you and I thought you were going to be another annoying kid. Growing up with you taught me I was right. You were another annoying, insufferable kid. But I got to know you in a way no one else did. I saw you were also scared as you were brave. You were as kind as you were conceited. You were as clumsy as you were talented. You were as impulsive as you were smart. You became more than my brother and I never looked back. I hate you for being this stupid. By the Angel, Jace, wake the fuck up so I can kill you myself.”

“Here I was thinking the whole time that you loved me.”

Alec’s head snapped up in the direction of Jace’s rough voice to see his parabatai’s eyes half open and a dopey smile on his face.

Alec stood up abruptly and, without thinking, pulled Jace into his arms, hugging him tightly. “Fuck, Jace, you’re awake.”

“Yeah, Alec, water,” Jace croaked, coughing into Alec’s shoulder. “Please.”

“Fuck, sorry,” Alec apologised, helping Jace sit up in the bed before grabbing the glass of water sitting on the bedside table and holding it to Jace’s lips. “Here. Take it slow.”

Jace sipped the water from the cup and sighed in bliss. “That’s so good, you have no idea. How long was I out?”

“Four days.” Alec put the glass of water back in its original position before sitting back down in the chair. “Jace, what the fuck do you think you were doing?”

“I couldn’t let you die, Alec,” Jace said, shrugging.

“And what? You should die instead?”

“Well, I’m not dead, am I?”

“Jace.”

“Look, Alec, I saw the demon coming for you and, on instinct, I jumped. If I had to do it again, I would. You’re my parabatai and if I have to end my life to save yours, I would.”

Alec pinched his nose and shook his head, letting out a frustrated breath. “You really have a death wish, don’t you? Simon has been distraught over you.”

“Fuck, Si. How’s he doing?”

“I made him go sleep on the couch. He hasn’t left your side.”

“Thank you for taking care of him, Alec.”

“You’re lucky I love you.”

Jace cocked an eyebrow at Alec. “I thought you hated me.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “Shut up, idiot.”

“Hey, what’s that?” Jace asked, tilting his head to the side, eyes focusing in on Alec’s neck.

Alec’s eyes widened as he slapped a hand over the side of his neck, covering up a very obvious purplish mark, as the blood rushed to his face. “Uh, I fell.”

Jace smirked. “On your neck?”

“Shut up,” Alec grumbled, dropping his hand.

“So, while I was laying in this bed unconscious, you were getting some action in the next room?”

“Jace,” Alec said sharply.

“I’m your parabatai, Alec. We should be comfortable enough to talk about our sex lives.”

“I didn’t realise that was a requirement.”

“I’m making it one.”

“By the Angel, how are you already this annoying when you’ve just woken up from a near-death experience?” Jace laughed at that and Alec couldn’t help but smile at his parabatai. “I’m really glad you’re okay.”

“Me too,” Jace said, holding onto Alec’s hand.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, relieved to be in each other’s company. All that mattered was that Jace was alive and awake. Part of the pressure Alec had been feeling for the last few days had lifted and he felt like he could breathe easy again. His parabatai had come back to him and he no longer felt lost. A moment of tranquillity settled between them and honestly, Alec _lived_ for it. This was what he needed.

The peace was broken as the bedroom door was ripped open by a panting Simon.

“Jace!” he shouted as he flitted immediately to Jace’s bedside, roughly pulling the Shadowhunter into his arms.

“Yeah, hey, Si. I can’t really breathe,” Jace rasped, patting Simon on the back.

“Oh my G- I’m so sorry,” Simon apologised, pulling back and holding Jace’s face in his hands and looking into his eyes. “You’re awake.”

Jace smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I’m awake.”

Simon hit Jace’s arm. “Don’t ever scare me like that again!”

“Hey! Is this how you treat your boyfriend who almost died?”

“Yes! Because he didn’t keep his promise.” Simon sniffled and Jace softened his expression, placing his hand against Simon’s cheek.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I’m here now, okay?” Jace said, leaning up and kissing Simon’s lips.

Alec took that as his cue to leave, closing the bedroom door softly behind him. He leaned back against the door, his body sagging as he closed his eyes and let out a long sigh of relief.

“You need rest, darling.”

Alec opened his eyes to find Magnus standing in front of him dressing in a simple navy-blue suit, pressed white shirt and maroon tie.

“You’re back,” Alec breathed out, throwing his arms around his soulmate, breathing in his familiar sandalwood cologne.

“If this is the greeting I get every time I come home, I should leave more often,” Magnus chuckled and put his arms around Alec, smiling into the Shadowhunter’s shoulder.

“It’s just been a really long day,” Alec said, relaxing into Magnus’ hold. “You make everything better.”

Magnus pulled back from Alec and took his hand, lacing their fingers together. “Come on, you should get some sleep.”

Alec shook his head. “No, I need to get back to the Institute. We still haven’t found a way to stop Asmodeus. My sister and Clary and Underhill –”

“Can manage without you for a few hours. You deserve some rest, Alexander. I’m sure they don’t want you passing out in the middle of the Ops Centre, and neither do I.”

“But I–”

“Alexander.”

Alec bit his bottom lip. He knew he couldn’t say ‘no’ to Magnus. “Okay, just for a few hours. Then I have to go back.”

“I promise I’ll portal you back when you wake up.”

Alec nodded and followed Magnus into his bedroom, discarding his jacket onto the velvet armchair in the corner and kicking off his shoes before climbing into the bed, sighing as the gold silk sheets slid against his skin. He watched as Magnus clicked his fingers, immediately changing his clothes into a comfortable pair of pyjama pants, leaving his torso bare. Magnus slid into the bed and Alec instinctively curled up against him, trying to get as close as possible, smiling when he could hear Magnus’ calm heartbeat. Alec could already feel the drowsiness hit him, his eyes half open and blinking slowly. He guessed he really needed this after all. Magnus placed a soft kiss on Alec’s forehead and ran his fingers through Alec’s hair, nails scraping against his scalp in a comforting way. Alec let out a soft sigh.

“Sleep, darling. I’ll be here when you wake up,” Magnus said, his fingers carding through Alec’s hair once again.

Alec took a deep calming breath and closed his eyes, concentrating on Magnus’ soft humming of a lullaby. He easily drifted off to sleep as all the stress and tension of the last few days melted away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	14. Fear on Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 14, here we go!
> 
> Continuing with the plot :)
> 
> Happy reading y'all!

“What do you mean Asmodeus is after Magnus?” Jace asked, arms folded across his chest, a crease developing between his eyebrows.

Everyone – Alec, Jace, Isabelle, Clary, Simon, Lydia and Underhill – were all gathered in the Ops Centre around the maps table. They were all glad to see Jace back on his feet and being his usual self. The demon venom had exited his system and it was like he wasn’t even infected in the first place. It didn’t take long for Jace to be back in the training room holding a wooden staff against Alec’s neck, grinning smugly. Alec may have rolled his eyes and kicked Jace in the shin the next chance he got, but he was so relieved to see Jace back in the Institute.

Alec looked out at the hologram map in front of them, holding onto the edge of the table and leaning forward. “I don’t know what he wants but all Magnus said was that his father was coming for him.”

“How are we supposed to stop him?” Simon asked.

“We can’t,” Underhill answered, sighing. “We’ve looked through every book provided by Magnus and our own library here at the Institute. It seems like no one had ever had to deal with a Prince of Hell coming to Earth and destroying half a city. We can barely keep his demons contained right now with the amount of Shadowhunters we have.”

“I can send a request to the Clave and ask for assistance,” Lydia suggested. “Asmodeus is as much of a threat to the Clave than he is to us and mundanes.”

“But will they be willing to help a warlock?” Clary asked, concerned.

“It would be against the Accords to not help a Downworlder in danger,” Alec replied.

“Mr Lightwood, this would be one of those times the Clave is making an exception.”

Everyone turned around and immediately stood at attention as they watched Imogen Herondale make her way towards them. She was an older woman with her hair pinned back in a high bun, dressed in her grey Inquisitor robe which distinguished her and the position she held. A few of her runes and scars adorning her arms were visible, memories of long years of battle and war. She strode into the Ops Centre with an air of authority that most people would have been scared to challenge.

“Grandmother,” Jace greeted with a nod of his head.

“Madame Inquisitor, what are you talking about?” Alec asked.

“The Clave has decided to hand over Magnus Bane to Asmodeus.”

“Ma’am, you can’t do that,” Isabelle protested, stepping forward and holding onto her brother’s tense arm.

“And why not? I understand your… relationship with the warlock, Mr Lightwood, but if the Clave can trade one Downworlder for the safety of all mundanes, then it is what we will do.”

“With all due respect, Madame Inquisitor, Magnus is not just any Downworlder. He is my soulmate and I will _not_ be giving him up to his father,” Alec declared, staring the Inquisitor down.

“Unfortunately for you, Mr Lightwood, that is not your decision to make. We all must make our sacrifices for the greater good.”

“Grandmother, please,” Jace said, stepping forward and walking over to the Inquisitor. “Magnus is a friend and the Accords clearly state that–”

“This is the Clave’s decision and you will all follow orders. Am I making myself clear?”

Everyone was silent for a moment, looking between each other, conflicted between following their duty as Shadowhunters and doing the right thing by their friend. But ultimately, everyone, save for Alec, nodded, shame blanketing the room.

“Good,” the Inquisitor continued. “Mr Lightwood, you are to take Magnus Bane into custody. When the time comes, we will be handing him over to Asmodeus.”

As Imogen Herondale left the Ops Centre, Alec turned around and slammed his fists onto the maps table.

“I don’t care what the Clave says, we are not trading Magnus,” Alec asserted. “I will do this on my own if I have to. I am not letting Asmodeus take Magnus away from me.”

“I’m by your side, Alec.” Jace placed a hand on Alec’s back in support.

“Me too, brother,” Isabelle agreed, Clary and Simon nodding along with her.

“I don’t know what we’re going to do, but I’ll stand by you, Alec,” Underhill added.

Alec’s head turned to look at Lydia. “I understand your position. I don’t expect you to be a part of this.”

Lydia looked around at the group then sighed and shook her head. “We’re all going to the Gard for this…” she mumbled. “The Clave’s decision is wrong. No Downworlder should be treated like this. I’ll help you.”

“Thank you,” Alec sighed, and Lydia gave him a supportive smile.

“Alright,” Jace started, clapping his hands together to get everyone’s attention. “Now that everyone is on board, what are we going to do?”

“Like any other Prince of Hell, Asmodeus must have a demon core, right? If we hit that, we can banish him back to Edom,” Underhill suggested.

Clary nodded and frowned. “How will that stop him from coming back?”

“It won’t,” Lydia answered. “But it will give us time to find another way to stop him. If we can manage to attack him all at once and hold him down, one of us can stab his demon core.”

“This won’t be easy,” Isabelle commented.

Jace laughed. “Are our lives ever easy? Better to die trying than not try at all.”

“I swear to G- You better not do something stupid,” Simon piped up, hitting Jace upside the back of his head.

“Okay, it’s not much to go on,” Alec admitted, “but it’s better than nothing. We’ll have to work with what we’ve got.”

Everyone nodded at Alec and went on with preparing and making plans.

As Alec looked at his team, he had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, but he ignored it.

In the short span of his life, Alec had never been so resentful of the Clave and his duty as a Shadowhunter.

Alec had arrived at Magnus’ apartment with a small team of Shadowhunters following behind him. Magnus had looked so happy to see him, greeting him with a bright smile which immediately dropped as soon as Magnus noticed the other Shadowhunters. It probably took ten minutes at most, but it was one of the hardest ten minutes Alec had to get through. Telling Magnus he was to be taken into custody by the order of the Clave and putting the tight magic-blocking shackles around his wrists, looking at Alec like he had been betrayed, was pure torture for Alec. If following the Clave meant he had to be the person to hurt the people he cared about most, he didn’t want to do it anymore. The Clave were supposed to uphold the Accords, but here they were going directly against them. It was wrong and Alec was disgusted.

Magnus was brought to the basement of the Institute where all the prisoners were kept. The area wasn’t entirely well-lit, but it was enough to keep an eye on the prisoners who were locked inside their cells by key, code and wards to prevent any sort of escape attempt. The wards blocked out magic and so rendered any user of magic powerless. 24-hour security cameras watched over the entire area. Each cell had a small bed, which was just a thin mattress on a creaking metal frame, a sink and a toilet, all the basic necessities a prisoner needed.

Alec led Magnus to the cell assigned to him as he tried to ask questions about what was going on, but Alec chose not to respond, waiting until they were both alone. Alec kept his mouth tightly shut, tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth, to stop from giving himself away. The Inquisitor was watching him intensely and he couldn’t make one mistake that would give her any indication of him faltering or turning on the Clave.

“Thank you, Mr Lightwood,” the Inquisitor said as Alec pushed Magnus into a cell, undoing the shackles around his wrists. “Mr Bane, when the time comes, we will be giving you to your father.”

Magnus scoffed, his hands rubbing away the ache around his wrists. “And here I thought the Accords were to help protect Downworlders. I thought you followed the law, Imogen. If Will Herondale could see you now…”

“Mr Bane, do not speak to me of my ancestors. The Clave is doing what needs to be done to ensure the survival of our people and innocent mundanes.”

“What about innocent Downworlders? You may preach about the Accords, but we all know that if you had the chance, you would get rid of us. You’re no better than Valentine.”

“Mr Bane,” the Inquisitor spat, stressing out each syllable with disgust. “Do not compare the Clave to the likes of that traitor. I highly suggest you keep your mouth shut or I am more than willing to offer you to your father right now.”

Magnus gave the Inquisitor a vexed smile and bowed mockingly. “I apologise, Madame Inquisitor. I’ll make sure to only speak well of the Clave and all the amazing things they do for the Downworld.”

The Inquisitor huffed and turned on her heels, leaving to go back to the upper levels of the Institute.

“I detest that woman,” Magnus voiced with a sneer, taking a seat on the bed provided in the cell

“She’s Jace’s grandmother,” Alec pointed out.

“Is that supposed to make me like her?” Magnus asked, raising an eyebrow at Alec.

Alec opened his mouth then closed it, opting for rubbing the back of his neck and shrugging instead.

“Though, we don’t get to choose our family, and it is unfortunate that woman carries the Herondale name,” Magnus reasoned, sighing. “It’s been centuries and the Clave hasn’t changed one bit.”

“I’m so sorry about all this, Magnus,” Alec apologised as he got on one knee in front of Magnus, taking the warlock’s hands into his own. He rubbed his thumb over the marks on Magnus’ wrists left behind by the shackles, placing a soft kiss on each of them as a form of apology.

Magnus’ hand came to rest against Alec’s cheek, lifting his head so that Alec would look at him. “Alexander, darling, it’s okay. I know you had no choice.”

Alec shook his head. “It doesn’t matter what the Clave wants, I’m not letting him take you. I’m not losing you when I just got you.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Alexander,” Magnus promised. “I have no intention of allowing my father to have that type of power over me. The only way he will have me is if I’m dead.”

“Magnus, no.”

“Don’t worry, darling,” Magnus said, giving Alec a reassuring smile. “I also have no intention of dying either. We will figure this out, okay?”

Alec nodded, leaning forward and cupping Magnus’ face in his hands, connecting their lips and kissing him like his life depended on it.

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” Alec promised, that sinking feeling in his stomach returning.

It was on a regular corner in Brooklyn, small, old and somewhat dilapidated. There were pillars with peeling white paint and missing golden letters on the windows where the name of the shop should have been. Deep red curtains covered the inside of the windows, hiding what was inside. Alec took a deep breath and pushed open the door, hearing the bell atop the door jingle to indicate his arrival. He took one step and paused as he heard the wooden floor below him creak. Letting the door close behind him naturally, he took the time to glance around the store, noticing old leather-bound books and strange items and liquids in small glass jars. There were little trinkets laying around and in the middle was a round table covered with a burgundy velvet fabric. Tarot cards lay spread over the table.

Alec’s head snapped up at the sound of the metal spiral staircase in the corner creaking, revealing a small, elderly lady.

“I didn’t realise I had another appointment today,” she croaked as she got to the bottom of the stairs, hunching over and staggering her way to Alec. “What can I do for you, young sir?”

“Don’t you think the feeble old lady act is a little tired?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Stop with the act. I know you’re a warlock and you have the ability to channel spirits.”

The warlock scowled and straightened her back, clearing her throat. She took a seat at the table and gestured to the other seat with an extended arm.

“Haven’t been visited by a Shadowhunter in years,” she mentioned, her voice clear and regal. “What can I do for you, Nephilim?”

Alec sat in the seat opposite the warlock, eyeing her warily. “I need you to channel a demon for me.”

“Channelling a demon? That’s going to cost you. Who do you need to speak to?”

“Asmodeus.”

The warlock raised her eyebrows in intrigue. “Demon royalty? That’s going to be extra.”

Alec pulled a small black pouch out of his pocket and shook it, the coins inside jingling, before placing it down on the table and sliding it over to the warlock. The warlock gave Alec a satisfied smile and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before chanting in Latin, casting an intricate spell to call Asmodeus forward.

It didn’t take long, just a few seconds, for the warlock to open her eyes, revealing golden-green cat eyes.

“My, my, my, Alexander Gideon Lightwood. To what do I owe this pleasure?” a deep demonic voice said through the warlock’s mouth.

“Asmodeus,” Alec acknowledged, sitting up straighter in his seat.

“I have to say I am surprised to hear from you. What can I, a Prince of Hell, do for you, dear Shadowhunter?

“I need you to leave Magnus and Earth alone.”

Asmodeus let out an amused laugh. “Why would I do that?”

“I’ll give you anything you want.”

“So brave yet foolish. The Clave must be immensely proud of a Shadowhunter like you,” Asmodeus mocked.

“What do you want, Asmodeus?” Alec asked, not wanting to give into Asmodeus’ taunts.

“I want my son.”

“What else?”

Asmodeus let out an annoyed sigh. “You see, dear boy, I require my son’s immortality. Though, I doubt he will give that up so easily. What can you offer me that is just as important and meaningful?”

Alec furrowed his eyebrows, thinking deeply to himself. He knew that none of his possessions could even equal to the value of Magnus’ immortality, not even his precious bow and quiver.

“Oh, I know,” Asmodeus said, leaning on the table and grinning menacingly. “I’ll take you.”

“What?” Alec hissed, sending the demon a glare.

“Taking my son’s soulmate from him would be a mighty prize. Additionally, having some other company down here in Edom would be nice. It gets quite boring when all you’ve got are screeching demons to keep you entertained.”

“Magnus would never allow this.”

“And that’s why he will never know. Don’t tell him and come to me willingly. Seeing his face when you leave with me will be the icing on the cake.”

Alec clenched his jaw, his fingernails digging into the palms of his hands under the table. “If I do this, will you leave Magnus and Earth alone?”

Asmodeus rolled his eyes and sat back, waving a lazy hand. “Yes, yes. I promise not to hurt Magnus, your friends and all the pathetic little creatures in this realm.”

“How do I know I can trust you?”

“Well, that’s just something you’re going to have to find out,” the demon replied with a smirk. “Do we have a deal?”

Alec considered his options – which there weren’t really many options to consider. There was no way for the Shadowhunters to defeat Asmodeus, even with the plan his team had come up with. Dealing with a Greater Demon was never easy, and if he had to sacrifice one person for the greater good, he would always choose himself. It wasn’t necessary for Alec to think about his answer because he already knew what it was going to be from the moment the offer left Asmodeus’ mouth.

“Alright, I’ll go with you,” Alec agreed. “As long as you leave everyone alone, I’ll do whatever you want.”

“Marvellous,” Asmodeus replied with another menacing grin. “It’s been a long time since I’ve encountered such a self-sacrificing Shadowhunter. Having some company down in Edom will be very much enjoyable. Remember, if you tell my son about our little arrangement, the deal is off.”

Alec nodded. “I know. No one will know.”

“Perfect,” Asmodeus said as his cat eyes flashed with excitement. “I’ll be seeing you soon, Alexander. I look forward to our meeting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	15. Deep End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 15, here we go!
> 
> Today is the day I start my Masters degree and I'm super excited but also kinda nervous and scared and I'm really hoping all goes well. PRAY FOR ME LMAO
> 
> Anyways, there's some Magnus POV in this which I think is nice :)
> 
> Happy reading!

Days were passing by and Asmodeus had yet to open his final rift to create his pentagram and unleash his wrath on Earth. Tensions were at an all-time high and the anxiety amongst the group was growing. Even Jace was feeling it, and he never got anxious. This was not a normal situation. It wasn’t another rogue Downworlder going against the Accords or a stray shax demon terrorising some mundanes. This was the most powerful Prince of Hell coming to Earth in the most destructive fashion, and as much as they tried to be, no one was prepared for it. There was a blanket of fear covering the Institute and everyone tried their best to function as normally as possible.

Alec grew more and more frustrated as each day passed and the pressure on his shoulders was increasing. He tried to give his people a sense of normalcy, keeping everyone calm and focused on different tasks. But he could feel the worry and anxiety bubbling just under the surface of his skin. It had been days since he made the deal with Asmodeus and the demon had yet to show to take his payment. Waiting for Asmodeus was like a form of torture for Alec.

Magnus had been stuck in a cell this entire time without being able to use his magic and Alec could sense that his soulmate was feeling exhausted and disconnected from the world. It wasn’t normal for a warlock to be cut off from their magic, especially for days on end. Alec did his best to distract the warlock, spending time with him and talking to him. There wasn’t much Alec could do with the Inquisitor breathing down his neck and watching his every move. Imogen Herondale may have been Jace’s grandmother, but Alec had to agree with Magnus’ sentiment. He did not like the woman.

Alec tried to channel all his stress and emotions through training, spending long hours practising archery, even though he had already perfected his skill and aim. Alec’s bow was like an extension of him and he always felt strongest holding it in his hand. It was a weight that kept him grounded and when he was in battle, he never felt the need to worry if he had his bow in his hand. It gave him the ability to perform long-range attacks as he protected his siblings’ backs. It was always an important lesson instilled into Alec that he must protect his family, and his bow gave him the ability to do that. If Alec was to ever lose his bow, he would be losing a part of himself.

Arrow after arrow after arrow was hitting the large target in the distance, all missing the centre, and the frustration and tension inside Alec was not going away. If anything, it was getting worse and all he could do was grit his teeth and bear it. Alec knew that the deal he made with Asmodeus was the only thing he could do to save the people he cared about, but it didn’t make the decision to leave any easier. The thought of having to leave Magnus was stabbing at his heart and soul. The guilt of having to hide the deal from Magnus was tearing him up inside. But Alec had to do this. For the safety of the people he loved.

With sweat dripping down his face, Alec panted heavily as he dropped his arms, knowing there were no more arrows in his quiver. He stared at the target where none of the arrows had hit the bullseye and he gripped tighter onto his bow, his knuckles turning white. He lifted his precious bow above his head with every intention of throwing it at the mocking target in front of him, only to be stopped by a strong hold on his wrist. He glared down at the person stopping him and unconsciously growled.

“Alec!” Jace shouted, trying to break his parabatai out of his haze of anger. “Alec, hey, don’t do something you’ll regret.”

At hearing Jace’s voice, Alec shook his head and blinked, slowly calming down. His body sagged to the ground as Jace carefully took the bow out of his hand and placed it on the floor. Alec kept his eyes trained on the ground and took in slow breaths.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

Jace crouched down in front of Alec and placed a hand on his shoulder. “What’s wrong, Alec?”

“It’s nothing,” Alec replied, staring at the floor.

“It’s not nothing if you were willing to destroy your bow. We are parabatai. I can feel there’s something wrong, something you’re not telling me.”

“I wasn’t going to destroy it. I just–” Alec sighed. “Look, it’s nothing for you to worry about. I’m fine.”

Jace frowned. “Don’t lie to me, Alec. Not now.”

Alec shook his head and shrugged Jace’s hand off his shoulder. “I’m fine, Jace.” Alec tried to stand up to leave but was pushed down by Jace’s hand on his other shoulder.

“I don’t know what’s going on with you, and I know times are tough right now, but I need you to talk to me. We made an oath to each other, Alec. For whither thou goest, I will go, and where thou lodgest, I will lodge.”

Alec sighed exasperatedly and looked at Jace. “Sometimes life just doesn’t go the way you want it to. No matter how much you plan and work towards the future you want, it may never work out. There are sacrifices we have to make.”

“Is this about Magnus? Did he say something to you?” Jace asked hesitantly, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Don’t worry about it, Jace. Let it go. I’m fine.”

“Alec, please, I–”

“Jace,” Alec snapped, running a frustrated hand back through his hair. “Please let it go. You have nothing to worry about. I’m taking care of everything.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that I’m taking care of everything.”

“By the Angel, Alec,” Jace scowled.

“Look, I can’t talk about it,” Alec explained, irritated.

“I swear to all that is Holy, if you’re going to go off and get yourself killed or something, I’m going to kill you myself, right here, right now.”

Alec snorted and shook his head. “It’s nothing like that. I promise, Jace, I’m fine.”

Jace eyed Alec warily but nodded. “I’m trusting you, Alec. You know that no matter how tough things get, I’m always by your side.”

Alec gave Jace a grateful smile and pulled his parabatai into a hug. “I know. I’m sorry. Thank you.”

Jace tightened his hold on Alec, giving him a pat on the back before pulling away and clearing his throat. “Alright, no more sentimental stuff. You need to go take a shower. I don’t think Magnus would like the sweat.” Jace paused for a second then smirked suggestively. “Actually, maybe he would. He’s probably used to it by now.”

Alec punched Jace in the arm. “We were having a nice moment. Can you not be so… you?”

“You wouldn’t love me if I wasn’t me.”

Alec rolled his eyes and stood up from the ground, dusting himself off. “You’re lucky I love you at all.”

Jace stood up and laughed, picking up Alec’s bow and handing it to him. “You’re so cute when you’re being affectionate with me. Don’t make Magnus jealous, Alec.”

“Jace, shut up before I punch you in the face.”

Jace put up his hands in defeat and stepped back, an amused smile on his face, only causing Alec to roll his eyes again.

Alec walked over to the target, pulling out all the arrows, feeling much calmer than he did when he first walked into the training room. Jace always did that for him. He helped him work out his problems, or distracted him enough to forget, even for a moment. Jace knew how to deal with Alec’s emotions and the way he kept himself closed off to the rest of the world. Maybe it was the parabtai bond, or maybe it was the fact that they both had grown up together since they were children, but Jace knew Alec better than Alec even knew himself. Jace’s presence in his life was constant, and the thought of spending the rest of his life without his parabatai by his side hurt a lot more than Alec would have liked to admit. This was not a situation where one of them would be dead. Alec was always going to know that Jace was there, alive and well, but he would never be able to see him, to talk to him, to laugh with him.

Maybe Asmodeus was biding his time so as to torture Alec, to torment him, to make him realise everything he was going to give up. Alec couldn’t deny that the torment was working.

“I’m going to go take a shower. Maybe you should go do your job,” Alec ordered jokingly, grabbing his towel from the bench against the wall and taking a swig of water from his bottle.

“Yes, sir, Mr Head of the Institute, sir.” Jace gave Alec a two-fingered salute and grinned.

Alec shook his head and laughed to himself, turning and leaving the training room, trying to ignore the clawing guilt of lying to Jace.

It was safe to say that Magnus had been struggling. Time was moving exceptionally slow. Or was it moving fast? Magnus didn’t have a clue. He missed seeing the sun. Something so simple and yet, it made all the different to one’s day. He didn’t know how many days he had spent sitting in this ghastly, dull cell, staring at the grey wall, but it felt like an entire lifetime. Being unable to use his magic kept him so disconnected from himself and the world around him. He had never been so uncomfortable in his life.

The guards kept Magnus fed and clean, which may have been the bare minimum, but Magnus appreciated it nonetheless. The highlights of his days were when Alec would come visit him and there was not much they could do with the cameras watching, but they had moments where they talked and bonded and moments of silence where they just enjoyed each other’s company. It wasn’t much but these small moments were what Magnus treasured the most. Alec was a busy man and he always took time out of his day to see Magnus and distract him from the impending doom heading their way. A simple gesture on Alec’s part but Magnus appreciated it all the same.

Magnus had been waiting centuries for his soulmate. He moved from country to country, city to city, person to person, living his carefree life as a warlock, but not a single person captured his heart and soul the way Alec did. Magnus found comfort in other people through the years as his hope for finding his soulmate diminished little by little. Living an immortal life wasn’t easy when you spent more than half your time waiting and looking for someone you didn’t even know existed. It was easier to lose himself in people, drinking, games and entertainment. Ragnor would constantly warn him that he was destroying himself and it took a lot of work and intervention for Magnus to pull himself out of the dark hole he buried himself in. Magnus had almost given up on finding his soulmate until Alec appeared in his life and took his breath away.

Alexander Gideon Lightwood was handsome in an effortless sort of way. At first glance, he wasn’t at all what Magnus had imagined his soulmate would be like. Alec never styled his hair, leaving it scruffy and tousled from the moment he woke up till the moment he jumped into bed. He was always dressed in comfortable pants and shoes to make sure he was ready for any mission or attack. The only other items in his closet were grey or black sweaters with holes in them that he didn’t even bother to care about fixing. The man hated wearing colour because it was easier to blend into the night if he wore black, and demon ichor wouldn’t stain his clothes. He always had at least one weapon strapped to him and walked around with his stele hidden somewhere on his person because it was better to be cautious than not at all. Alec didn’t care much for his appearance because why would that matter when he spent his days hunting demons?

None of this necessarily mattered to Magnus. Alec may have been handsome with his chiselled jawline and tones muscles, but Magnus preferred Alec for who he was. The Shadowhunter was fiercely loyal and protective of the people he deemed important. He was righteous and if it called for it, he would blow up the very ground he stood on to make something right. It didn’t matter how young Alec was, he was a natural leader and even if people didn’t always agree with him, Alec had this air of authority around him that made people listen. Alec as a leader was so strong and confident, and Magnus thought it was beautiful. There were times when they would be alone and Alec would let his walls down, allow himself to be vulnerable around Magnus. These were precious moments Magnus held close to his heart. It was an honour for him to be the person Alec could be his true self around.

Every second spent with Alec was more valuable to Magnus than any of the years he had lived for over the past four centuries.

Magnus’ head snapped up when he heard the locks of his cell unlock and the door screech open. A familiar face popped in and a wide smile grew on Magnus’ face. He stood up slowly to greet his guest, his weak legs giving out under him and causing him to fall forward. Strong arms caught him before he could hit the ground.

“If I can be in your arms like this, I should fall over more often,” Magnus quipped, smiling up at _his_ beautiful Shadowhunter.

“Playing the damsel in distress, are we?” Alec said, cocking an amused eyebrow at Magnus.

“Does that make you my prince charming?”

Alec snorted and put Magnus back up on his feet. “Do you want to be a princess?

“I could be. Though, I don’t think that’s really your thing.”

Alec put a finger under Magnus’ chin and lifted his head, placing a soft kiss on his lips. “As long as you’re you.”

Magnus hummed. “You’re quite the romantic.”

“I thought you liked romance.”

“I do,” Magnus admitted, choosing to sit back down on the bed. “I just didn’t peg you for a romantic guy.”

Alec shrugged and sat down beside Magnus. “Maybe for you, I want to be.”

Magnus chuckled and rested his head on Alec’s shoulder. “Well, aren’t you sweet?”

“I try to be,” Alec said, leaning his head against Magnus’. “I know I ask everyday but, how are you?”

“As good as I can be, considering the circumstances. Imogen leaves me alone and the guards never speak to me. Isabelle and Clary visiting the other day was quite nice. Jace and Simon also came once and I, honest to God, wish I had my magic so I could have made them shut their mouths. But the best part is seeing you every day, so I can’t complain.”

“I’m sorry about all this, Magnus, I wish it didn’t have to be like this.”

Magnus took one of Alec’s hands into his and interlocked their fingers. “It’s okay, Alexander. I understand the position you’re in.”

“I’m still not letting them hand you over to Asmodeus. I don’t care if they throw me in the Gard.”

“Alexander, don’t say that. We are going to find a way out of this. There’s always a way.”

Alec sighed. “Yeah, you’re right, there’s a way.”

“Alexander?”

Alec hummed in response.

“I don’t think I’ve said it but thank you for choosing me,” Magnus said softly, playing with Alec’s fingers.

“What do you mean?”

“I know how difficult the decision was for you. Defying your family and choosing to be with a lowly Downworlder couldn’t have been easy.”

Alec sat up straight and turned to face Magnus, cradling his face in his hands. “Hey, you’re not a lowly Downworlder. And if I had to make the same decision again, I would do it in a heartbeat. You’re my soulmate, Magnus, and no one can take that away from me. I will always choose you.”

“You really know how to capture a man’s heart, don’t you?”

Alec shrugged and smiled smugly. “I try.”

Magnus chuckled and leaned forward to kiss Alec on his lips.

“Magnus,” Alec started, putting his arms around the warlock, “whatever happens with Asmodeus, I just want you to be happy.”

“What are you talking about, Alexander? I’m always happy when I’m with you.”

“If anything happens to me–”

Magnus pushed himself back from Alec and frowned. “Don’t say that.”

“I’m just saying, if anything happens to me, keep on going, okay?”

“Nothing is going to happen to you, do you hear me? Noth–”

“Hey, I’m so sorry to disturb you guys, but, Alec, you’re needed upstairs.” Isabelle’s voice startled the couple as they pulled away from each other.

Alec sighed and gave Magnus one more kiss before pushing from his knees. “Back to work, I guess.”

“Go fight your demons,” Magnus said, admiring the man before him. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Alec gave Magnus one final smile before leaving the basement with Isabelle, taking the rest of Magnus’ heart with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	16. Fire Meets Fate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 16, here we go!
> 
> idk what to say about this chapter but, dont hate me? lmao
> 
> Happy reading!

The blaring alarms of the Institute in the middle of the night had everyone jumping to their feet and rushing to grab their gear in preparation of an attack. Leather weapon holders were strapped on with seraph blades and swords attached to their hips. Knives and daggers were checked for their runes before they were slotted into thigh holsters alongside steles. Archers swung their quivers onto their back and checked their bow and arrows were runed up and ready to go. The few Shadowhunters who chose a spear or axe as their primary weapon had them strapped to their back. Everyone knew this battle was going _the_ one.

On the Inquisitor’s orders, guards grabbed Magnus from his cell and brought him up to the Ops Centre, his wrists shackled once again. Alec could see how ragged the warlock was, the dark circles under his eyes looking worse than they did the day before when Alec had visited him. Magnus had days on end without his magic and Alec felt responsible for how negatively it was affecting the warlock. Seeing Magnus physically weak, eyes sunken in, clothes in disarray, hair flat on top of his head, had Alec wishing he had taken Magnus and run away as far as possible to a location where no one could find them. Magnus never once blamed him, but it did not make it any easier for Alec to feel better about himself. Somehow through all this, Magnus still found it in himself to smile at Alec like nothing was wrong and Alec’s heart warmed and twinged at the same time.

Alec knew this day was coming and it felt like it had been coming for a long time. It had been just over a week since Alec talked with Asmodeus and Alec could only describe it as the longest week of his life. Saying his farewells to his family and friends without actually saying goodbye had to be one of the hardest things he ever had to do. The anger and sentimentality were still stirring inside of him, making Alec question if he was making the right decision. But he knew it was right. It was the only way to get Asmodeus to leave Earth and to protect the people he cared about. It still didn’t make the situation any easier for Alec.

With a collective deep breath, the Shadowhunters followed Alec through a portal to the middle of Times Square.

The archers sat on the rooftops waiting for movement while the other Shadowhunters, led by Lydia and Underhill, formed a circle around the rift, weapons in their hands, ready for an imminent attack. Alec, Jace, Clary and Isabelle surrounded Magnus, staying only a step away from him as they watched the rift closely. It was quiet. Too quiet. With the rift open, demons should have been pouring in, finding their way to Earth and easily destroying the city. But for what was only a few minutes, nothing happened. Not even a breath could be heard with everyone tense and on high alert.

That was when a quiet screech had grabbed Jace’s attention, his head whipping in the direction of the sound. He shared a look with Alec before carefully stepping closer to the edge of the rift, brows creasing as he noticed a small black figure circling at a rapid speed. His eyes widened as the realisation dawned on him, running back as fast as possible.

“Alec!” Jace shouted in warning. “Wraith demon!”

Alec sucked in a breath and lifted his bow as the wraith demon shot out from the rift, propelling into the sky.

“I’ve got it!” Alec called, holding his bow steady with two arrows aimed at the demon, his line of sight following the flight path the demon took.

He took a deep breath and closed one eye, watching as the demon flew between buildings, rolling its head and screeching loudly. Alec was waiting for the opportune moment to take his shot. The wraith demon seemed to notice Alec in the distance and changed its course, flying directly towards the Shadowhunter, its mouth open wide as the screeching got louder and louder. Alec took in another deep breath and relaxed his shoulders, easing his fingers and letting the arrows fly through his bow, perfectly piercing the demon. He sighed in relief as he watched the demon disintegrate into ash.

“Everyone, stay alert!” Alec ordered before turning around to face the rift. “They’re coming.”

Wraith demon upon wraith demon shot out of the rift, screeching and clawing at each other as they launched into the sky before separating and finding their way in between buildings and surrounding the Shadowhunters. The archers on the rooftops took aim and shot down as many wraiths as they could that were dominating the skies. The Shadowhunters on the ground had wraiths flying and charging at them as they worked in pairs or groups of three to take them down.

Alec kept Magnus close to him, knowing that the warlock was without his powers and utterly defenceless. He tried to shoot down what demons he could but protecting Magnus was his priority. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Isabelle reeling in wraith demon by its neck with her whip as Clary pierced it with her seraph blade. Alec’s feet twitched and moved on instinct when he saw Jace swinging his seraph blade around and fighting on his own, but his brain remembered his soulmate behind him, and he couldn’t leave Magnus all on his own.

“Go,” Magnus urged, noticing Alec’s internal conflict. “Your parabatai needs you. I’ll be fine.”

Alec shook his head. “No. I can’t leave you.”

“Alexander I’ll be fine,” Magnus repeated, looking pointedly at Alec. “Go.”

Alec furrowed his eyebrows in worry before nodding, knowing he could not leave Jace to fend for himself. There weren’t any demons aiming directly for Magnus but the thought of leaving the warlock alone and defenceless without his magic had the anxiety building up inside of him, but Alec tried to ignore it. His priority in this very moment was his parabatai, who, even though was panting heavily with sweat dripping down his face and looking exhausted, was doing quite fine battling the demons around him. The pure angel blood running through Jace’s veins certainly helped.

Alec raced over to Jace, shooting two arrows at a demon coming for his parabatai from behind as Jace stabbed his seraph blade through a demon he had managed to bring down to the ground. They stood back-to-back, Alec holding his bow high and Jace with his seraph blade twisting in his hand, spinning around and assessing the amount of wraith demons that were still alive.

“There’s too many of them,” Jace said, glancing over his shoulder at Alec.

Alec knew Jace was right. Even with the number of archers on the rooftops and the Shadowhunters on the ground, Asmodeus had sent a substantial amount of wraith demons to attack them. Asmodeus was tormenting Alec, having him see his friends and colleagues fight for their lives to protect a warlock and mundanes that didn’t even know the Shadow World existed. There were only so many times one could use the endurance and stamina rune until it got too much. The demons kept coming and Alec could see his people were struggling.

“We keep fighting,” Alec declared, shooting down another wraith demon barrelling towards them. “We protect the mundanes and we protect our own.”

Jace nodded and twirled his seraph blade in his hand, pulling out his axe from its holder with his other hand, holding them both in an attack-ready position.

In that moment, a column of fire shot out from the rift, heading straight up into the sky, causing every demon and Shadowhunter to freeze in their spot. Alec eyed the fire carefully as he saw a fuzzy dark figure move behind the wall of fire. Jace tried to hold him back but he took one step closer to fire, his instincts protesting against him, but Alec needed to confirm what he knew to be true.

Out of the fire stepped a tall, thin man with a human face, his pale skin seemingly stretched and pulled taut over bone. It was unexpected but he was dressed in a pure white suit with silver cufflinks and buttons carved in the shape of flies. A coronet of barbed wire adorned the top of his slicked-back black hair. He grinned menacingly revealing his sharp, pointed teeth as his golden-green cat eyes gleamed with evil.

Everyone flinched as the man lifted his hand, putting his thumb and index finger together. With a click of his fingers, the fire shot back down into the Earth and the wraith demons all barrelled into each other, flying back down into the rift and simply disappearing from the Earthly realm.

“Father,” Magnus gasped, taking as many steps away from Asmodeus as possible.

Alec and Jace were immediately by Magnus’ side with Isabelle and Clary not far behind.

“I’m so sorry I’m late. It seems like I was missing out on quite the party,” Asmodeus jested, glancing around at the exhausted Shadowhunters before allowing his eyes to land on Alec, grinning wider at seeing his prize.

“Asmodeus,” Alec acknowledged, pushing Magnus behind him.

“Ah, Mr Lightwood, how delightful to see you again. Won’t you let me see my dear son? It’s been so long.”

“Alexander, what’s he talking about?” Magnus asked, concern lacing his voice.

“Just stay behind me,” Alec said, quickly glancing back at Magnus, not having it in himself to answer such a simple question.

“I’m glad you kept to our agreement,” Asmodeus teased, his sharp teeth shining as they reflected the moon.

“You promised no one would get hurt.”

“And no one had been harmed, as you can see.” Asmodeus stretched out his arms, gesturing to the Shadowhunters surrounding him. “I am a man of my word, Mr Lightwood. Now, I expect you to keep yours.”

“Alec,” Jace hissed, his eyes darting between Alec and Asmodeus. “What the fuck is going on?”

Alec stayed tight-lipped, keeping his eyes on Asmodeus.

“Come along,” Asmodeus commanded, holding out his bony hand to Alec. “Or I could just kill all your friends right now.”

Alec sucked in a breath and looked at the thin, pale hand before him, biting his bottom lip. Alec had already made this decision once. To be honest, he felt like he had made it a thousand times over the past week and each time his choice was the same. The thought of leaving everyone, his friends, family, and Magnus, behind had him conflicted again in this very moment. Having them physically be there, watching him intensely as he struggled with the battle going on between his brain and his heart, made it more difficult for him to leave. But Alec knew he had to do this.

He slowly reached out a hesitant hand towards Asmodeus, only to be stopped by a grip around his wrist. It stunned him for a moment, his eyes tracing the person’s hand to the owner. He turned around to see Magnus with a crease between his eyebrows, confused and concerned. Magnus reached up the best he could with his shackled wrists and touched Alec’s cheek.

“Alexander, what did you do?” Magnus asked, his voice strained.

“I’m so sorry, Magnus,” Alec apologised, closing his eyes, not daring to look at the warlock. “It’s the only way to save you.”

“There’s always a price with my father, Alexander. What did you give him?”

“My dear son,” Asmodeus interjected, clearly amused by the whole situation. “Why, of course, he gave himself to save you and this pitiful realm.” He eyed Magnus’ shackles and tutted his tongue. “Seeing you like this is utterly deplorable, Magnus. I really expected better from my own son.” With a click of his finger, the shackles around Magnus’ wrists disappeared.

“You can’t take him, Father,” Magnus declared, pulling Alec beside him, feeling his magic slowly restoring in his hands.

“I believe Alexander can make this decision for himself, Magnus.”

“He’s not–”

“I’m going,” Alec announced without any hesitation.

“Alec, no,” Jace whispered, stepping forward, his hand on Alec’s shoulder.

Alec shrugged it off and shook his head. “I have to go.”

“Alexander, you don’t have to do this,” Magnus practically begged, holding on tightly to Alec’s arm. “We can find a way out of this. Together. Please.”

Alec pushed off Magnus’ hand and took a step closer to Asmodeus. “I’m sorry, Magnus. I have to do this. For everyone. For you.”

“No, no, no, Alexander, please,” Magnus pleaded desperately, holding out his hand, praying Alec would take it. “You can’t go. Not like this.”

Alec’s fingers twitched as he almost stepped forward, almost put his hand in Magnus’, almost changed his mind. The temptation was so strong, his fingernails digging into the palms of his hands. But his need to protect was stronger.

“I’m so sorry, Magnus,” he repeated, looking at the warlock with so much regret.

Alec went to stand at Asmodeus’ side, looking out at the Shadowhunters surrounding him. There were many confused and angry faces looking back at him. Clary was holding back a furious and distraight Isabelle who was fighting a losing battle to try to make her way to Alec. Jace stood frozen in his spot, clenching his jaw and fuming silently, his knuckles turning white as his gripped onto his weapons. Alec’s eyes locked with Magnus’ and seeing how desperate and shattered the warlock was made Alec’s heart clench and ache. All the sparkle and light in Magnus’ bright eyes were gone as pain and darkness took over.

“Can we just go?” Alec asked, knowing that the longer he stayed, the harder it would be for him to leave.

“Of course, dear boy,” Asmodeus said, sounding delighted. “Don’t you want to say your farewells to your friends?”

“Let’s just go,” Alec muttered, looking at the demon with disdain.

“You’ll come to learn that love is trivial, Alexander,” Asmodeus said, patting Alec’s cheek with his cold hand before clicking his fingers and bringing up the tower of fire from the open rift.

Alec ignored Asmodeus and turned to face the fire, barely feeling any heat from the tower. He could hear Isabelle calling out his name, but he couldn’t bring himself to look at her, his precious sister who had been there with him through everything.

“Children these days are so unappreciative,” he heard Asmodeus comment disapprovingly as the demon stepped into the fire.

Alec turned his head and looked over his shoulder, sharing one last look with Magnus.

“I’m sorry,” he mouthed before taking a deep breath and stepping into the fire, the flames licking at his skin but not burning him.

Magnus running towards him with tears in his eyes was the last thing Alec saw before darkness enveloped him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	17. Until We Go Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 17, here we go!
> 
> I don't know how I feel about this chapter I wrote, but I hope y'all enjoy it.
> 
> Happy reading!

The heat was unbearable, but he guessed it made sense for a dimension of Hell. Edom was as Alec had imagined. The sky was a constant mix of reds, oranges and yellows, like a fire was constantly engulfing what should have been the sky. The land was red and drier than a desert but still managed to have a few of what Alec could only describe as small black trees and shrubs. Nothing living and vibrant could evidently survive here. Wraith demons graced the sky with their incessant screeching whilst other demons roamed the land. How they managed to live here and survive, Alec did not know. Edom was bare and barren and somehow Alec had to spend the next fifty or sixty years of his life here.

Asmodeus’ keep wasn’t any better than the rest of Edom. It somewhat resembled a mansion on Earth, however it was extremely rundown with collapsing stones and bricks. Columns stood up tall around the keep, holding up a non-existent roof. There were large curtains draping over the fallen stones and cracked tiled floor. It surprised Alec that Asmodeus had furniture laying around his keep, furniture that reminded Alec of kings and queens of centuries ago. Asmodeus barely even had a door for his keep, essentially making it possible for anyone or anything to saunter in and attack. Though, being a Prince of Hell and ruler of Edom, Alec doubted Asmodeus had to worry about that.

Alec gazed out the glassless window of the keep, fiddling with one of his arrows between his fingers. He could see a wraith demon flying out there in the distance, circling round and round over barren land. Alec could feel that urge, that need inside himself, that duty he had as a Shadowhunter, to grab his bow and shoot the demon down, but he knew that his weapons would not work in this realm. Shooting the demon with his arrow would nothing but infuriate it. Alec wasn’t even supposed to be able to survive in Edom due to having only angel blood inside of him. The demon energy surrounding him should have killed him the moment he arrived in Edom. He could only assume that Asmodeus put a spell on him to keep him alive.

Time was passing by, but Alec didn’t know how fast or slow. He could have been there for 20 minutes or he could have been there for 20 days and he wouldn’t have known. There was no day or night in Edom, only a fiery red sky that seemed to burn and burn for days on end. He had yet to see Asmodeus since he arrived in Edom and woken up in the keep alone. Alec had no idea what he was supposed to do in a dreary place such as this. He had no interest in exploring Edom, not with demons out there who were more than willing to kill him, and he had no weapons that he could properly defend himself with.

Alec wasn’t necessarily bored, he was… antsy. He had nothing to do except plenty of time to worry. He worried about Jace and how he was coping with Alec’s absence. He worried about Isabelle and how broken she sounded with Alec was leaving. He worried about his parents and how they would react to finding out the news of him gone. He worried about Magnus, dear, sweet Magnus, who had invaded his life and stolen his heart before he even realised.

“Do stop moping, Mr Lightwood,” an all too familiar voice said, startling Alec out of his thoughts. “It’s so… sad. I don’t like sad.”

Alec watched as Asmodeus glided into his home, settling into a navy velvet armchair with gold accents.

“Where have you been?” he asked, partly interested, partly asking for the sake of having a conversation.

Asmodeus waved a lazy hand. “Oh, just here and there. Lilith tried to take advantage of my short absence on Earth and I had to go put her in her place. A scorned woman can be so vicious.”

Alec scoffed. “Yeah, you would know.”

“My dear Alexander, don’t judge me too harshly. I only do what needs to be done.”

“I’m not yours,” Alec said sharply.

“Oh?”

“I’m only here because I have to be. I don’t belong to you.”

“You are _my_ prisoner in _my_ realm. Does that not make you mine?”

“No. I’m just… here,” Alec said. He knew that technically he belonged to Asmodeus, but he wasn’t going to give the demon the joy of him admitting it.

“Mortals are so interesting,” Asmodeus commented casually. “Yet so boring at the same time. I don’t know how my son surrounds himself with them.”

Alec walked around the room and settled on the golden chaise lounge opposite Asmodeus, holding his arrow tight in his hand.

“Your son never had a family, thanks to you. The people he picks up along the way are his family. He surrounds himself with these people because they love him.”

Asmodeus scoffed. “Family and love. All unnecessary, idiotic mortal ideals,” he said with contempt. “Though,” he continued, a sinister smile growing on his face,” do _you_ love Magnus?”

The muscles in Alec’s body immediately tensed as he stared at Asmodeus in stunned silence.

“I can only assume that you would sacrifice yourself like this because you love him.”

It was not like Alec hadn’t thought about it.

Alec cared deeply for Magnus. By the Angel, he didn’t know how long it had been, but he missed Magnus. He missed the shining eyes that had seen centuries worth of history and the beaming smile that always seemed to make his legs weak. He longed for the smugness that came with the flirting and the laughs that made his world brighter. He yearned for the lingering touches and silent looks they shared that conveyed all the care and affection they had for one another. He ached for the silent moments when they would just hold each other, listening intently to their slow breaths and hearts beating in tandem. He desired to kiss Magnus again, just once, to feel those soft lips against his, melting down all the walls Alec built up inside him.

He cherished every moment he had with Magnus, whether it be them talking or sleeping or just looking into each other’s eyes. He adored the way Magnus would hum him a soft lullaby to help him fall asleep after a long day. He appreciated that Magnus was always there for him, to pull him into his warm embrace and take care of him when he needed it most. Alec wished he had never spent so much time denying Magnus so that he could have more time to experience and savour happy moments with Magnus.

Alec hadn’t a clue what being in love was, what it felt like. But if it felt like being on top of the world, or floating on a cloud, or running through a field of sunflowers or admiring the sun rise over the ocean, then maybe it was love. If it felt like a rollercoaster of emotions, bouncing from euphoria and exhilaration to anxiety and panic and then back, then maybe it was love. If it felt like an intense, overwhelming dose of joy slamming into his body, then maybe it was love. If it felt like being grounded and content as there was a sense of familiarity, then maybe it was love. If it was something that just felt right, then maybe it was love.

“Magnus is my soulmate,” Alec answered.

“That doesn’t answer my question, Mr Lightwood,” Asmodeus replied, seemingly amused.

“Magnus is my soulmate. How could I… not… love him?”

Asmodeus threw his head back and laughed. “Has anyone ever told you you’re a terrible liar?”

Alec sent the demon a glare. “Look, I just… don’t know.”

“Ah, that must break Magnus’ heart. My poor son has a soulmate who doesn’t love him back.”

“Magnus doesn’t love me.” Just saying that had Alec’s heart clenching in his chest.

“Oh, but he does, dear boy.” Asmodeus leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees and his fingers interlocking under his chin. “He hasn’t said it, but he certainly feels it. I can feel his longing and his pain from losing you to me.”

The thought of Magnus being in love with him sent a flash of elation right through Alec.

“I wonder how he will fair when you ultimately have to die,” Asmodeus mentioned, his smirk showing off his sharp teeth. “Mortal lives are so short, after all.”

And in a simple second, that elation in Alec utterly disappeared as the wheels in Alec’s head turned at the revelation. Magnus was immortal. Alec was not. Magnus would go on living his long life and Alec would be six feet underground. Dead. With everything going on, Alec never considered his relationship with Magnus and what it meant. How much did he really mean to Magnus if the warlock was going to go on living and maybe eventually find someone else? In a few decades, which would be a blink in time for Magnus, Alec would be old and weak. Would Magnus still love him then? What was the point in their relationship if Magnus was going to move on?

“Ah, I see, you haven’t discussed this with my son.” Asmodeus sat back and crossed his legs. He clicked his fingers and a glass of red wine appeared in his hand. He swirled it around before taking a sip. “Magnus will continue to live without you, Alexander. What will you do?”

“I am not discussing my relationship with you,” Alec refused, gritting his teeth, his fingers tightening around his arrow.

“Magnus will fall in love with someone else. What will you do?”

Alec’s shoulders tensed. His spine straightening.

“Wouldn’t that be disrespecting your memory?”

The tip of the arrow dug into Alec’s thumb, enough to draw a small amount of blood.

“Are you even his soulmate?”

“Fuck you,” Alec hissed, thrusting the arrow in his hand at Asmodeus, only to have the demon raise a hand and stop the arrow mid-air, surrounding it with red lines of magic.

“Mr Lightwood, this is not how you should be treating your host.” Asmodeus shook his head and tutted at Alec, dropping his hand and letting the arrow clatter on the floor.

“Maybe you should be treating your guests better.”

Asmodeus brought his glass to his lips and sipped. Alec could see the smirk the demon was clearly not trying to hide behind his glass.

“I was asking some simple questions,” Asmodeus stated, his tone so cavalier it irritated Alec to no end. “You should learn to control your temper.”

Alec scowled, digging his fingers into the edge of the chaise lounge. Normally, in a situation like this, Alec would leave. He would just simply walk away. But Alec had nowhere to go now that he was stuck in Edom, and that was frustrating in and of itself, without the addition of Asmodeus’ taunting.

“We’re going to have so much fun together,” Asmodeus mocked, a chuckle leaving his lips as he continued to drink his wine.

Magnus was infuriated.

It had been a week and no one had told him of a plan or even a passing idea to rescue Alec from his father’s clutches. Most people were acting like Alec was dead, like his sacrifice was unfortunate but it was a great sacrifice done in protection of the Clave. People went about their days as they normally would, sometimes passing the Lightwoods in the halls and telling them sorry and how honourable and heroic it was of Alec to sacrifice himself to protect everyone else. Sometimes people would give Magnus a look of pity, but they wouldn’t spare him even a word. He hated pity. Especially when that pity was unnecessary. Alec wasn’t dead. Alec was as far from death as he could be – at least that was what Jace had told him. Jace’s constant reassurance that Alec was alive and healthy kept Magnus somewhat sane, but there was only so much he could handle before he ultimately blew up at someone.

Magnus slammed his hands down on the mahogany desk in front of him, glaring at Maryse Lightwood as she stared him down.

“Why aren’t you doing anything?” he spat. “He’s your son.”

“How dare you?” Maryse snarled. “He’s down there because of you.”

“Mother, don’t blame Magnus,” Isabelle quickly interjected, stepping forward.

Maryse’s lip twitched as she looked at her daughter with contempt. “It’s this _warlock’s_ fault your brother is down there in Hell.”

“Maryse, Izzy’s right. Alec made this decision on his own,” Jace argued. “I don’t like it as much as the next person, but Alec did this on his own.”

Maryse’s head whipped over in Jace’s direction, her lips thinning. “How could you not know that your own parabatai would do something like this?”

“I didn’t–”

“Look!” Magnus interrupted, slamming the desk again. “We don’t have time to be playing the blame game. I don’t know what my father is doing to Alexander, but we need to get him out of there.”

“And what do you propose we do, warlock?” Maryse asked, her arms folding across her chest, looking down her nose at Magnus.

“None of us can go down there. We’ll die. We don’t have demon blood,” Isabelle said.

“I’ll go,” Magnus offered. “Asmodeus is my father. I’ll sort it out and I’ll bring Alexander back.”

“What will you give him?” Isabelle asked, her eyebrows creasing.

“Myself, if I have to,” Magnus declared.

“Magnus, you can’t do that,” Jace protested. “What Alec did would have been for nothing.”

“Well, what do you expect me to do?” Magnus asked sharply. “I can’t just leave him down there.”

Jace opened his mouth to reply then closed it and looked away from Magnus, knowing that he had no other solution.

Magnus took a deep breath and stood up straight and tall. “I’ll do what I have to, to bring Alexander back.”

“You can’t go alone,” Isabelle mentioned. “It’s too dangerous.”

“She’s right,” Jace agreed. “We could ask Raphael to spare a vampire, or maybe Meliorn could lend us a hand.”

“Um, hi,” Simon’s voice squeaked from behind Jace as he stepped out of the shadow. He cleared his throat before speaking again. “I could go.”

Jace’s response was immediate. “Absolutely not, Si. I’m not letting you go.”

Simon raised his eyebrows at Jace and pursed his lips. “You’re not _letting_ me go? Since when do you control me, Herondale?”

“You know what I mean,” Jace said exasperatedly. “Like Izzy said, it’s too dangerous. You can’t go.”

Simon rolled his eyes. “Alec is as much of a friend to me as he is to you. Magnus needs a buddy down there and I am the only other one here who has demon blood. I’m going. I want to go. I don’t care if you disapprove.”

“But Si–”

“No, Jace, I don’t care. I’m helping to bring Alec back. Plus, it’s not like I’m completely helpless. You’ve trained me up and I have vamp speed. I think I can manage just fine if a situation were to arise.”

Jace opened his mouth to argue but then settled on sighing in defeat, knowing that his soulmate wouldn’t budge once he made up his mind.

“I swear on Raziel that if you don’t come back, I’m going to go down there and kill you myself.”

Simon grinned and nodded. “I promise I’ll come back.”

“Simon,” Magnus called, putting his hand on the vampire’s shoulder. “Thank you.”

“There’s no need to thank family, Magnus,” Simon replied, giving Magnus a warm smile. “We’re all in this together.”

“I- I don’t know what to say.” Magnus looked at Simon, stunned by his declaration. He looked over at Jace who nodded at him with a smile. _Family_. That word had Magnus’ eyes stinging, just a little, but he held back the tears.

“I guess that settles it,” Isabelle concluded. “Magnus and Simon will go to Edom and bring Alec back. Or die.”

Simon rolled his eyes and clapped Magnus on the shoulder. “We’ll definitely bring him back.”

Everyone turned to look at Maryse expectantly. Maryse gazed out at the group for a long while before pursing her lips and nodding, not saying a word.

Magnus breathed a sigh of relief as Simon grinned beside him. “Thank you, Maryse.”

“Alright, let’s get you guys prepared for the mission of a lifetime,” Jace said, voice sounding almost excited.

Isabelle left the office first, then Jace with Simon trailing right behind him. As Magnus reached the door, a quiet voice called out to him.

“Magnus,” Maryse said, voice softer and more strained this time. Magnus was surprised to hear her say his name. He turned around to see the woman with her arms at her side, shoulders sagging. Her eyes were wet and vulnerable.

“Please,” she continued. “Please bring back my son.”

Magnus took in a deep breath and nodded. “I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	18. Up in Flames

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 18, here we go!
> 
> We're getting closer to the end of this, wowza lol again, idk how i feel about this chapter but I hope you enjoy it anyway :)
> 
> my brain is currently exploding from doing full-time uni for my masters degree where i have so many readings to do and so much writing and analysising and i have to write 3 major creative pieces and im also trying to write more fanfics and also work on a novel so please pray that the creative juices in my brain never stop flowing lol
> 
> once i finish posting this malec fic, i have 1 more malec fic i would love to share with you guys! it's a 20k oneshot with a bit of smut :)
> 
> anyways,
> 
> Happy reading!

Alec was looking out the glassless window in the corner again. He had nothing else better to do and for some reason, watching the occasional demon run across the barren land or get into a fight with another demon was entertaining. It was probably the best entertainment he was going to get in this place. Alec only had one other person to talk to and he wasn’t about to go and befriend a demon. The demon would more than likely try to kill Alec on instinct before they would ever sit down and listen to Alec whine about missing his family and Magnus. Alec wasn’t used to this. It wasn’t normal for him to have nothing to do. There was always another mission, another demon to hunt and kill. But with nothing to do in Edom, Alec was feeling out of touch with himself and it made him uncomfortable.

Spending time with Asmodeus didn’t make his time in Edom any easier.

Asmodeus enjoyed torturing Alec with finding his fears and etching them deep into Alec’s soul so that he could think about them for days on end. He didn’t know how much more of the demon’s laugh and mocking tone he could take. The way Asmodeus would be so condescending about his family and Magnus irritated Alec but he tried to not give into the demon’s taunts. He had tried multiple times to attack Asmodeus with the few arrows he had or his seraph blade, but his efforts were futile. The demon would just give him a pitiful look and laugh.

“Mr Lightwood,” Alec heard Asmodeus call, the demon’s voice immediately annoying him. “Do come away from the window. Seeing you stand there all the time is so dreadfully intolerable. Do you have nothing better to do?”

“Not necessarily, no,” Alec replied in a sarcastic tone. “You could let me kill you.”

Asmodeus let out a laugh and took a seat in his navy velvet armchair. “I’m quite alright. Thank you for the offer.”

“You have the next sixty years or so to change your mind. The offer is always there,” Alec jested with a fake smile.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Though, I don’t think I’ll be changing it any time soon.”

“You know, I never asked this, but why did you bring me here?” Alec asked, taking a seat on the golden chaise lounge. “What do I have to offer you?”

“Honestly, nothing,” Asmodeus replied nonchalantly. “I just revel in making people suffer. Also, taking you away from Magnus would give him more incentive to give me his immortality. I do love making my son squirm.”

“What do you need his immortality for?”

“Nothing for you to worry about. Demon politics.”

Alec raised an eyebrow, intrigued by the notion of ‘demon politics’ but he chose not to pry. “Magnus would never give up his immortality. He definitely wouldn’t do it for me.”

“You’d be surprised,” Asmodeus said with a grin. “Soulmate connections make people do interesting things. Why, you’re the shining example of that.”

“Magnus still won’t do it.”

“I’ll be glad to prove you wrong,” Asmodeus replied, his grin growing wider. Alec tilted his head, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. “We seem to have some guests,” the demon announced.

That was when Alec heard it, immediately jumping to his feet and whipping around. His name was being called out by a voice he would recognise anywhere. It was a voice that he had heard begging for him, joking with him, flirting with him, soothing him. There was no way he was here. It was impossible.

“Alexander,” he heard again in the distance but louder this time, like it was getting closer.

Alec shook his head. He had to be imagining it.

“Alexander,” the voice called again, even louder this time, like it was just behind a wall.

Alec’s feet were stuck to the floor. He wanted to run to the voice, to check for himself whether it was real. But a part of him denied it, believing that it was Asmodeus playing tricks on him to torment him further. Alec’s saliva was stuck in his throat as the anticipation of the voice getting closer was internally killing him. He didn’t like how he couldn’t control the sense of hope building inside him because he didn’t want to hope. He didn’t want to be ultimately disappointed and distraught when he would discover that it was all fake.

“Alexander,” the voice called again, so much closer this time, and Alec sucked in a sharp breath, closing his eyes.

Alec waited.

It may have been a few seconds, but it certainly felt like forever.

It was not until Alec heard his name again, like as if the voice was in the room, that he opened his eyes to see Magnus rushing into the keep, looking a little haphazard and dishevelled but still handsome all the same.

“Magnus,” Alec breathed out, releasing the breath he had been holding before collapsing to the floor. Familiar arms were immediately around him, hands shaking as they held him close. “Magnus,” he said again, looking at the face before him like he couldn’t believe it was real.

“I’ve got you, darling. I’ve got you,” Magnus whispered, brushing Alec’s hair out of his eyes.

“Magnus,” Alec repeated just as breathlessly as before.

“I’m here, Alexander,” Magnus reassured, smiling down at him so sweetly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Magnus,” Alec sobbed, wrapping his arms around the warlock and holding onto him like his life depended on it.

The need to feel Magnus physically, to confirm that the person before him was real and not a figment of his imagination, was so intense. He let out a soft sob against Magnus’ shoulder as the familiar scent of sandalwood that he had come to love invaded his lungs and settled warmly inside him. Alec wanted nothing more than to live in that scent forever, to be surrounded by it like it was his life force. The waves of shock and relief were crashing together inside of him, making Alec lightheaded.

“As touching as this is,” Asmodeus commented, breaking Alec and Magnus out of their reunion, “I can’t say I’m too surprised to see you here, son.”

Magnus sent a glare to Asmodeus as he helped Alec stand up, making sure his soulmate was stable on his own two feet before letting him go.

“We’re here for Alec.”

“We?” Alec asked softly.

“Magnus!” You can’t just run off –” Simon came running into the keep, stuttering in his footsteps when he saw the situation in front of him. “Oh, right. Hey, Alec, we’re here to save you!”

Alec’s eyes darted between Simon and Magnus, arching his eyebrows. Magnus could only shrug in response.

“You must be Asmodeus,” Simon said, marching up to the demon and holding out his hand, which seemingly amused Asmodeus. “I’m–”

“Simon,” Magnus hissed. “This is not the time or place.”

Simon’s head snapped in Magnus’ direction, his mouth open to speak an apology, but once he saw Magnus’ glare, he decided against it. He quickly pulled his hand away from the demon and flitted to Magnus’ side, muttering a quick ‘sorry’.

“Now that that’s been established,” Asmodeus started, “what can I do for you, Magnus?”

“Give Alec back,” Magnus demanded.

“If you want him, you can take him.” Simon smiled almost immediately. “But, of course, there is a price.” Simon’s smile instantly fell.

“What do you want?” Magnus asked.

“Your immortality,” Asmodeus replied, an evil smile plastered on his face.

Magnus took a deep breath and gritted his teeth, nodding. “Fine.”

Asmodeus looked over at Alec, his smile grating Alec’s nerves. “Ah, Mr Lightwood, I seem to have proven you wrong.”

Alec scowled at Asmodeus and turned to face Magnus. “Magnus, no,” Alec protested. “I’m not letting you do that.”

“If it’s to save your life, Alexander, I will do what I have to.”

Alec shook his head. “I’m not worth it. Don’t do this.”

Magnus’ eyes turned soft, his hand finding its familiar spot against Alec’s cheek. “You’re always worth it, darling.”

Alec held onto Magnus’ hand against his cheek, turning his head to place a soft kiss on the warlock’s palm. “I’m still not letting you give up your immortality for me.”

“You are all starting to bore me,” Asmodeus interrupted, his jaw resting against his hand as his elbow leaned on the armrest of his chair, looking utterly disinterested. “I require you to make a decision, son. Either you give me your immortality, or I keep Alec. _Or_ I go and destroy your precious Earth.”

Both Alec and Magnus spoke at the same time.

“I’m staying.”

“I’ll give it to you.”

Asmodeus had his finger against his temple, looking between the couple and feeling somewhat irritated. “I’m so disappointed. Love has made you weak, son.”

Simon clearing his throat had everyone’s attention instantly on him. Magnus was glaring at him again. Alec creased his eyebrows in confusion, and Asmodeus was looking at him with intrigue. Simon’s eyes darted between the three people before he took a step forward with an awkward smile.

“Um, hi,” he started with a small wave. “You’ve technically already met me but I’m Simon Lewis. I’m still new to all this but, um, if it helps, you can take my immortality.”

“Simon, you don’t have to–” Simon put up his hand to get Magnus to stop talking and shook his head.

“I want to do this.”

“And who are you, Mr Lewis to offer up your immortality like this?” Asmodeus asked, standing up and sauntering over to Simon.

“I’m a vampire,” Simon answered, showing off his fangs.

“Yes, I judged as much. But what about _you_ ,” Asmodeus stressed as he gestured to Simon up and down, his lips pursing in disappointment, “is special?”

“Oh, right.” Simon let out an awkward laugh. “I’m a Daylighter.”

Asmodeus arched his eyebrows and smiled, seemingly impressed. “My, my, a Daylighter, here, in my home. I certainly wasn’t expecting this. You _have_ been keeping good company, son.”

“Simon, you don’t have to do this,” Alec said, frowning at the vampire.

Simon gave Alec a reassuring smile. “Alec, you know as well as I do that I’m a terrible vampire. I never chose this and I’ve never enjoyed it, just tolerated it because it became my life. If I had the chance to be mortal again, I would take it. Plus, being able to grow old with Jace would be really nice.”

“But Si–”

“I’m sure about this, Alec. It’s okay.” Simon looked at Asmodeus again and dropped his smile. He squared his shoulders and straightened up. “If you want my immortality and my ability to be a Daylighter, I will happily give it to you. However, there are conditions.”

“As expected,” Asmodeus replied as he eyed Simon with interest, rolling his hand as a way to tell Simon to continue. “Pray tell me, what are these conditions?”

“First, you return Alec.”

“That’s a given.”

“Second, you leave Magnus alone.”

Asmodeus hummed disapprovingly.

“Third, you leave Earth alone.”

“How boring.”

“And finally, you return us to the New York Institute, unharmed.”

“That’s all?”

Simon took a quick glance at Magnus and Alec then at himself before lifting his head and looking back at Asmodeus. He gave the demon one nod. “All you will be taking from me is my immortality and my ability to be a Daylighter, nothing else. I will be human when we return to Earth. Do we have a deal?”

“You certainly know how to bargain, Mr Lewis.” Simon took that as a compliment and smiled proudly. “I will gladly take you up on your offer and meet your demands.”

“Wait,” Simon said, surprised, his eyes widening. “Really?”

Asmodeus sighed in irritation and shook his head. “My boy, have a little more confidence in yourself.”

“Wow, I didn’t think it would be that easy.” A wide grin grew on Simon’s face.

Asmodeus rolled his eyes. “Shall we, as you humans say, shake on it?”

“Oh, yes, of course!” Simon grabbed Asmodeus’ hand and shook it energetically.

Asmodeus pulled his hand away with a sound of disgust, taking a step back from Simon. “I hope you enjoy being mortal, Mr Lewis.”

“I’ve done it before so I’m good to go,” Simon mentioned casually with a thumbs-up.

Asmodeus turned to face Magnus, giving him a look of mock sadness. “My dear son, I’m going to miss you.”

Magnus scoffed. “I won’t miss you, Father.”

Asmodeus clutched at his chest dramatically. “Don’t break a father’s heart, son.”

“Like you have a heart,” Magnus muttered, scowling at his father.

Asmodeus took a step over to Alec, taking the Shadowhunter’s hands into his own. “Dearest Alexander, I’m going to miss your company and our long, meaningful talks.”

Alec grimaced and pulled his hands away from Asmodeus, instantly finding Magnus’ hand at his side and intertwining their fingers. “I’m sure you’ll be fine without me.”

“Au contraire. Tormenting you was the highlight of my days.”

Alec clenched his jaw and looked away from Asmodeus, his free hand forming into a fist. He would have punched Asmodeus if he were sure the demon wouldn’t kill him first.

Asmodeus turned around and waltzed back to his velvet armchair, settling into it and crossing his legs.

“Well then, time I send you all home. I wish you all the best. And Alexander, remember, you don’t have forever.”

Alec automatically tensed and took a quick glance at Magnus, who was looking confused at his father’s statement, before nodding hesitantly. Asmodeus smiled at that and with a click of his fingers, darkness engulfed Alec, Magnus and Simon.

The last thing Alec saw was Asmodeus grinning wickedly, his sharp teeth gleaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	19. Carry You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 19, here we go!
> 
> This is basically a filler chapter and purely self-indulgent because this chapter is really all I want for Magnus and Alec lol it's really all just fluff and cute stuff cause these two need a break. I hope you like it!
> 
> Happy reading!

Magnus’ eyes fluttered open as a sliver of sunlight made its way through a small opening in his curtains, settling onto the sleeping man beside him. The warlock let out a soft sigh of relief, as he did the past few days, finding comfort in seeing Alec next to him looking so innocent and at peace. Magnus reached a hand up to brush a few stray hairs out of Alec’s face before slowly running his fingers back through Alec’s hair. Alec shifted at the soft touch, his lips parting slightly in a way that Magnus could only describe as adorable. The warlock smiled to himself and threw his arm across Alec’s waist, pulling the Shadowhunter in closer. He took solace in feeling Alec’s skin against his, running his fingers up and down Alec’s rune-covered arm. Magnus unconsciously let blue sparks out of his fingers against Alec’s arm, causing the Shadowhunter to groan.

“Magnus,” Alec croaked, eyes shut tight.

“Sorry, darling,” Magnus whispered, kissing Alec’s forehead and laying his hand down flat on Alec’s arm. “Accident. Go back to sleep.”

Alec hummed and immediately fell back to sleep, tension easing out of his face, his lips opening up again.

The Shadowhunter was beautiful. His plump lips and cheeks had a light dusting of pink contrasting against his lightly tan skin. His never-styled hair was tousled to one side due to spending most of his night sleeping on his side. Once in a while, his nose would scrunch, most likely in response to what he was dreaming about, then his face would relax and he would let out a soft sigh. Magnus ran his thumb over Alec’s cheek, fondness settling inside his chest at studying Alec’s slightly puffy face. Alec didn’t look like he had been to Hell and back. He looked like he should have been a young student in college trying to catch up on sleep after spending all night working on a paper. Seeing Alec asleep beside him helped to melt away all the stress from the past couple of weeks and Magnus felt like he could breathe again.

The past few days had been busy with their return to Earth. People were shocked and relieved to see them standing in the Institute after Asmodeus let them go. People were more than surprised to see Alec was just fine without a single scratch on him.

Isabelle had barrelled into them as soon as she was notified of their return, crying and holding onto her brother, reprimanding him for making such a stupid decision, not letting go until Clary came to pull her away.

Jace was never one to show his emotions so explicitly but Magnus could see the slight twitch in his face and the way the tension bled out of his body as soon as he saw his parabatai. He had looked at Magnus and gave a single nod before hugging Alec tightly and thumping him on the back. When they got a chance to have a private conversation, Alec explained to Jace about what Simon did for him and Magnus as he let out a sob of relief and guilt. Jace shook his head and reassured Alec that if Simon was happy then he was happy. There was no one to blame.

Magnus knew that the Clave would not let everything go so easily after Alec had sacrificed himself for the greater good of mankind. He was deemed a hero but that didn’t mean he was seen as innocent either. The Inquisitor spent the majority of her days interrogating Magnus, Alec and Simon, bombarding them with questions, just the same questions over and over again. Through the use of the Soul Sword, they answered all her questions truthfully, but it seemed like she wanted more information, information that none of them had. Eventually, by the end of the week, the Inquisitor ended her interrogation and returned to Idris. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

Now that Magnus finally had a chance to relax and spend time with Alec, he felt so fortunate with the way things had turned out. After everything they had gone through, just having Alec in his bed was a blessing in itself, and nothing could ruin a perfect moment such as this.

Except for maybe his stomach.

Magnus’ stomach made a gurgling sound and he let out a frustrated sigh. He hadn’t eaten since their early dinner last night and, taking a quick look at the clock on his bedside table, it was well past noon. Magnus turned flat on his back, looking up at the ceiling and trying to decide between getting out of bed or staying in bed to cuddle with his soulmate. It was honestly an easy decision, and just as Magnus turned back to face Alec, his stomach gurgled again. Magnus let out another sigh and flipped open his blanket, sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed. He ran a hand over his face before letting it settle on his unpleased stomach.

“Yes, yes, food, I know,” Magnus said as his stomach, seemingly satisfied with his statement, stopped making noises.

Just as Magnus pushed himself to his feet, a strong arm wrapped around his waist and pulled him back down onto the bed. Magnus chuckled and spun around, his hand naturally finding its way into Alec’s hair. Alec was sprawled across his bed, his face scrunching with his eyes still closed.

“Stay,” Alec rasped, a small pout on his lips.

Magnus leaned down, his lips brushing against Alec’s temple. “Alexander, we need breakfast. Well, actually, lunch. Brunch.”

“Can’t you magic something?” Alec grumbled, opening one eye to look up at Magnus, immediately closing it when he decided that even the tiny amount of sunlight coming through the curtains was too much. A sleepy Alec was simply too endearing.

“Yes, but I don’t like crumbs in my bed.”

“Magnus,” Alec whined, which had the warlock almost caving.

“I wish Jace could see you now,” Magnus teased.

Alec instantly opened his eyes and sent a pouting glare to Magnus which only had the warlock laughing.

“Alright, come on. Time to get out of bed. It’s been long overdue, but we can go on our first date,” Magnus coaxed, arching his eyebrows in suggestion.

Alec’s eyes seemed to brighten at the notion and he sat up slowly, keeping his arm around Magnus’ waist and pulling himself against the warlock’s back. “A lunch date?” he asked, his voice soft yet eager, placing a kiss on the back of Magnus’ neck.

Magnus leaned back against Alec and hummed. “We’ll go anywhere you like.”

Alec hooked his chin over Magnus’ shoulder, nodding and trying to blink the sleep out of his eyes. Magnus had never seen Alec so… _soft_ , so different from how he was when he was on duty. It warmed Magnus’ heart to know that he was the only one who saw Alec like this, that he was the only one who knew Alec like this.

Magnus patted Alec’s head before pulling himself out of Alec’s hold, albeit a little begrudgingly. He would have stayed in bed all day with Alec if he could, but he wasn’t going to waste the few days off Alec had. Magnus stretched his arms above his head as he made a satisfied noise. He could feel Alec’s gaze on his shirtless torso as he turned around to look at his soulmate.

“See something you like?” Magnus asked, a smug smile playing on his lips.

Alec’s eyes flickered up to look at Magnus’, his cheeks blushing more than he would have liked them to be. He opened his mouth to deny whatever Magnus was thinking but all thought of denial flew out the window the moment Magnus leaned down and pressed his lips against Alec’s. Alec made a strangled noise in the back of his throat before relaxing and settling into the kiss, his fingers finding their way into Magnus’ hair. Their lips moved slowly and sensually against each other as Magnus licked his way in Alec’s mouth, moaning contently. By the Angel, Alec had missed this. Since they had returned, they had only been able to share chaste kisses when they had the chance. But now, it was just the two of them, alone, and if Alec couldn’t spend the day sleeping, he certainly could spend it kissing Magnus.

Alec’s hold around Magnus tightened as he slowly laid back down on the bed, pulling Magnus down on top of him, his lips moving more eager against Magnus’. Magnus braced himself on his elbows on either side of Alec’s head, sucking on Alec’s tongue and pushing his own back into Alec’s mouth. He grinned into the kiss when he heard Alec let out an involuntary moan as his tongue slid against Alec’s. Magnus pressed further into Alec as Alec’s legs automatically spread when Magnus’ knee found its place between them. Magnus had kissed plenty of people in his long life but kissing Alec was nothing like anything he had ever felt before. It wasn’t only that he wanted to kiss Alec. He _needed_ to kiss Alec. Magnus needed to feel Alec against him, to feel him as close as possible, like he needed Alec to function, to breathe. Alec was like his life source and if living meant he could kiss Alec for the rest of his life, he wasn’t going to deny himself that. Nothing could ruin this for Magnus.

Except for maybe his stomach. Again.

Magnus’ stomach gurgled and he pulled away hesitantly from Alec’s lips, loving how red they were and how they shined, covered in spit. Alec whined and tried to pull Magnus back, but Magnus pulled himself away even further, standing up straight and looking down at Alec. Magnus felt his breath get caught in his throat. God, Alec looked so perfect like this, laying splayed out on Magnus’ gold silky sheets, a little dishevelled and kind of debauched. Alec’s rune-covered torso was on full display for Magnus to admire, the muscles moving under Alec’s skin in a way that sent shivers down Magnus’ spine. Magnus had to fight back the temptation to crawl back over Alec and have his way with him when Alec looked at him with _want_ in his eyes, biting his bottom lip. Magnus groaned inwardly and ran a hand over his face.

“Don’t do this to me, Alexander,” Magnus said, voice a little strangled.

Alec tilted his head to the side and gave Magnus an innocent look. “What do you mean?”

“You don’t know what you do to me,” Magnus mumbled, his eyes slowly raking up and down Alec’s body.

Alec sat up on the bed, his arms going around Magnus’ waist, pulling the warlock close to him. He looked up at Magnus with a smirk. “I do know.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow at Alec. “By the Angel, Mr Lightwood, I didn’t know you could be like this.”

“Like what?” Alec asked, a small crease forming between his eyebrows.

“Flirty.”

Alec scoffed. “Well, I’m full of surprises.”

Magnus hummed. “You never cease to amaze me, Alexander.” He leaned down, cupping Alec’s face in his hands and kissing Alec all over again.

That was until his stomach gurgled one more time, clearly desperate for sustenance.

Alec groaned and pulled away from Magnus, flopping down onto the bed.

“Fine, we’ll go eat,” he complained.

Magnus chuckled and shook his head in amusement. “Don’t be disappointed, darling. We can always continue this later. Besides, if we eat, we’ll have more energy.”

Alec’s face grew red as he grabbed the closest pillow and threw it in Magnus’ general direction, completely missing him. Magnus just laughed.

“Just go get ready,” Alec grumbled.

“It will take a second to prepare myself. You need to get dressed and brush your teeth. Morning breath isn’t attractive on anyone.”

“You weren’t complaining a second ago.”

“Only because I really wanted to kiss you. It overtook my general thinking capacity.”

Alec sat up and looked at Magnus, tapping his lips with his finger. “Kiss me again?”

This time, Alec’s stomach was the one to make a noise and Magnus snorted. “No, we’re going to get some food. Come on.”

Alec huffed and groaned before standing up. He lifted his arms above his head and stretched, relishing in the way all the tension left his body. He noticed the very obvious way Magnus was staring at him and he smiled smugly.

“See something you like, Magnus?” Alec emulated, hands going on his hips.

Magnus blinked and shook his head slightly to clear it before looking back up at Alec’s face. “You have no idea.”

Alec hummed and shrugged. “I can guess.”

“When we get back, we are definitely continuing what we were doing.”

“Eager, aren’t you, Mr Bane?”

Magnus smirked and ran his eyes up and down Alec again. “For you, Mr Lightwood? Always.”

The stars were shining brightly alongside a full moon, not a cloud in the sky to block out their light. It was strange to see the sun in New York and then a few seconds later to be admiring the night sky in Barcelona, but Alec loved it all the same. He had never been to Spain before and Alec couldn’t deny that it was certainly a romantic destination with its old cobblestone streets and gothic architecture. The city was bustling and everywhere he turned music could be heard, soft, melodious voices filling the night in all directions. They hadn’t walked around the city for very long, but Alec was amazed by what he saw, eyes roaming all over the city, mentally taking photographic images to remember how beautiful the city was. It was all kind of… magical.

Magnus dragged Alec down a street, grabbing them a table at a small restaurant on a nondescript corner, promising Alec that it would be the best meal he’d ever have. It was a little confusing to him to be having dinner for lunch, but Alec went with it, knowing that this was what life with Magnus would be like. A life full of surprises and things never making sense but in their own magical way, they felt right. Kind of like who Magnus was.

Alec had told Magnus once before and he meant it: Magnus was an enigma. Alec had never encountered someone like Magnus before. The warlock was eccentric and exuded confidence, always standing out in a crowd, never ashamed to be who he was. He would always speak what he was thinking, never afraid to hurt someone if it was necessary to help them. Magnus was kind, generous, beautiful, always lighting up every room he walked into. Magnus forced Alec to reconsider how he was living his life and who he was living for. For once in his life, Alec learned to be selfish, learned to put himself first. He didn’t realise how unhealthy it was for him to be living the way he was, but Magnus came into his life and changed everything. Alec was sure that Magnus was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

“What are you thinking about in that pretty little head of yours?” Magnus asked, startling Alec out of his thoughts.

Alec smiled and shook his head. “Nothing.”

Magnus arched an eyebrow. “Nothing?”

“Just… you.”

“Me?”

“Yeah. I was thinking about you.”

“All good things, I hope.”

Alec chuckled. “Only the very best.”

Magnus made a noise of interest and leaned his elbows on the table, his hands cradling his face. “Pray tell me, my dear.”

“I was just thinking about…” Alec started as he picked at the uneaten food on his plate with his fork, a slight blush on his cheeks. “… how perfect you are.”

Magnus’ mouth opened slightly in surprise, his eyes blinking, not expecting to hear something like that come out of Alec.

“You’re just so amazing,” Alec continued. “And I’m so… plain. I don’t know why we were paired together.”

Magnus frowned, taking Alec’s left hand into one of his own, running his thumb over Alec’s knuckles.

“Hey, Alexander,” he said softly. “You’re the furthest thing from plain. You are strong, courageous, and fiercely loyal. You allow me to truly be myself without a single ounce of judgement. Sometimes when I look at you, I can’t believe that someone so beautiful and compassionate could be mine. I’ve lived for over four centuries and I can say, without a doubt in my mind, that you are the best thing to have ever happened to me.”

Alec’s eyes widened, surprised at how Magnus’ words emulated his own thoughts. He gulped and opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to find the right words to say.

“I… I…”

“It’s okay,” Magnus assured, squeezing Alec’s hand with an affectionate smile. “I know.”

Alec hadn’t the faintest idea what Magnus was referring to, but Alec didn’t care, not with the way Magnus was looking at him like he was the only one who mattered, like Magnus loved him. It had Alec’s heart soaring in the night sky of Barcelona. Alec was breathless, his heart hammering against his ribcage. Magnus just kept staring at Alec with so much love and affection, his thumb caressing Alec’s hand, and Alec was finding it harder and harder to breathe, his heartbeat drumming loudly in his ears. Magnus had barely done anything, and Alec was so easily affected by him. He wanted to spend every single day he had with Magnus, every second to be in Magnus’ arms, making Magnus smile and laugh. He wanted to spend every waking moment making Magnus happy.

“Alexander, don’t think so hard,” Magnus joked. “I don’t expect some grand declaration of love from you, or something like that. I can tell how much you care about me and I know you feel what I feel. That’s all that really matters to me right now.”

“Magnus,” Alec breathed out, letting go of that breath he had been holding. “Thank you.”

“For what, darling?”

“For being so understanding of me. I know I haven’t been the easiest person since the beginning, but I am grateful you have stuck by me. And I hope, um…” Alec hesitated for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck, looking down at his plate of food. “…you’ll continue to stay by me in the future.”

Magnus faltered for a second before settling into an amused smile. “Why, Mr Lightwood, are you proposing to me?”

Alec’s eyes immediately widened, looking at Magnus in alarm. “By the Angel, no. That’s no– No, Magnus– I was just– I–” he stuttered.

Magnus laughed and squeezed Alec’s hand. “Calm down, Alexander. I’m joking. I know that’s not what you meant, but I am glad you see me in your future, though.”

Alec visibly relaxed, taking a deep breath before glaring at Magnus without an ounce of anger in his eyes. “You have got to stop teasing me like that. It’s not nice to do that to your boyfriend.”

Magnus sat up straight and blinked his eyes, his face an unreadable expression.

“What?” Alec asked, a slight crease developing in between his eyebrows. “Did I say something wrong?”

Magnus shook his head to clear it. “You’ve never called me that before.”

“What?” Alec thought about it for a second. “Boyfriend?

Magnus nodded.

“Oh. I just kind of assumed. I know we haven’t necessarily discussed it, but I like to think that’s what you are. I mean, I wouldn’t kiss someone who wasn’t my boyfriend. It’s okay, though… right?”

Magnus let out a small laugh of relief before smiling widely at Alec. “Alexander, of course, it’s okay. I would be more concerned if you just considered me as a ‘special’ friend.”

“Oh, good,” Alec said, returning Magnus’ smile.

“There’s something I want to say. It may scare you, but I know you won’t run away.”

Alec tilted his head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Alexander,” Magnus starts, his gaze focusing on Alec’s. “You may not be proposing to me tonight but one of these days, I’ll propose to you. I do plan on marrying you.”

It took a moment for the statement to register in Alec’s head before he started spluttering, utterly unsure of how to even respond to a declaration like that. Alec was sure that Magnus wasn’t joking, and the revelation had the wheels in Alec’s head turning, his heart racing all over again in his chest.

“Just thought I should let you know,” Magnus mentioned nonchalantly.

Alec cleared his throat, taking a moment to try to calm the warmth in his cheeks. “Shouldn’t you ask my parents for my hand in marriage or something like that?”

Magnus waved a dismissive hand at Alec. “I’m not one for tradition. Also, judging by how much your mother likes me, I can only assume their answer will be a firm ‘no’. I’ll just marry you first and get their approval later. As long as you like me, that’s all that matters.”

“I know the last time I said this, it wasn’t during the best circumstances, but I do like you, you know?” Alec asked, looking up through his lashes.

“I know,” Magnus replied, smiling so tenderly at Alec. “If it wasn’t obvious, I like you too.”

“I know.” Alec emulated, a wide smile growing on his face.

Magnus lifted Alec’s left hand and placed a kiss on his fourth knuckle, as if he was making a silent promise for the future. The act was so simple, but it sent Alec’s heart into a flutter.

“What do you say we get out of here?” Magnus asked softly.

Alec nodded. “I’ll go wherever you go,” he promised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


	20. Skin and Bones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 20, here we go!
> 
> I actually almost forgot to post this chapter today lol we're so close to the end! it's the home stretch!
> 
> idk how I feel about this chapter but a little bit of Simon and Alec bonding which I think is nice :)
> 
> Happy reading!

It was late and the Institute was quiet with people out on missions or relaxing for the weekend. Alec made his way down the hallway towards his parents’ office. He had received a message that his mother wanted to speak to him and he hoped it was good news from the Clave saying that he had finally been cleared for missions.

After everything that happened in Edom, and despite people deeming Alec a hero for what he did, the Clave were not forgiving of Alec going against orders and sacrificing himself. It didn’t matter how right or wrong something was, going against the Clave was going against the Law itself. Sed Lex, Dura Lex. The Law is Hard but it is the Law. The Clave were neither kind nor merciful, and so Alec had been taken off of missions and routine patrols until they decided he didn’t have to be anymore.

It made Alec irritated and antsy, similar to when he was in Edom with Asmodeus. Being a Shadowhunter was everything to Alec, it was something he held a lot of pride in. Not doing his duty as a Shadowhunter by not going on a simple routine patrol had Alec feeling out of place, in the Institute and with himself. Whenever Jace was free, which was rare, he would spend time with Alec, telling him about his missions, which certainly didn’t help Alec feel better about his situation. He should have been the one taking down a rogue werewolf with Jace, not Raj. Being assigned to train Simon helped to keep him active and take his mind off of how uncomfortable he was, but it didn’t help to eliminate his need to go out and protect the city.

Alec wanted nothing more than to be back on the job.

Alec was about to knock on the door to his parents’ office when he heard familiar voices behind the door speaking in hushed tones.

“… grateful for what you did,” Alec heard his mother say and listened in closer to hear who she was talking to.

“Maryse, I did what anyone would have done.” Alec would have noticed Magnus’ voice anywhere. “It was more Simon than it was me.”

“Magnus.” His mother had said the name without an ounce of hatred. “You brought my son back to me when I thought he was gone for good.”

“I would do anything for Alexander.”

“I know I’ve had my prejudices and there’s still a lot I need to learn but thank you for standing by my son. It’s what any mother wants for her children.”

Alec couldn’t help the smile growing on his face. Magnus was never his mother’s favourite person and Alec hated being the middleman between them. After breaking his engagement off with Lydia, his mother had hardly spoken to him and it was hard for Alec to deal with a broken relationship with his mother. Despite her faults, he loved her deeply and only ever wanted for her and Magnus to get along – or at least to tolerate each other. He could have never expected this and it had a warm feeling spreading through his chest.

There was a moment of silence and Alec figured it was a good time as any to enter the office. He slowly pushed open the door and was shocked to see Magnus and his mother in an embrace.

“Oh, Alec!” Maryse said as she let go of Magnus, turning away from Alec to wipe away the tears from her eyes.

“Hello, darling,” Magnus greeted, striding over to Alec and pecking his lips.

“Hey,” Alec replied softly, smiling widely at his soulmate before looking at his mother. “Hello, Mother.”

“It’s good to see you, Alec,” Maryse said with a genuine smile. “It’s been a while.”

“I’ve missed you, Mum.”

“I’ve missed you too, son.” Maryse stepped forward and placed a soft kiss on Alec’s cheek.

“What did you need me for?”

“Ah, yes, give me a moment.” Maryse walked to her desk and settling into her office chair, her hands going to the document right in front of her. “The Clave has decided that you are allowed to go back to doing routine patrols. No missions, yet. I’m sorry.”

Alec breathed a sigh of relief and shook his head. “It’s better than nothing. I’m happy to take it. I’ve been spending too much time doing nothing.”

“Spending time with me is doing nothing?” Magnus asked, mockingly offended.

Alec snorted. “You know that’s not what I mean. I just want to get back to work.”

“How is Simon doing?” Maryse asked, leaning her elbows on the desk and interlocking her fingers under her chin.

“He’s… getting there, but it will take some time till he’s ready for Ascension. Wouldn’t it be better to send him to the Shadowhunter Academy in Idris?”

Maryse thinned her lips and hummed. “I did suggest this, but your brother refused to let him go and he convinced his dear grandmother that it would be better for Simon to stay here.”

Alec nodded. Of course, Jace wouldn’t let Simon out of his sight, especially for two years.

“Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help. My services are always available,” Magnus offered. “I do owe him my life, after all.”

Maryse smiled and shook her head. “Magnus, you’ve done more than enough. I can’t ask for more.”

“Maryse, we’re all family and I would be more than delighted to help poor Simon out.”

Alec saw his mother visibly tense just slightly at the statement and it set something off in him that he didn’t understand. He almost stepped forward to say something but was held back by Magnus holding onto his hand, shaking his head at him.

Maryse cleared her throat and got out of her seat, stepping around her desk and walking up to Magnus. She straightened out the lines in her dress before looking up at Magnus and taking his free hand into hers.

“Thank you for the offer. If Alec needs a hand with anything, I’m sure he would be happy to come to you,” Maryse said, taking in a deep breath and giving Magnus a sincere smile. “I’m glad to welcome you to the family, Magnus.”

“Mum…” Alec whispered, his eyes darting between his mother and Magnus and the way they were holding hands.

Maryse took a quick look at her son and he could see the pride in her eyes before her gaze fell back onto Magnus.

“I know I haven’t been the easiest woman and I resented you since the beginning. I’m trying to change. I can see how happy you make Alec and I hope you’ll continue to do so in the future.”

Magnus squeezed Maryse’s hand and smiled warmly at her. “I intend to.”

Alec stood there in stunned silence, watching his mother and Magnus have a touching moment of acceptance and forgiveness. It was amazing to see his mother put down her walls and take off her leader façade for once and Alec was grateful to be in the presence of such an iconic moment for him. He knew that it would take time for his mother to get used to the idea of Magnus and for their relationship to be perfect, but this was the first step in the right direction. And honestly, this was all Alec needed.

Maryse let go of Magnus’ hand and turned to face her son.

“Alec, I am sorry for putting so much pressure on you and for forcing you to do things you didn’t want. It makes me a terrible mother and –”

“No, Mum, you’re not terrible –”

Maryse shook her head. “It wasn’t right of me to do what I did and I’m sorry. I’m so proud of who you have become and I know that you’re going to be an amazing Consul one day.”

Alec took in a deep breath and threw his arms around his mother, holding her tight against his chest. “I love you, Mum.”

“I love you too, Alec,” Maryse replied with a sniffle, before pulling back from Alec with a proud smile and cupping his cheek. “I will always be proud of you, my son.”

“Thank you,” Alec said, the corners of his eyes stinging just a little.

“When your father comes back into town, let’s have a family dinner,” Maryse suggested, taking a step back from Alec. “I would love for Magnus to join us.”

“Maryse, you don’t have to –” Magnus tried to refuse.

“I insist,” Maryse interrupted, looking at Magnus like she meant business but with no malice in her eyes. “You’re family now so you have to put up with all of us at the same time.”

Magnus looked at Alec, who just shrugged at him, then back at Maryse and nodded. “I would love to join your family dinner. I’m sure I can handle a few Lightwoods and their soulmates.”

Maryse laughed and Alec snickered. “You haven’t seen a Lightwood family dinner. We do get a bit… competitive,” Maryse warned.

“Competitive?” Magnus asked, furrow his eyebrows in confusion.

“Don’t worry. You’ll have fun, I promise,” Alec assured.

“I’m trusting you, Alexander,” Magnus said, looking at Alec with suspicion.

Alec laughed and kissed Magnus’ cheek. “I promise.”

Maryse looked between her son and Magnus and smiled to herself, happy to see Alec smiling like he never had before.

Simon came charging at him with a long wooden staff and Alec had to hold back a laugh, his lips curling, at how ridiculous Simon looked before swiping his own staff at Simon’s feet, making the mundane land flat on his back with a loud groan.

“That’s not fair,” Simon complained, his pants coming in heavy as he stared up at the ceiling. “You’ve been doing this for so much longer than I have.”

Alec laughed as he stood over Simon, looking down at him with an amused smile. “Practice makes better, Simon. I thought you trained with Jace when you were still a vampire.”

Simon sat up, his legs sprawled out in front of him, sighing exasperatedly. “Well, it wasn’t so much as training as it was making out on this mat.”

Alec’s eyes darted down to the training mat he was standing on then back up at Simon before giving him a look of disgust and taking a step back.

“Oh my god, no, it wasn’t like that. I promise, we didn’t have sex in here. He tried to train me, but sometimes we got distracted. Also, back then I had vamp speed and superstrength which certainly helped.”

“Well, I’m training you now, and you will be ready to Ascend in no time,” Alec said, holding out a hand for Simon to take.

“I don’t have Angel blood like you guys,” Simon griped, grabbing onto Alec’s hand and standing up, dusting himself off.

Alec rolled his eyes. “If you can beat me without Angel blood, imagine what you can do when you Ascend.”

As a thank you to Simon’s ‘sacrifice’, Simon was gifted by the Clave the opportunity to Ascend and join the ranks of the Shadowhunters. Simon accepted almost immediately, asking for Jace to be his trainer. The Inquisitor had taken one look at Simon and shook her head, explaining that her grandson would be too much of a distraction to Simon who seemed to look like he would need _a lot_ of training.

Alec was assigned to be Simon’s trainer and teacher in Shadowhunter law and history. Simon never had the closest relationship with Alec. Jace often encouraged Simon to speak more to Alec but he was intimidated by the Shadowhunter. Maybe it was how tall he was, or how authoritative he could be or how if Simon gave Alec one wrong look, he would find an arrow going straight through his chest. Either way Simon never approached Alec much and Alec didn’t approach him.

Despite how Simon felt about Alec, he found that Alec was a relatively decent trainer, but also harsh at the same time. He taught Simon how to better his stances, how to improve his strength, what exercises to do to build his muscles, how to cool down after each session, and how to take care of himself on his days off. Alec was great. However, sometimes Alec would push Simon further than he would have liked. Simon knew the push was needed but it didn’t mean he had to like it. Each training session ended with Simon worn out and bruised, without having an iratze rune to use to heal himself.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Simon said dismissively. “I’ve just never been the fittest guy. You guys have been training since you were kids. I’ve been sitting on my ass and eating Cheetos.”

Alec laughed and shook his head. “We can go study up on Shadowhunter law in the library if you would rather do that.”

Simon thought about it for a second then scrunched his face. “Nope, I’m good. This is much more interesting than staring at The Shadowhunter’s Codex.”

“You’ve got this, Simon, trust me. You are doing a lot better than you think you are. I’m surprised a mundane, such as yourself, can even keep up with me.”

“I want Jace,” Simon mumbled, pouting.

“When we’re finished here, I promise you can go see him. My parabatai is not happy about our situation. He’s really forcing his… dissatisfaction through the bond. Come on, let’s do this again.”

Alec watched as Simon sighed before taking a deep breath and getting into an attack-ready stance. Alec circled around him, using his wooden staff to push parts of Simon’s body into their correct position.

“Spread your legs a little more,” Alec ordered, watching Simon’s feet shuffle further apart. “Good. Alright, come at me. I want you to try to attack me from the waist down.”

Simon nodded at Alec, face full of determination. “Got it. Get ready for a takedown, Lightwood.”

Alec snorted and got into position. “You’re going to regret that, Lewis.”

Simon ran at Alec, bringing his staff around to hit Alec’s waist, only to have it stopped by Alec grabbing the staff and pushing his own into Simon’s stomach. Simon staggered backwards, clutching at his stomach dramatically like he had been stabbed. Alec rolled his eyes and took a step forward, bringing his staff down on Simon, feeling immense pride when he saw Simon block his attack and pushing Alec back a few feet. Simon went for a swipe at Alec’s feet but with an easy jump, Alec dodged the move. He threw his staff to the side and jerked his chin at Simon to do the same.

Simon nodded and threw his staff in the same direction that Alec did. He came at Alec with his fists and Alec had to hold back a laugh at how badly Simon had been trained in close combat. Alec caught one of Simon’s wrists and pulled the mundane against him, spinning him around so that Alec’s chest was to Simon’s back. He brought an arm around Simon’s neck, holding him tight and kicked at the back of his knees until Simon fell to the math. Alec tightened his hold on Simon, smirking down at him, until the mundane hit the mat quickly multiple times in defeat. Alec let go of Simon and took a step back, letting the poor boy catch his breath.

“So, what were you saying about a takedown?” Alec jested, raising an eyebrow at Simon.

Simon crouched over on all fours, coughing, before he turned his head and glared at Alec. “One of these days, Lightwood, you’re going to be at my mercy.”

Alec could only laugh at that, turning away from Simon to grab his towel from the bench by the wall. He wiped off the sweat on his face and dripping down his neck before placing his towel around his neck and taking a big gulp of water from his bottle.

“Hey, Simon?” Alec said as be turned back around to face the mundane, voice strangely soft.

Simon looked up at Alec and tilted his head. “What’s up?”

“I know I haven’t said it, because maybe I’ve been too nervous to say it but… thank you. Thank you for what you did in Edom.”

“Oh!” Simon piped up. “No need to thank me. I didn’t really do much.”

“Simon, you gave up your immortality to save me, save the world, save Magnus. I think you did a lot more than you give yourself credit for.”

“Alec, I never wanted to be immortal. I never wanted to be a vampire. You’re making it seem like I had to sacrifice my life for everyone, but I couldn’t be more happy right now to be human.”

Alec furrowed his eyebrows. “You don’t regret it?”

Simon shook his head and smiled. “Not at all. I don’t think I would have enjoyed going on living and watching all the people I love die, especially Jace. I want to grow old with him.”

Alec opened his mouth to say something then closed it then opened it again. “How did you, um, how did you deal with all that when you were a vampire?”

Simon’s eyes naturally rolled up as he thought about his answer before landing back on Alec. “I didn’t really deal with it, I guess. I knew it was always there, in the back of my mind, but I chose to live each day as it came. I didn’t want to think about any of you guys dying. I already think about it enough with the kind of lives you lead but the thought of outliving everyone is not appealing and I’m good at ignoring my own issues.”

“What about Jace?”

“Jace?” Simon hummed in thought. “You’re going to have to ask him. We did have a talk about it once and then we pushed the issue under the rug to be dealt with later. I guess we don’t have to deal with it now.”

Alec nodded in understanding. “Just saying, pushing issues under the rug isn’t healthy for any relationship.”

Simon cocked an eyebrow at Alec. “You’re one to talk.”

“What do you mean?” Alec asked, looking away from Simon.

Simon rolled his eyes. “I’m not stupid, Alec. This is about you and Magnus, isn’t it?”

Alec chose to stay silent and Simon only needed that as confirmation to his question.

“Look,” Simon started, “you guys should talk about this. From experience, I can assume it’s not easy for Magnus to have to deal with the fact that you will die one day, but it’s also not easy for you to deal with the fact that Magnus is going to keep living. It’s a lot to process and I think a conversation with Magnus would be much more productive than a conversation with me.”

Alec sighed. “I know.”

Alec would be lying if he said he hadn’t been thinking about what Asmodeus had said to him in Edom. It was constantly on Alec’s mind and he took on as many tasks around the Institute as he could to get his mind off of it, but it was always there. He knew Magnus could tell there was something wrong, but Magnus never pried, letting Alec come to him when he felt ready. Alec was not sure how to bring it up. He didn’t have a solution or an answer for what he thought they could do. Magnus was immortal, Alec wasn’t. What did ‘forever’ mean when one of them didn’t have forever?

“Alec, it’s going to be okay,” Simon reassured, coming to stand in front of Alec, putting a hand on Alec’s shoulder. “You guys love each other.” Alec didn’t bother to correct him. “You’re soulmates. You’ll figure it out.”

Alec nodded and gave Simon a sad smile in thanks.

“Well, I’m going to go find your parabatai,” Simon declared, clapping Alec on the shoulder, “because I’m missing him and I require some love after you beat it out of me.”

Alec snorted and shook his head. “Same time tomorrow, Simon.”

Simon waved a lazy hand at Alec. “You just talk to Magnus, okay?”

“I’ll think about it.”

Simon rolled his eyes. “Talk. To. Him.”

“Go. See. Jace,” Alec said, enunciating each word as Simon had done to him, pushing Simon away from him and towards the door. “He’s getting impatient.”

“Fine, fine,” Simon conceded, running towards the door of the training room before turning back to Alec with a serious expression. “I mean it, talk to him.” Then he was out the door.

Alec sighed. He knew Simon was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and making it this far! If you want to keep going on this journey, make sure to subscribe to get updates. Please leave some comments and kudos :)
> 
> Love y'all,
> 
> Beatie :)


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